Would you go for a girl that's still sleeping with her ex?

[PunkEng013]

I've known this girl for about 2 years now, but we hadn't seen much of each other during the last one and mostly kept in touch through internet. When I met her she was in a relationship but has now been single for a while. Recently, we've been seeing each other more often and we've been getting closer and flitier with each other. I'd never thought of her in that way before, but I'm starting to get interested in dating her. The thing that's holding me back is that she says she still sleeps with her ex occasionally because needs the affection. Would you guys still go for it, or does it sound like too much trouble?

[Anonymous]

Hell f***ing no.

I'm not going for girls either way lol, but me being a girl; hell no, I would not go for a guy who is sleeping with his ex.

For one, it says something about him in multiple ways. He is so selfish to get a sexual fix from a girl he's no longer romantically into while he tries to create something romantic with someone else on the side. We are all selfish to an extent, but there are some people who are so selfish that they will hurt others and put people in uncomfortable predicaments if it means getting what they want. I would not get involved with a guy knowing that type of selfishness is within him.

Plus the whole needing the affection thing is another turn off. It still points back to the selfishly using someone to get what she wants, but not only that, it's like 'What's real and what's fake? What's genuine and what's _____ just needing affection?'

Those are my main two issues with this. I would not get involved with someone who is acting like that. I want someone with more self respect and isn't so selfishly impulsive. Plus it's just kind of nasty like you've got feelings for this person and they just had someone else's p**** and juices all over them earlier before you hung out? Or even a few days earlier. I'd be totally turned off and keep it moving.

[Opinion Owner]

or in your case, there's this girl you like and want to kiss, but she's had another dude's d*** in her mouth and all over her lips because she "needs affection". It's just not the type of situation I'd welcome.

[saelym]

I'm the kind of girl who would do that, and I personally wouldn't bother getting into anything with someone who does.

It'll probably stop when she gets that affection from you. However, I still wouldn't bother if I were in your shoes.

Why? Because if I really want something with someone new, I forget the ex and move on to the new beau as soon as I've made that decision. Sure, the ex could be a friend with benefits, but why bother keeping him around when I have better prospects in line? If someone doesn't see me the same way in that situation, we're not worth each others' time.

It might not be a total red flag, but you should at least be very cautious about proceeding.

[xina001]

If you are really interested in this girl you should tell her how you feel and if she feels the same way about dating you and if she does then tell her the truth that you don't like the fact that she still sleeps occasionally with her ex, if she is willing to stop doing it you should give it a chance as long as you think she is worth the try... the fact that she is honest about telling that she still sleeps with her ex you should take it as a good sign that means you can have a trustworthy, well communicated relationship in the future. good luck !

[PunkEng013]

Well, it never did work out with that girl. She actually turned me down and went back to her ex. Then thanked me for helping her realizing that that was what she had to do. But nevertheless, your answer made the most sense, so thanks.

[misuzi]

No way. If a girls not got enough respect for herself to fully seperate, why should you even trust her?

Not only is it desperate, but it's the most pathetic excuse I've ever heard. "I need affection" Then go out and develop feelings for someone instead of being available to people you're not interested in.

[HardAppleCider]

That's about - 3 points in interest on a scale of one to 10. If I'll still go for her depends on how low it is now and what my current minimum standard is.

Ok, I don't really operate with hard numbers like that, but you get the idea.

[Prof_Don]

Frankly...hell no.

Why?

Because no matter why ANYONE says, guy or girl...if you're still f*cking your ex, there's still feelings there for the other person.

-----

Frankly I have too much self-respect to have to fight an ex she she is WILLFULLY f*cking...for her emotional attention.

[Freetobe007]

lol

[12elizabeth]

enough said

[gettinthroughthepain]

I said the same thing to my self for years. But desperation is a silent killer -_-

[Betwyn]

Once you two have something..

It will stop.

I'm starting to see this guy Jason..

Last night, I messed around with my ex...

its like a FWB thing.. you know what you are getting.. what works and what doesn't...

But when a new relationship becomes "exclusive" the ex-sex, stops.

[sfauo]

Never.

Have more self respect, how you gonna be with a girl who's still banging another dude. "needs the affection" ha ha that's one of the lamest things I've heard.

[BobSacamano]

If you really like her, I'd let her know how you feel and tell her you want her to be exclusive with you and vice versa.

If she gives you any other answer but yes, or makes excuses, it's time to move on to someone else.

[posted]

No, sounds like baggage/drama and just odd in general.

[12elizabeth]

seriously why would you even do that,..thats like an automatic red flag right there!

[Anonymous]

SKANK