My good friend was drunk and told me she loves me but I don't know what to think...
We're both 20 and met 2 years ago in high school. I've always had a crush on her but never told her. She had a boyfriend so I never tried anything but we became good friends. She had a baby last year and I tried to stay friends but to keep my distance because of her boyfriend and baby and I just didn't want to ruin our friendship I guess. But she broke up with her boyfriend recently and we've been talking about hanging out some night and thursday she texted me and said her mom can take the baby and asked if id come hang out so I said ya. she was talking about ecstasy and said she'd like to get some when we hung out. so I figured she would want to get into something. We never ended up getting the pills that night but I brought alcohol. after we drank for a while she came and sat by and we started playing cards. we were starting to get drunk and I could tell we were kind of both nervous but I didn't say anything. Out of no where she asked if I ever think about kissing her and I told her ya, and we just started talking and she told me she always liked me but didn't want to ruin our friends ship and I felt the same way. she had me kiss her and we just talked for a while . we ended up drinking more and started getting hotter. I kept telling her I didn't want to go any farther than she wanted too. but we ended up kissing for a while and she had me go down on her. After a while she told me to "nail" her but I knew she was drunk and I just couldn't do it. I wanted to wait to see how she felt the next day. The next day we talked and she said she was embarrassed but she didn't remember half of what happened. when I told her, she didn't seem upset that anything happened and said she had fun and wanted to hang out again but not drink, so I don't know if she wants to try and do anything while she's not drinking or not get drunk because we might do something. She seemed very happy cuddling and just holding hands. she said she waited 2 years just to hold my hand. so I think she still wants to maybe go somewhere with it because we kind of have chemistry but she said she wants to wait to get married to have sex again but I doubt that'll happen. but my question is should I just strictly try to be her friend now or should I try to go farther. She lives alone and said I can stay over whenever I want and has asked me to move in to help with rent but I think I'm the only person she has asked. please give me your advice on whether you think she does want to be only friends or not. PLEASE
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Most Helpful Opinion
Shes most likely confused. she's a single momma which is hard and I'm sure she does have feelings for you but she was also embarassed about having them so quickly brought out. YOU need to think really seriously before you try to get into anything with her. she has a baby and that is not a small thing. its not like a dog. if you stay around and become a part of the kids life and things don't work out the kid will be the one who suffers. and god forbid you get her pregnant and it doesn't work out. I suggest you tell her...if you really want something serious. .. that you have always had strong feelings for her, but that you would like to take things slow if she's willing to see where it might lead. date for a while living seperately, try not to stay overnight too often, and if she wants to postpone the sexual side of things you need to be able to respect that and if she changes her mind so be i, but you shouldnt try to coax her into it if she not ready to go that far just yet. anyway, just be careful and if you do get involved take things slow for everyones sake.
What Girls Said 3
Umm... She has a kid and she was trying to get drugs and you're still considering her? Am I the only one that finds that to be a big deal? She doesn't seem to have her life together and if I was a guy I wouldn't bother UNLESS I thought I could help her out. Since she asked you to move in I'm guessing that is what she is after too. She needs help, wants a guy, but is relying on you because she knows you.
Whatever you do PLEASE don't let her use you and talk to her about drug use. That's the #1 reason people lose custody of their children where I'm from. I hope everything works out to be the best for you, her, and the baby.