Would you marry a guy who never went to college?

[Jager66]

currently less than 40% of men will graduate from college, that's 140 women with college degrees for ever 100 men with a degree. at best its expected to get worse, on top of that jobs traditionally held predominantly by men are evaporating at an alarming rate so that means allot of poor uneducated men out there. what are your thoughts ladies will you marry a uneducated man with shaky employment status because that's the reality shaping up in the next few years.?

Updates

+1 y

thats exactly my point! No woman wants to marry an uneducated man with little for career prospects! yet the reality is only a very few will have the opportunity to marry the educate men.

[Capoeria_King]

First off a college degree doesn't make you educated it's just a piece of paper I graduated from one of the top business schools in the country and plenty of idiots graduated as well. True education goes beyond the classroom and true wealth comes from knowing how to make money without a job it's really not hard to get a college degree. Also there's not a ton of lonely formally educated black women running around that's more of a myth that the media plays into for a number of reasons and I can get deeper into that but I don't want to focus on that.

I want to focus on the economy which is an absolute joke right now. Regardless of what's being portrayed in the media there is no recovery taking place at least not amongst the avg everyday citizen and things are only going to get worse. Student loan debt has now surpassed credit card debt and is currently the biggest bubble in the U.S. and the avg kid coming out of college right now can't find a job or if they do it's some BS retail/customer service position. Here's the situation you graduate from college you have tens if not hundreds of thousands of dollars of student loan debt to pay off but you're either unemployed or underemployed(by the way this isn't my situation I'm just speaking on the reality for many people in America right now). My point is this a college degree doesn't guarantee anything "many more American’s have a bachelor’s degree today than say in 1992 yet unemployment for college educated Americans is at modern record highs". Does having a degree help I guess so but like I just mentioned look at how many people are coming out of school and are actually worse off than they were before due to student loan debt. Many fields that students go to school for today the jobs just aren't there anymore and many of them are not coming back. Also keep this in mind in the 50's, 60's, early 70's America actually produced goods so a lot of men who didn't have college degrees or weren't formally educated were able to get manufacturing jobs that paid very well. You know who the future millionaires are people who actually produce goods and you don't need a college degree to do that.

I know my rant is somewhat off base and as a man I can't answer your specific question but I wouldn't get into a serious relationship with an uneducated woman and when I say uneducated I don't mean lacking a college degree I mean lacking an understanding of what's going on in the world. When you have a true education you can always make money.

[Jager66]

i like it tho, its worthy of another question along the lines of, is it worth marrying someone with a useless degree? they cost tens of thousands of dollars, offer no real job prospects, and unfortunately women are the ones most likely to take tho courses. English lit etc..

[Capoeria_King]

I think that all depends on the individual and how much weight a person places on a college education. It's foolish to go into deep debt though but like I said above I'm more concerned with a real world education than a college one. I won't marry a woman who isn't able to support herself without outside assistance(if she makes 30 grand a year and is able to support herself I'm cool with that.) because I'd feel like I'm being used for my money.

[dalila]

Totally agree.Great answer!

[TyroneJayJackson]

I know this was targeted at ladies but I just want to point out that it's not just guys who's never went to college that are losing their jobs. It's the majority of who aren't good at it. Just because they never went to college doesn't mean that they can't keep that job. In a proven study the guys who never went to college are more than likely to get a job than the guys who did go to college because the guys who never went to college actually want to earn money to survive, The people who went to college have a lot more options and just use this money to buy luxuries. Sorry if I have annoyed you.

[Jager66]

im not annoyed thanks for your input,

according to U.S. Census Bureau statistics from 2007, the mean high school graduate income was $31,286, roughly $26,000 less than the $51,181 earned by college graduates

the poverty line is US$11,161 right now based on 1960's formula, when adjusted to modern variables it is US$18,973. it should be noted that just being over that number by a few thousand makes nearly no difference to the standard of living. so the average man will be just above poverty.

[gemglam]

I think its true that not only uneducated guys lose their jobs. But we must face the fact that most couple will break up because of finance. If more people didn't worry about money we would live in euphoria but that's not the reality. Lets face it money matters and the lest educated guy is more likely to have less of it. Money is not everything but it has some pull.

[Katyperry]

wow very impressive..bu ofcourse it depends on the job... for me the most important thing is "you and your partner are secure and love each other,theres harmony,trust and respect...money is just a money but ofcourse still part of it...it takes two to work it out :)

[Anonymous]

This is for all the dudes who think that a woman saying she wants an educated man is the same as a guy saying he wants a blonde - sorry, that comparison doesn't work. Please take the time to read these women's responses. They are explaining that they are looking for compatibility, and so they want someone who values education as much as they value education. That is very different than simply judging a person based on looks.
It is not crazy or rude or stuck-up to want someone with the same morals as you.
If a virgin wants to date another virgin, that makes sense. The guy doesn't believe in sex before marriage so he is looking for someone is compatible, someone who is also a virgin. That is fine.
If a dude has a sex with a bunch of women but says he wants a virgin, then he is a jerk. That is a double standard. He is not looking for compatibility, he is looking for a ridiculous, illogical standard.
If a fit guy is looking for a girl who works out, that makes sense, because fitness is a part of his daily routine and he wants a girl who has the same routine as him.
But if a guy who doesn't care about his appearance expects a girl to look like a model, that is a double standard and makes no sense.
If a girl says she wants a guy with a college degree even though she never went to college, that is a double standard and doesn't make sense.
BUT if a girl went to college and worked hard to pay off student loans and is rising in her career, it makes sense for her to want a guy with the same motivation. MOST OF THESE GIRLS ARE SAYING THAT. They are not asking for a silly expectation, they are simply looking for someone similar to them. That makes total sense.

[Jager66]

It's just much more nuanced then that.

Placing a high priority on compatibility is mandatory but so is having good and well understood priorities. If your goal is to have an equal partnership on paper where you can check off boxes of equality then you are right. If you want a compatible relationship you need to be able to compliment each other instead of finding your self at odds with each other.

For example: 2 education/career ambitious people will almost certainly not have enough time for each other let alone other things like raising children and what happens when one/both are offered a major job advancement in different cities? Finding people with great personal qualities, even ones you have a lot in common with has nothing to do with having an education.

It's about building a life not checking box's, most men know this and that is why successful men often choose to marry less career oriented women, it allows room to build a life together. Women often fail to see this

[Opinion Owner]

why do you say that 2 education/career ambitious people will not have enough time for each other? Most families (in America at least) have both parents working since its practically impossible to raise a family on one salary. And they have time at night. Plenty of people date in college and once they graduate they get married. And not all careers require you to move to different cities. Being career-oriented doesn't mean you have to rise to the very top of your field. Take teachers and nurses for example. They are very happy being teachers for the rest of their lives.
You're right, personal qualities are super important to compatibility. But for some people, having the same morals is also really important. For some people, having the same interests is important. Education doesn't have to be important, but for some people it's more than just checking off a box. It's not the fact that you have a paper degree, it's the fact that you are dedicated enough to spend 4 years learning

[Jager66]

I think what I'm having trouble getting, I really want to "get" it, is why formal education is equated with dedication to learning when all other forms of dedication to learning are disregarded. A passion for learning is something inherent to a persons personality, plenty of people go to school with no passion to learn and plenty of dedicated learners never go to school. There are also many ways and things to learn, what about things like a skilled trade, musical talent, dancing, martial arts, sports, spirituality, sailing and so on etc...

Is it the passion for learning that is desirable or the perceived potential for money that is desirable? or am I missing something entirely?

[Opinion Owner]

It's the passion for learning that is desirable. And yes, I agree with you that you can have that passion without having a degree. But in our society today, getting a college degree is a standard. Kids are expected to go to college. And I think this is unfortunate, because there are jobs that don't require a degree. And kids are graduating with degrees and still don't have jobs. But anyway, I think that for many people having a degree has become the best way to prove that you have that passion for learning. Society expects everyone to go to college now, so we are now placing that expectation on each other.
So yeah, I think you can be passionate about learning without a degree, but I think it's harder to prove that if you don't have a degree.

[Jager66]

Ah ok cool, thanks for your input. It's tough sometimes to understand someone with very different perspectives but I get it now, makes lots of sense.

[gemglam]

For the most part women like a guy who will bring some security to the table. Unfortunately, you can't build much of a life with a guy who's foundation is on shaky ground. Compatibility also include being able to talk to your mate about various topics and lets face it, its hard to talk to a guy who doesn't have the similar level of education as yourself. For instance I used to think that it would not matter if a guy lacked education but when tried to talk to someone without education, I would say certain things and he would then ask me what I meant. At first I would answer but it gets old after a while when you're not being understood. It made me feel absolutely horrible. If you are in school, he usually doesn't understand why you have to study and sometimes he makes you feel guilty because of it. Of course there are exceptions to every situation but for the most part its hard for a woman to date an uneducated man without feeling like she is always doing something wrong.

[Jager66]

i can understand that, makes allot of sense.

not only educated women will want educated men either so what do you think will happen when all women want one of the less than 40% of men who went to college? what will the other 60+% of men do? I think this is going to be interesting.

[gemglam]

Well I believe an educated man will always have more respect for an educated woman. I also believe that at one point the less educated woman will try to get someone on her level since she will eventually think that the more educated man will think she is unintelligent. People are more likely to be drawn to someone like them. They might find the more educated man to be more of a snobbish pedant.

[Jager66]

maybe, its possible but I just don't see that happening, not on a grand scale anyway. dating isn't a mental exercise few woman will want to settle, just how now there is a huge amount of lonely black women who don't date or marry because so few black men are college educated.

i agree that for things to work many women will have to rethink their requirements in a mate or remain single. I also think there will be a few men with allot of women chasing them. I know a few church groups like this and

[Jager66]

the woman really don't like it.

[gemglam]

I think you have a valid point. Its the age old question of what if? Putting education aside there are still twice as many women than men on the planet (dont quote me one the statistics please), so someone is likely satisfying more than one woman. It is the way it is. But take it from a single woman who is looking for a guy who doesn't care about what a guy looks like or how tall he is (though I care about whether or not he can carry on a meaningful convo) I would rather be single than unhappy.

[Banquo]

Coincidental, but I was just perusing through the most recent issue of National Geographic, and it says there are 1.01 men to every woman.

[Anonymous]

i wouldn't date a guy who has no college education and/or shaky employment status. these days its all about masters degrees, PhDs, law degrees, etc. a college degree today is the equivalent of what a high school education once was. you can go to college. some of the dumbest people I know manage to get into colleges. my parents had little growing up and they worked their butts off to go to university, then my mom also got her masters. so if a guy isn't getting a degree, that's his problem. I wish him luck in life and we can be friends but not lovers. I'm bisexual and I feel the same about girls.

[genevieve]

Of course wealth is good and like gem said girls tend to go for the guys that bring a bit more financial security, especially becuase chances are you won't be able to work for at least a couple of months in your life.

But I think when I'll gradute from college I'll make enough money to allow myself to live comfortable and as long as he has a steady job I def could live with him not having a degree or making less money than me.

Also there are a lot of good jobs you don't necessarily need a degree for (i.e policemen, firefighters, mechanics, military, brokers, commercial pilots, farmers...) So at least regarding the financial situation it wouldn't be a deal breaker, as long as he is working.

Less than 40%? How did that happen , I bet 50 years ago the vast majority of all college graduates were men.

[Anonymous]

Why can't he go to college? Has he at least even went to trade school? What does he have to fall back on? It's just not smart not to pursue higher education if you can because it's hard to get a decent job if you don't have at least an associates degree. No I would not marry a man that did not go to college. I'm not saying he has to have a PhD but by the time you're ready to get married it isn't unreasonable to want a man who's gotten his bachelor's (4 year degree). If he can't be bothered to do that how can I expect him to properly support a family? I plan on graduating and getting a degree so what would I look like dating a guy with a high school diploma? If I can get it he can.

[kitty_purple_guru]

I would not. Don't get me wrong. I don't care about how much money he makes. I'd rather date someone who is educated but not well off than a rich man who has only a high school education. I believe that education broadens your horizons, changes the way you view the world, and demonstrates your ability to committ to goals and work through challenges. I need someone who has a similar appreciation for education. I have a masters. He doesn't need that, but I want a man with at least a bachelors. So that he can truly understand and appreciate me. Often, uneducated men are only about their most basic needs and desires. Not always. But enough.

[Jager66]

Plenty of people go to school to give in to their basic needs and desires for a few years before they have to take life seriously. All the things you listed are good qualities to look for but they have nothing to do with education and everything to do with the individual, their personality and passions in life.

Also why do you think a man has to have the same life experiences as you in order to appreciate you, is this projection perhaps? Are you unable to appreciate people who have accomplished things you have not, like say a skilled musician or athlete. You want broad horizons yet you also want someone with much the same life experiences as you which would severely limit the broadening of horizons.. I am confused by this.

Do you want someone who truly appreciates you or someon who can relate because they have the same life experiences?
Do you want someone with broad horizons because it's a life value they pursue or because it was forced upon them at school?
etc?

[Jager66]

I think my reply may have come out as more argumentative then it is meant to be.

[kitty_purple_guru]

You are taking leaps with what I said. Same life experiences are not necessary. An education, so that I know we share the same values and are on the same level as far as a broadened way of viewing the world, is.

[kitty_purple_guru]

And no, I can't understand people that do not wish to better themselves and are not curious and eager to learn. And I do not expect someone with only a high school education to understand all of the hard work and dedication it took to put myself through seven years of school and become a naval officer. I came from nothing and worked very hard to educate myself. I respect hard work, dedication and ambition. If I can't respect him, it won't work. And he probably would have a problem with all that I've done. How could someone who just went to high school and then did nothing else with themselves after ever see things in the sane way as someone who has done a great deal? And compatibility is essential. Love is all well and good. Without compatibility, love doesn't last.

[Jager66]

OK I think I'm starting to understand.

You value formal education above just about all else and you can't respect someone who prioritizes other values, enough that you would not consider dating them. You believe unless someone has gone through about the same experiences you have they can't truly understand things like hard work, dedication or ambition.

I was getting confused because education doesn't remotely have a monopoly on the others things you've listed when in actuality it is the formal education itself that you place value on not the other traits listed.

So something kinda like this:

Accepted:
Educated
Hard working
Dedicated
Ambitious
Broad Horizons
Passion for learning

Rejected:
Hard working
Dedicated
Ambitious
Broad Horizons
Passion for learning

[Jyesh]

There are so many persons who got degree but are still dumb! Having a degree does not mean you are broad minded. Never under estimate anyone.

[Hershey101]

I totally agree. I married a man who didn't go to college. My husband had a job with very low income and when pandemic hit, he lost his job. He struggled to find a new company that will hire him since he can't pass any interview. The problem with this kind of man who doesn't value education, he is not teachable. I can't talk with him that long since he knows nothing. and yes, uneducated men only know basic needs. They dont understand anything beyond basic.

[Cheekkky]

For me It's just important that he is working with something that he truly loves and that he gives 100%. He also needs to be able to support him self. I will be working too so hopefully we will be able to figure it our even if his job doesn't pay much.

[Jager66]

Yeah, this I can understand. I can even understand a preference for someone who is educated especially if you are not, needing to support a family in the future and all.

I am having a hard time understanding the people who value formal education over all other qualities.

[Cheekkky]

Ah, I see I don't understand that either. Education is important but I would give myself to someone completely just because he went to college. There are so many other things that are important.

[gemglam]

I would definitely date him if he is a plumber or an electrican or locksmith because when they have to come my house, they charge me a killing so they must make a lot of mula right? Trade school isn't college but it is handy. If you are a mechanic,I'll date ya for sure. Lol a little bit of humor is always fun.

[sinful1620]

ahh so you'd only seriously date a guy with money?

[gemglam]

Nope compatiblity is more important to me. I said it was humor.

[Katyperry]

Sorry to say this but NOPE because I know I'm a professional so I deserve a professional too someone whos not immature and someone who can teach and help his children regarding assignments,projects etc... according to studies 70% of the knowledge(intellectual) of the kids is inherit from the parents...

[Capoeria_King]

LOL so if a person lacks a college education that means their immature and would be a bad parent how did you come to that conclusion?

[Katyperry]

LOL... okay let me rephrase it...its not the meaning of it... I said I deserve a professional too but I did not say people who did not graduate in college are immature... I'm just saying that I deserve a professional one which is not immature when it comes in decision making which means I am referring to a person which I deserve got it?hehe :))

[Jyesh]

Meaning someone who doesn't have a degree is immature? Damn Your thinking itself is so unproffesional.. You should do your assignments homework and projects by yourself, its not your parents responsibility. It is you who gonna sit for exams not your parents! Parents are there to motivate you not to help you. You should acquire something on your own merit. If you need parents help to score points so better not call yourself Proffessional! Infact its called loser!

[Anonymous]

No offense, but no, I wouldn't marry an uneducated person because to me that's a huge turnoff. I don't see the point in dating (let alone marrying) with someone who doesn't share my interest -- books and knowledge. I would rather remain single for the rest of my life than commit to myself for an unhappy marriage. But then again, I'm not too into the whole marriage thing.

[Jager66]

books and knowledge are not exclusive to education, neither is intelligence, or potential.

[Opinion Owner]

I have never met a single person who's intelligent but never went to college. That only happens in the movies. Besides, oftentimes when a woman is significantly more educated in the relationship, men becomes very resentful of that fact, and I don't need that.

[Anonymous]

I'd rather marry a smart guy who excels in a trade than an egghead with a degree in something like philosophy. I'm intelligent, so the intelligence is a must. I don't know many intelligent men who didn't pursue any education.

[purple4ever]

Of course, simply because there's always tomorrow, but if he doesn't plan to go forever and ever, then that would be a huge red flag UNLESS he knows his stuff due to experience, which can't never go wrong.

[Anonymous]

Obesity rates are also climbing, doesn't mean men who are in good shape are going to start dating obese women. I have a degree and a well paying job, I'm not marrying a guy with a shaky employment status.

[Jager66]

obesity rates are climbing much faster for men than for women as well lol, its a sad stat of affairs.

[Opinion Owner]

lol guess there will be a lot of single women out there.

[Jager66]

lol yup men too. =(

[dudeman]

lol they bitch about me wanting a virgin when they won't date men that don't have a degree I went to college by the way but I would hope it wouldn't be a deciding factor

[sinful1620]

Ugh... the women's responses to this question are making me lose respect for women.

[sinful1620]

There's loads of difference between saying something like "I prefer brunettes", which both guys and girls say regularly and that's perfectly fine, and the girls here who are saying they want wealthy boyfriends.

[sinful1620]

You're using rationalizations for your behavior. It's a convenient explanation, that's all.

And stop projecting that all guys are shallow just because the girls here have shown themselves to be so shallow and put so much emphasis on "security". If you weren't ashamed of it, you wouldn't be using the euphemism for what you want in a man: MONEY.

[sinful1620]

oh OK so women are mindless androids programmed to chase wealth.

And I have taken a psychology course. Several. Once you get into constructivism, you look at how a culture perpetuates gender stereotypes by keeping them as desirable goals, and everything from there is pretty basic reinforcement and modeling.

The rest is wholly unscientific. I remember a Psych of Gender teacher trying to say "they think men die earlier because their cells are programmed to" with zero scientific evidence.

[sinful1620]

You're projecting that all guys are shallow to a similar extent to justify your beliefs. Guys don't place all that much emphasis in looks as girls do to compete with other girls.

[Anonymous]

If he didn't go to college but, somehow has a decent job thats lkng term and payed more than like 30 bucks an hour then sure!
Thats pretty rare so I'll have to go with no tho, except for this exception.

[Jager66]

Yeah that's true, depends where you like though. Where I'm from those kinds of wages are pretty normal. Even people who work at fast food places start at 15-17$ an hour, so you could move to some place like that and be surrounded by plenty of guys with money, if that's your thing.

[Jager66]

like = live

[Opinion Owner]

Wow thats odd! Where r u from? I live in Chicago and here thats what like teachers make! Fast food people make minimum wage?
And I'm going to college soon so i don't have to worry about meeting a guy who makes money haha.

[Jager66]

Norther Alberta, Canada. People come here from around the world to work and places like fast food joints close down because they can't get enough workers. It's been like this for a few decades at least.

[Jager66]

teachers in this province make an average of 58 500$ plus benefits, pension, group insurance etc..

[Opinion Owner]

Ohh now I get it..
I was confused as to how a fast food worked could make $15-17 but its because the Canadian dollar is worth slightly less than the USDollar so it evens out.

[Jager66]

yeah I guess there is a adjustment for that, so 15-17 would be more like 13.35 - 15.13 and cheaper healthcare.

[Opinion Owner]

Yes, indeed.

[diamond3]

No I won't. I will have my degree in 2 years. If I can do it y can't he? I don't want a guy who isn't as smart as me

[Jyesh]

Never ever be so ARROGANT! It takes a second for a king to become a pauper.. Dont be so over confident about your degree or u r sooo smart!! Crap! Who told you that you are smart? No one is born intelligent. And imagine you haven't even finished your degree you are so full if arrogance what will you be when you will eventually hild a degree? Everyone has got a special talent. Holding a degree doesn't mean you are perfect or so called smart👎Dont flatter yourself by yourself baby! When you have a degree it doesn't you know everything. There maybe some points that an uneducated person knows and you dont know! So better not to be over smart! You are not the first educated person on this earth!

[Anonymous]

As long as he has a job that pays more than min wage... college degrees don't mean a thing to me.. Especially if I love him and he loves me.

[Anonymous]

nope, just because he probably wouldn't be compatible with someone who has a master's degree...

[Anonymous]

College Grad = More Money

Women want more money

More Money = More Problems