What do girls REALLY prefer? Looks or personality...

I don't mean choose either one. But I'm confused...most girls seem to like a muscular guy because 'it makes her feel safe', yet many of you say 'beauty is only skin deep'...I just wanna know, do the majority of girls actually prefer a skinny guy with a nice personality?

I've come to realize we all prefer personality as no1 looks no2. Those who place looks first are probably shallow and immature, or interesting in linking up only, in which case yeah, its looks all the way...
Are you all being honest though? Cos it seems to me like some of you may be going for 'personality' because its the most valuable trait in a person, and totally overlooking looks/sexiness/charm etc which basically...are valuable too
Okay now I am beginning to understand why you women place personality as higher priority! Previously, as a typical guy I placed high value on a girl's physicality & sex-factor, but as the saying goes: 'reputation is for time; character is for eternity'.
It looks to me that women as a whole are definitely more personality driven, or deeper than that, character driven. Not sure what bearing that has on me though


Most Helpful Girl

  • We prefer you, you big stud ;)

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What Girls Said 79

  • Looks are what initially attracts you to someone for the most part (no not always depending how you meet, since I know someone will want to disagree with me). Then, if the personality fits and works right you're good to go. I don't ever say beauty is only skin deep...it's either you're attracted to that person or not. As far as being muscular, my personal answer is that the guy doesn't have to be muscular but I like a bigger body frame on a guy. Broad shoulders and taller than me, not obese but not skinny. Most girls just want a guy who is bigger than themselves because that's when we feel safe..and for the fact you look like a proportioned couple. Everyone is different though, little guys like big girls and big guys like little girls..vice versa!

    • So its a case of looks first, personality second?

    • Show All
    • Although you deny it, it must have hurt you. I was in a bad mood yesterday. I didn't mean what I said. sorry about that.

      btw, what is wrong with "germany"?

    • Strangers don't hurt my feelings...sorry

  • I don't really like a lot of bulk on guys as far as muscles go. I understand the bit about making a girl feel safe. I tend to be attracted to taller guys [rather than huge muscles] for this reason because it gives off the feeling of being bigger than me in general. I can take care of myself in most situations, but it's still a nice feeling. When girls say those things, it generally means, 'I'm attracted to ____, but not necessarily unattracted to someone not as ____.' Does that make sense?

    And I've never been interested in anyone I can't have an intelligent conversation with, or who can't make me laugh. So personality is indeed the most important thing overall.

  • In think it all depends on the person. Personally their has been a couple times where I wasn't physically attracted to somebody but fell in love with the person because of their amazing personality and how much we had in common. Yet, I have also only started dating a guy because I was physically attracted to him (I know shallow), and as the time went by I noticed that because of his looks he thought he was better than everyone, and he turned out to be a very evil person. Based on my experience I noticed that yes women do at first look at the persons physical attributes, but it the persons personality that makes you stick around. I have never heard somebody say that they stuck with a person for twenty years just because he or she was hot.

  • i would prefer a guy with good personality and character over a guy who only looks hot anytime! if he has a good personality and good looks, then good looks are a bonus!

  • I say looks to get my attention, and the personality to keep it.

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What Guys Said 18

  • Sexual attraction comes first. Sorry to say but if you don't appeal to a woman on a physical level she's not going to give you the time to charm her with your personality.

  • i know someone said it in here before me: but depending on the girl and guy and what he/shes looking for, at the particular time in his/her life (just sex or a serious relationship), it can be one or the other. Personally, 90 percent of the time, looks come first then personality. I will admit there are probably some rare occasional instances where two personalitites "click" really well and both people are genuine and mature enough to realize they would make a good couple regardless of any physical attraction. But in the real world, I think a relationship like that or any other wouldn't last because one or the other will move on to the "next best thing/fling." Its just human nature. I think people will come to realize they have to settle in the end. Lets not forget about money too. That's a major factor too! I think that would be an interesting poll between the three: looks personality or money?

  • Ah.. you have hit on the main difference between men and women. Men will choose the opposite. :-) and yes, we are shallow. But it is much like a woman who will pick the guy with the better job over the poor guy who would never look at another girl.

    Good Luck,


  • Girls want a guy they feel safe with, who respects them, and someone who can make them laugh. Looks are on their list of things to consider, but it is not at the top like it is for us guys.

    Good Luck


    • I like your answer!

    • Thanks sweetie.. :-) drop me a personal note if you ever want to chat.. I love new pen pals..

  • In a way, there both one and the same.

    Your personality is portrayed in how you carry yourself, how you behave and the aura that you give out. It isn't really about what you look like superfically, on a deeper level, if you have a nice personality, girls will pick up on it, if you are confident enough in yourself to send out the right signals. Your appearance, is ultimately decided by you, it isn't about whether your skinny or muscular, Its about how you express yourself with what you got, that's what girls are picking up on, on either a conscious or sub conscious level.

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