Hey everyone, so here's my situation. 21 year old guy, a bit of a social late bloomer "not to the point where I'm socially awkward." But I do struggle sometimes, and I've been with a few women, but they only wanted to stay "friends with benefits." (Which I'm more of a relationship person) But it's usually around women in not at ease. And most of you will think it's because I'm nervous around them.. Most of the time I'm not initially. I would consider myself down to earth and friendly. The reason why I do become nervous or feel out of place is because women seem to be standoffish or can't keep the conversation flowing and seem indifferent. All the work is put on my hands.. Some women even seem cold when I first talk to them. Almost kind of intimidated. Now this wasn't the case early in high school when I was super super shy.. I didn't come out of my shell until 18. Even then women seemed to take more of an interest and more receptive when I was younger and more shy. Lol? One thing il add is that I've been told I'm fairly Attractive ever since I hit 13 years old. I've been told by women my age, older women, gay men, and oddly enough straight men frequently. Here's a picture since people will probably ask...to cut to the chase, it seems that women ignore me when all I see myself is as a genuine , half way decent looking and down to earth friendly guy but women seem to auto reject or not give me the time of day when I talk to them.. Why is that?
I've definitely felt this whole thing before. Its very irritating. I've found it best not to to let their standoffishness etc bother you. Dont give your mind the power to think they are thinking negatively about you or that they view you in a certain way based on their body language etc. Dont care so much how they are viewing you. You dont know exactly whats going on in their head so dont try to analyze it. View them as shy and socially awkward and keep talking to them until they warm up. Believe you are being perfectly normal in talking to them and they are the ones with issues.
I defiently need to disregard the standoffishness lmao. Like I mentioned I'm actually quite shy myself. Had a very traumatizing childhood.. So I'm a bit shy around women, nonetheless when I'm not they seem to act the way as mentioned. Maybe they think I'm a player or something. Which I'm everything but.
I've definitely felt that too before. The player thing. I find it comical when people think that of me. But a lot of chicks are shallow and will judge on appearance and assume things are the way the want it to be. Its crazy.
You're attractive! But honestly lol, you have the typical look of a douchebag. I can clearly tell you're not from the way you write, I'm just saying from first impressions, a lot of women are kinda close-minded and will judge a guy based on how they look (or at least it seems like the ones you've met have done so, obviously not generalizing my girls out there). You're a good looking, tall-ish, blonde guy, with a chiseled face. A lot of those guys are stereotyped to be self centered and narcissistic because they're attractive.
You do look good lol, but some people won't react to that. Who knows what's been going on through their heads when you try to talk to them, might've been having a bad day. Some girls might not even want to be bothered at all, it doesn't have to be a specific reason lol we weird. And some girls are intimidated by good lookin people, probably couldn't process it like why he talkin to me.
I'd agree I think my self esteem could use some work. I assume the worst more then I'd like to. I'm a shy guy so it makes it a bit difficult if they're intimidated by me. And thanks for the compliment! I do find that some people think I'm an arrogant prick because of my looks. "I've been told this" but I'm not that way. Actually the opposite. I feel maybe women pre judge me and act cold.
Your welcome, yea that's just one of those stereotypes that good looking people have bad attitudes. I'm shy when it comes to that too tho, when people try to talk to me it's like I go to this mode to shun them so I don't have to react lol but run with your shyness we like to see someone tryin that's not coming off too arrogant.
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