Shy girls, can you help me figure her out?

[Anonymous]

I've known this girl for about 3 months. You can say she is the shy type bacause she doesn't really talk to people she doesn't know and keeps to herself unless she is with friends. I like her but I'm having trouble figuring het out. We have mutual friends, so she can be pretty chatty with them and joke but when I approach her, she seems nervous, she talks to me, but I can tell she is nervous. Usually when we are in a group and I make a joke, everybody will laugh, except her, she just smiles but she will laugh when others joke, I usually get sarcastic "HAHA"s or "you are hilarious". If somebody makes fun of me, she will laugh and agree with them or she will make fun of me herself, disagree with me, scold me if I say something politically incorrect, etc. She doesn't use my name but she will use friends names either on greetings or while talking. Recently she got upset because after a few days of not seeing each other, she said "hi" to me and I just said "whats up" and she told me she felt that I was "yeah, whatever"ing her. When we do talk we are always looking into each others eyes and she smiles and I can feel something, but she tends to be too bitchy towards me, so I don't know what's up. Even our friends will tease us about how we are always together and arguing like little kids, could you help me?

Updates

+1 y

So in your opinion which is better? A shy girl being nice or being a b*tch to a guy? I would assume it takes more effort to be difficult.

Updates

+1 y

I misspoke, she is not so much a b*tch as, too honest maybe? Example, one time I asked her "hey did you miss me?" and she said "why would I miss anybody, you especially?" and then later on one of our friends was leaving and she said "I'll cry if you leave" to our friend, and I told her "so you gonna miss him?" and she said "do you see me crying?" So she will lie (or not) to others, but she feels the need to be extremely honest with me, makes sense? I"m honored, in a way, she doesn't lie to me lol

[Anonymous]

WEll all I can say...she seems kinda shy, but at the same time your her target...and sometimes shy girl or not...as guys, girls act kinda ruff with guys they like, dpending on her past relations or crushes...if she tends to keep to herself, she won't go fast forwrd and say t your face "hey I have a thing for you", she either A) looks at you from a far, always keeping her distance, B) treats you like crap, and sometimes even put you in the spot ( unless she is like that...if she is and she likes you...she will take it to the max), c) that's how she is...

Either way, don't give her to much credit...if you do show a lot of interest she'll know...is like when you guys sense a girl likes you and for somereason either you react in a positive or negative way...as in be a jerk or at least somewhat cool...same with us, we sense a Disturbance in the FORCE!...and we are so sure of it!, oh trust me...we'll see how much you can take...either keep what your doing and expect her to tell you sometime if she does like you ( she might...probably), or act normal...treat her a little different, do something she normaly doesn't see from you, smile a little, say" hi" and not" what's up?"...ask about her, then give her ...a little space, when you make a joke...don't make note of her, just keep it cool and simple...pay attention to what she says, if she starts acting up...try to put a halt to it, not in a harsh manner...but a way to make her notice that she needs to hold her horses...she's not one to be telling on you or anything...just calm down, if she likes you she'll make note of it, and if you want you can tell her...but try to see how things go and if she actually stops being Helga from Hey Arnold =..=

[Anonymous]

She has a thing for you

"when I approach her, she seems nervous" - girls get nervous around guys they like

- Maybe she's scared of saying your name wrong?

when I tell a guy he's hilarious it's just a catch phrase that I usually use, I use it all the time and I don't mean to be sarcastic (I hope it doesn't come of that way..)

The only reason I would get mad if a guy just said, what's up, is if I was expecting more, and it just didn't happen. We build up expectations that we'll have an amazing conversation with a guy and then when all we get is a what's up we feel let down, only because we've made these expectations up in our heads.

Sometimes (always for me) when a girl likes you, she'll be "bitchy", its a defence mechanism. Poke fun at you, disagree with you etc.

what you should do next:

"we are always looking into each others eyes and she smiles and I can feel something" - You can feel something! Maybe the reason she's so bitchy is because she doesn't know that you like her back. It can be so frustrating to like a guy, but to never (really) know.

You said you felt something ... ask her out. If you think she's worth it, go out of your way

[Opinion Owner]

seeing someone as being Bitchy is a perspective,

she might not actually be a bitch, and I'm sure she doesn't realize this either

maybe its just your perspective of her because you think she might not like you

call her talk with her

unless you really don't want her

Don't ever like someone just because they like you, and don't stop liking someone because you think they might not like you

I would say she likes you

for all you know she might perceive you as a man bitch, even though you aren't

[Asker]

Yeah,I don't really think she is a bitch just...her behavior is different towards me, We do talk and we have fun and laughs, but those laughs usually come from trying to outsmart each other, or being a smartass or sarcastic or playfully mean, they don't come from just regular chit chat, we have spent a lot of time talking to each other, that we know each other well. Even when we are with friends and she gets bitchy with me,our friends gasp in disbelief because they don't know that side of her lol

[Opinion Owner]

I've always thought that, that was how to get a guy interested. To be a smartass, to have quips, to be mean but in a playful sense. I think the reason that you guys/she keep doing it, is because you think its how to get the other person to laugh. I think this is the start/flirting stage (trying to make fun of each other but not in a actually mean way) She like's you, I would know, I'm just the same way. try to stop saying sarcastic remarks & try getting into more real compliment, she'll follow.

[Asker]

I know, at first she would take my compliments as if I was making fun of her, but now she accepts them, but I try it not to do it too much, don't want her to get a big head. She will compliment me on little things and I would say things like "I'm so used to you being mean to me, that you actually scare me when you are nice" lol

[aggiipaggii]

Hi!

I think she likes you. Pretty obviously, she likes you.

She just may not have the best experiences with guys and how to flirt etc, do you understand? She think she's doing the right thing to make you like her, but she is actually comfusing you!

I don't really know what to say, but I've been a shy girl. Whenever a guy even looked at me I wnated to just run away from there!

But, the best thing you can do to make her "soften up" a little bit is to compliment her, be just nice, and SMILE. just like you are doing with her now =) ...

This is pretty hard. I would suggest you to talk to her as much as you can to reduce the bitchyness and the shyness. The more you talk to her, to better self esteem she'll get, and also maybe skip the mean comments.

This maybe wasn't very helpful, but good luck anyway!

[Asker]

Every bit helps thanks! Like I said, its not so much like she is bitchy, she is very blunt. She is extremely nice to others and when we are all together and we are playing "rough" our friends can't believe some of the things she says to me, she is joking, but its very mean (we are both that way). We haven't seen each other a lot in the last week and when I did see her was the time she got upset because I only said "whats up" to her,then she said she didn't care what I did, but obviously she does

[Enejh]

Yeah, she's into you. The fact that she is shy causes her to be more abrupt with you. She may be so nervous she doesn't know how to act around you. Being a little cold and honest may be her way of putting up some kind of defence. She's into you, but she is very shy. When you put that she usually agrees with other people in the group, tells me she has relatively low self esteem and doesn't want to disagree with her friends.

You should see how she acts when you guys are alone in comparison to when you are around people.

[Saturnine]

I agree with the previous two, she's definitely into you. I am extremely shy, but I definitely get a kick out of playfully insulting a guy I have genuine feelings for. I guess you could consider it a defense mechanism or something...I learned recently though, that I do accidentally hurt his feelings sometimes, even if I insist that I was only joking. So I'm gonna lay off the teasing for a while and develop the courage to be more from up with him. Anyway - if you feel she really is being a bitch towards you, you can confront her about it civilly, and maybe she'll lighten up.

[Anonymous]

I also think she like you but she trying be hard to get! And you known her for 3 months, I wonder how she haven't opened up to you yet! Ask around and ask her friend to see what is her fears and likes, stay being yourself and never change.

She probably never been in a relationship or that if she had a boyfriend he treated her wrong and don't want to open her heart out to another person. But yeah she like you she just doesn't want to mess up the friendship between you guys.

Lol be around her and make her laugh more do things that will make her smile and hang out with her show her that you are good for her. She will maybe kick in to you and tell you her feelings about you!

Hope this work.. Goodluckk(:

[kimsparrow]

i'm kind of a shy girl myself but if someone just starts talking to me I'll obviously be chatty. it sounds like she's trying to hide the fact that she likes you... maybe she's a bit insecure about this and tries to hide it with all that teasing. I wouldn't say she's being bitchy. I'm not sure but try to get HER to talk to YOU... maybe don't talk to her for a while until she says something. I hope I helped you. goodluck!

[cincy2014]

Idk about her specifically but I know I'm like that sometimes, 1)guys I like and 2) guys I know like me (at least as a friend). if we're in a group and I don't really know anyone else I pick on them so I feel more comfortable and because I know they can take a little teasing, besides it gives us something to joke about. Id say she probably likes you if she keeps eye contact and is nervous around u, the teasing is probably her way of calming her nerves

[nichole11111]

I think she likes you, but she is just playing ahrd to get. I know a lot of girls that do that . I would ask around to your friends and her friends and ask if she likes you or not. If that doesn't work you should ask her out yourself and see what happens.

[lovebri913]

yea, I think she is trying to flirt by making fun of you, but is not very good at it so she's taking it too far. its kinda like the girl version of pulling on someones hair.

[Jessi91]

Sounds like she likes you and is just afraid if you notice you will turn her down or act weird around her and she doesn't want to be teased by her friends by showing that she likes you so she's playing hard to get. Maybe just ask her to go do something just the 2 of you and hint at it a little.

[Anonymous]

Dude, she's absolutely into you. I think I probably act similarly around guys I like. She probably doesn't realize she's coming off as disinterested or mean. My guess is that she likes you but doesn't want to come off as over zealous or act all flirty and fussy over you. I say go for it. Talk with her. Tell her you're into her. It may be scary, but trust me there;s nothing better or more attractive than when a guy openly tells you how he feels without you having to play games.

[Anonymous]

Well, I'm a shy girl when I like a guy, but only when I like him, so I guess I can speak to it. Um, personally, I do tease the guys I like. For sure. So, I'm not sure what's necessarily "better", but I definitely think this girl digs you.

[justlivinglife]

There is a book called Why Men Love Bitches...so it is not so much that she is bitchy as perhaps independent. Maybe that is the attractive quality that lures you to her, hence her independent nature?

[Somebody2love]

well it looks like she likes you just call her text her or talk to her alone and tell her you like her she migt like you back

[Anonymous]

Sounds like she probably likes you, but she's shy. Either that or she's just sort of a bitch. I think it's the former, however;)

[Cascade]

I'm assuming someone has reported this bot already?

[Anonymous]

dont think about it so much and treat her as if she isn't shy (or at least in your opinion) she may loosen up.