I realize now one of the main problems I haven't had anyone asking me out or date me yet, is because as soon as I meet guys, I just suddenly start being super friendly with them; even when I have crushes (even tho I could be a bit shy) I just literally become so friendly, outgoing, funny and constantly joking with them cause I want to create a light banter between us and create more connection and things in common.
But I realized that's not what most guys want when they want to date a girl and I literally had no idea about that. Maybe I should be more silent and mysterious with guys, so that they would want to chase me more.
Even the last time I had a crush i literally had to confess my feelings to his face months after I fell for him, and he told me he had no idea about them. Before that day, he used to invite me a lot in his room to watch movies with his mates, I was spending a lot of time with him and his male friends (I literally went out to drinks and play billboard with them) And the worst thing is that I thought I was being OBVIOUS about my feelings and intentions, until the night I confessed and he told me he didn't take up the hints. (Fortunately he said he felt the same lol) What's the problem here? Should I act differently with guys? Should I be less friendly with them? If I'm friendly with them, would they think I don't like them romantically?
HELP! What do guys think of girls who are super friendly with them? Do they think they are being flirty or that they put you in the "friendzone" ?
It happens to guys too. We believe we must befriend a woman before we are morally allowed to pursue her romantically. This means a lot of guys end up in the friendzone and they don’t know why.
I think this is happening to you. You just act like a friend and that’s what they believe you want. They don’t want to overstep boundaries with you, when you make it so clear that you want to be friends. Maybe? I dunno lol.
I say you may have to learn to flirt better. Tho don’t ask me how to do it but I can give an example I suppose:
A girl had a crush on me. She was invisible to me because I had a crush on another girl.
So the girl who likes me just started flirting with me like crazy. Always saying hi to me all happy and shit. Always asking for hugs. Always poking me in my side. Talking to me. Teasing me. And me, I was super shy, far more than I am now.
She really taught me a lot by doing this to me. Maybe it’s too over the top. Maybe she simply recognized that I was shy and she would have to work hard. I really don’t know.
But when I flirt, I do a lot of touching now. So that’s my tip. Touch the guy, as much as you can lol.
There's nothing wrong with being friendly, just don't rely on hints to get your feelings across. If you absolutely must drop hints, use good ones. Start bringing up the topic of dating and see where it goes. Don't just settle for hanging out as a hint.
Please don't do that to yourself and I'm telling you this by personal experience. And they hate the fact that you're being super friendly, guess what? That is not your problem that's theirs. If they think that you're putting them in the friend zone even though you're not. Guess what? That's not your problem, that's theirs. Men say that women have options, they have options too. So if they don't want to date you because of those things, move on to people that are worth the effort. There is no point getting yourself hurt and stop being yourself because they don't like you and maybe even themselves. I always apologize if I appear as if I'm trying to string someone along, but what I don't deserve is getting hurt and being shamed for being me. I at least love myself.
I don't really pick up on when someone is flirting with me and I can't take a hint to save my life. I just think someone is being friendly. Apparently I have been friendzoned several times because I was just oblivious that someone was into me and they assumed I wasn't interested in them. Personally for me I would rather you were just honest and direct about what you are feeling.
Lots of girls on social media say things like, "just because I smile at you or are nice to you, doesn't mean I like you" etc... Is it any wonder why guys aren't picking up in you being friendly? Also you shouldn't change how you are acting, but you can also say to the guy that you like him if he doesn't say anything
"Maybe I should be more silent and mysterious with guys, so that they would want to chase me more." ... This is not a thing. Only girls think it is. But it isn't.
Anyway, be friendly, just don't be like WAY TOO friendly. It's not that complicated, really. We don't want to think we turn her off, so yeah, be little friendly. Just don't overdo it.
Woa. Hold it. I will not agree to that. I like girls who are like that. If you came to me like that i would like it a lot. I might not know you want to date which is understandable but i wouldn't put off a girl for being "too friendly".
When people are crushing on someone they are usually a little bit shy or reserved around them. It's possible guys think you aren't interested in being more than friends because you are so comfortable with them. That being said, you need to be you.
You being you is what ‘’men’ appreciate in women. Guys on the other hand... probably shy/bashful virgins who will let them play video games all day and just look pretty.
I personally will think the girl is just being friendly if that were to happen to me what you said on here. I'd say be who you are if you like a guy, but touch him in a playful manner.
I'm sure I'm gonna be in friend zone my whole life
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Anonymous
(45 Plus)
+1 y
tldr; friendzone
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