I am sorry that this is happening to you. I know what you want to hear, but I can't tell you anything that will clear all of this up fast. Unfortunately, she has not ended her relationship with her ex-husband. It is just that simple. I do not know what she has told either of you, but she is basically holding you both hostage. Think of it in those terms, because until you decide to let go, that's what you are. "Her" hostage, just waiting on her, on her terms.
You already know what you need to do here, you are just having trouble doing it. If you really want to be with her, you have to tell her that you want to be with her but you are not going to be in this situation where you are dating a woman who is living with her ex-husband. Plain and simple. Do not give any ultimatum, you make your own decision here and let her make hers. It actually seems that she has done this already, my friend. She divorced him, but has chosen not to leave him. You do not know what goes on between two people in their own home, no matter what they tell you. Never. And if you think that they are just friends, well, that could be, may not be. You just have no way of knowing. That is the point.
You deserve to be in a relationship free of constraints of other people. So, tell her that is what you are doing. If and when she makes that decision for herself, and she leaves her ex, moves out & moves on, then she can call you. Then you need to stick with that. I emphasis the she moves out & moves on, as in stops seeing him all together.
I hope this helps you. Again, you deserve to have a loving woman who can commit to you. Good Luck.
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She is still living with her ex because she is a people pleaser? No, why divorce if she is still going to live with the guy. I hate to say this but if they are divorced and she still wants to live with him maybe she is trying to reconcile. Her excuse of getting stressed out is crap, I would stress way more if I still had to live with my ex and we were divorced. IMHO I think its an excuse to have her cake and eat it too. You're going to do what you want and I hope she woman's up and moves out if you really do want to be with her but it doesn't sound like she is serious.
dont wait for the things that so complicated..why she still think of happiness of her ex?because she still love or valued him ,people pleaser?that's not the valid ,there's other way to please others ,its just her reason so you won't get hurt because they love you both.
Remember:
if she love's you she must move out from the house of her ex,but still now she still with him
well,i don't have any idea..i know your really inlove with her
anyway,just observe her first if she really worth to your love
goodluck:)
If she divorced a guy within 3 months of marriage, what makes you think she is dependable, or reliable in any way? I can see your situation,however, I wouldn't put my faith or trust in someone like that. You are bound to get the same thing some where down the road, and it won't be a good situation to be in. I don't know how long you and this girl have been together, but from the sounds of it, maybe less than a couple months. Maybe you heard her side of the story,and you think you're helping her, or maybe its something else. But there's always more sides to the story than one may think, and I wouldn't always take the woman's side of the story to the word,without seeing it with my own eyes. E.G "He hit me" - Pic or it didn't happen,or even better, I'd rather see it. Breaking a vow is a serious thing to do, maybe not in today's society, but if you can't keep a promise for more than a few months, and the guy is getting deployed, it really says a lot about her character. But I'm speculating due to lack of details.
She is not your girlfriend. You're her rebound.
She's living with another guy! C'mon - don't believe her bullsh*t excuses like: "You have no idea how difficult/complex is it" - in female language it means "shut the f*** up"
If she would want to leave that guy and want to go to you - she would do that without hesitation.
Isn't that so?
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I really do think you should leave her. Let her know you still care. Wait for her (but keep your options open). She doesn't seem to really know what she wants to do. You can wait but not forever. Sticking by her will only make things more complicated than they really are.
@anon aka "nubianstarr" *I know its her because of her blocking me* She has a big chip on her shoulder. Either way, I find it hilarious she thinks black women should be dated instead because of some trait she thinks they possess. Either way who said she was 'white'? Lol you're making a lot of assumptions.
Dump her! Dude, if she cared about you, she wouldn't be living with her ex, would she? Leave!
I was gonna go with "so she still lives with her ex husband so what" bu I have to agree, it does sound like she's bullsh*tting you.
It's an unhealthy situation to be in. Who knows if she wil ever leave this guy? Imagine how long you could be waiting...
too bad my friend. you have to kick her and her ex guy's ass immediately. find another girl you can be happy with. trust me...
Honestly I think she does need to be given that Ultimaum. It seems like she doesn't really understand how that's crippling the relationshp.
its so tempting to rephrase it into "girlfriend not to be"
sould've dated a black girl
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