If you disappear completely. Will that make him miss me or will I lose him completely?

I haven't been able to get over my three year relationship after beeing dumped. We are staying friends but I just wanna disappear to avoid anymore pain. Will this make me lose him for good? Or should I stay his friend?


Most Helpful Girl

  • I'm currently in your situation.

    Actually, we broke up over a year ago, but I still haven't fully moved on from him, and I still think of him every day. We broke up on good terms, and technically we are friends, and I do still hope he will come back some day. So, until just two weeks ago, I kept all his contact details, so that if he wanted to he could contact me.

    I finally decided to delete his MSN because I didn't want to think about him anymore. It was a really hard decision, not just because he's a good guy and I didn't want to lose him as a friend, but also because guys have said that if I want him back, I should stay in touch. So sometimes I still question my decision to delete him.

    But then I remember that it's been a year, and it's me that has been holding myself back this whole time. As much as I fear forgetting him and losing him, I want even more to move on for myself, because I've held this hope for too long. And I remind myself too that if it's meant to be, it'll happen regardless of what I do. And if he wanted to, he definitely knows how to contact me.

    Sometime in the future, maybe a year or maybe longer, I'll definitely talk to him again, but until then, I'll do something for myself because I deserve it. And just trust to my status as his first love that he will think of me.


What Guys Said 1

  • Do you want to lose him for good? I'm in the same situation and wondering if girls think the same way. I'm having a hard time getting over my relationship after being dumped. She knows I want her back. If I disappear and give a girl space, will she miss me or will I lose her for good? It's the flip-side of your situation. If it were me, I'd want to stay friends.


What Girls Said 5

  • remaining as his friend will allow him the companionship he cared about when you two were together without having to carry out the responsibilities of a relationship.

    If I were you, I'd disappear for a bit. Get into something new, take a new class, meet new people, go to a new club with your friends, improve yourself in ways you hadn't before... Start to move on with your life. Trust me, he'll notice. :)

  • Dont stay friends anymore...Disappear...Maybe that will make him lose you but the majority of guys as I have realised till now use to hunt the girl while she goes away...I hope that everything will be alright but for god's sake don't stay friends with him anymore...Dont hurt yourself anymore...

  • Definately take time AWAY from him... so healthy for both of you! That is how I get over a break up, and it is sooo much easier! You can talk to him from time to time, but don't wait for his call, and DON'T call him! Let your brain rest completely! If you are a good person, and you had something special, and you are genuinly happy, he will want you back. And you can decide what you would like to do. Don't wonder if he will want you, know it deep down!

  • I am in a similiar situation at the minute. Me & my ex split up in June this year and we have remained in contact since then. Up until this week, things were ok, but now I am getting the feeling that he may have met someone else.

    I am wondering the same as you, should I just disappear & maybe he will miss me and return. Or should I disappear to avoid the hurt when I find out he is with someone else. If you remain friends, could you handle being told by the man you love that he is now happy with someone else?

    I don't want to lose my ex altogether, so I remain friends with him, but one day (if he doesn't decide he wants me back) I know I am going to have to end that friendship because deep down I know I wouldn't be able to handle the fact he is with someone, sharing happy times that I want to share with him.