Why are guys into tomboys rather than girly girls?

[Anonymous]

For as long as I've been old enough to be interested in boys I've noticed that girls who are into guy things like sports, cars, video games, motorcycles, and other things like that seem to have a much easier time snagging decent, quality guys than feminine "girly" girls who are into more traditionally girlish things.

This goes against everything we as girls (or at least me) were ever taught about boys at a young age. I am a girly girl, I'm not into "guy" things. I like makeup, fashion, and the color pink. I don't know anything about cars or computers or electronics or anything like that. I'm into fashion, I love romance movies and dramas, I love R&B and country music, and I guess I'm just what you would call a typical girl. I dress like one, I act like one, and I'm into the things you would expect a typical "girl" to be into. So why is it that its so hard for girls like me to get decent guys than it is for girls who are basically guys trapped in girls' bodies?

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+1 y

I think all of you misinterpreted the question. What I meant was, all the tomboy girls I see who are in relationships, the guys treat them good and are loyal to them. But us girly girls seem to only get the guys who lie, cheat, and just plain treat us

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+1 y

poorly. What is it about tomboy girls that makes them attract the GOOD guys, the DECENT guys, while us feminine girls only attract the dirtbags?

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+1 y

And why do all the tomboys seem to always get the drama free relationships where everything seems to go like it should?

[Anonymous]

theres a lot of scenarios involved, because people are different and want diff things, but some common trends are:

some guys feel more comfortable being friends with girls than guys, because men tend to be competitive with each other, its easier to open up to girls and talk about anything when you're a guy

when it comes to tomboys vs girly girls, guys feel even more comfortable around a girl who is just like them, meaning a tomboy...she can talk about sports, cars, jocks, she's one of the guys pretty much and it makes things at ease for them, they won't have to worry what she thinks of him or he won't have to impress her or anything...in my opinion, id say guys would see tomboy girls as JUST FRIENDS, nothing more than the friend zone...because its fun to hang out, talk to, care about and just chill have fun with someone like your own type

with a girly girl, there is almost like an innate tiny attraction between a boy and girl, there's always some type of interest in each other, that can be sexual and romantic, and because girly grls are so diverse from men, you can't compare a lot and have much in common as tomboys might, and that difference sets off a potential relationship between the guy and girly-grl...the guy always has to pose, and feels the urge to impress her, appear more manly in front of her, grab her attention, see where things might end up, there's always some sexual or romantic tension, that can turn into something wonderful...that tension doesn't exst with tomboys I think...generally for the most part...

so basically I think men feel tomboys are fun to be friends with, whereas girlygrls are usually only a potential romantic interest...

[Asker]

It would be nice if that were true but it just goes against everything I see with my own two eyes everyday. Also I'm pretty sure you misinterpreted the question. Read the update please. Thanks.

[Anonymous]

If you are not getting the "good" or "decent" guys, it could mean that you have no interest outside of those things you listed, and if you are only interested in those things, then is it really so hard to understand why you can't connect with guys on a deeper level? Heck, if we were friends and you couldn't talk about anything else, I might shoot myself in the head! Most guys don't care about fashion or "girly" things, especially if you talk about them and want to do "girly" things all the time. I guess I'm a tomboy--I am active, I can easily talk about anything (sports, electronics, politics, whatever), I enjoy doing down to earth things (eating at Mickey D's or wherever), and I'm super low maintenance, but it doesn't mean I'm a guy trapped in a boy's body. On a special occasion, I clean up nice and make my man think he's got the best of both worlds: a woman he can relate to, one who doesn't always have to wear make up or heels on a daily basis, but can be a stunner when I decide to tune into my more "feminine" side. My advice: find a balance.

[rockmom]

i was always a tomboy but I am not a guy trapped in a girls body. I'm petite and extremely feminine and girly looking. I enjoy being active, competitive, and the rush of air and adrenaline. I don't think those are things that only guys can appreciate. id rather be out playing basketball or going to a car show with my 12 year old then sitting around waiting for nail polish to dry. and its hard to play bball in a dress lol. maybe it has something to do with growing up with a bunch of guys but I would just rather be doing something active, fun. maybe guys like a fun girl, one that can be ready to go in 10 mins, one that doesn't mind getting dirty. I don't know.

[Anonymous]

Honestly the "Good" guys usually keep things closer to our selves and some don't like opening up. When we see "girly girls" I think we get intimidated if we are really attractive them and think that they have to be out of our league. Also some guys that are maybe a little "nerdy" don't want to expose their obsession be it video games or reading because they feel embarrassed. I know when I got the guts to talk to or ask out a "girly girl", I was often turned down or ignored because they didn't like the things I did and just went back to putting on makeup or talking about fashion and things. Tomboys on the other hand can talk about things that guys do because they do the same things. they are also really chill and down to earth and aren't "synthetic". Not saying that "girly girls are but they often get really involved in objects or fantasies. I know several tomboys and all are very nice people who still hang out with girls but prefer guys. So overall guys just feel safer with tomboys because they can talk to them. If there is a guy that you like and is not a liar and a dirt bag you really just have to talk to him and get his attention and he will most likely talk to you. Trust me I'm one of those guys :)

[TheDigitalSaint]

If given the choice between a really girlie girl or a tomboy, I'd ditch the toyboy and pick the girlie girl. Heck, if I wanted to hang with the guys, I'd hang with the guys!

A girl that plays sports and stays active is attractive in its own right, but in my book, a healthy dose of the "girlie" side is what makes you desirable. I can appreciate all the time it takes to get ready for a night out on the town with a lady who wants to look her best for you. That's not a quick task!

You are also young. Guys at your age tend to be really immature and can't really appreciate your more feminine qualities often until they are more ready for a serious relationship. Just because the tomboys are snagging a lot of guys doesn't mean that they are in it for the long haul. A lot of tomboys I know are just activity partners when I feel like exploring the world.

My ideal girl is actually more girlie than tomboyish. If learn to play sports, exercise a bit or show me that you can have balance in your life without becoming a quasi-boy, that's really attractive! Don't ever change! :)

[Paullus]

No way you're gonna go with an Immature Girly Girl, rather than a Tomboy. But then Were looking for an equilibrium of the two. Not one or the other.

[TheDigitalSaint]

Just because a girl is "girlie" doesn't automatically make her immature. Some girlie girls are too high maint. for my tastes. Of course, balance is key. Seriously, a huge tomboy who doesn't have a softer side is a turnoff. I don't want to confusing dating my girl with hanging with the boys. :P

[Asker]

I like your answer but I think you misinterpreted the question. Read the update please.

[TheDigitalSaint]

Well, girlie girls can tend to be more emotional and a guy with less than honorable intentions can sense that and take advantage. The tomboys I know still are emotional at times, but generally less so. Regarding drama, when it has been in your relationship, who has started it? Are you the shy type? Do you have any other insecurities? There's more to a relationship than either being "girlie" or "tomboyish". If you focus on improving what attracts good guys, that should be your goal.

[WeaponZero]

Guys have a harder time relating to girls like you than they do the kinds of girls you talk about. They don't understand the things you enjoy talking about and, frankly, they don't care to learn. Why would I want a girl who always wanted to go on dates to places I would rather shoot myself than go to? Why would I want to go see a ballet with my girl when I could instead be with a girl who enjoyed going to the races with me? Why would I want to drag a girl someplace she doesn't want to go, where she will be miserable, so that I could have fun, only to have to return the favor to her someday, when I could just get involved with a girl who enjoyed going to the places I go and doing the things I do?

[Toreno]

That's not true at all. I'm a "nice guy" and I really love girly girls!
Actually, I'm not dating now because I didn't found a girly girls by here yet: all of them are tomboys.
I'm really like to rate a girly like you and, when I find her, I'll valorize her more than myself.
Nice girls are rare, and the guy that treats badly one of them is not a man.

[sparkdog]

Society has misled girls about guys. Guys are very simple. We just want someone who has similar interests as us. The perfect girl is a girl who’s into guys stuff, like sports, cars, video games, and motorcycles. A girly girl rejects all of those things. It’s hard to like someone you have nothing in common with.

[badger25]

You sound like the girl i might want to date

[adorkabletmtm]

I'm sure guys like and dislike aspects of both.