Sexuality vs masculinity issues

[Hoshi-Reed]

I am currently having a debate with a guy who thinks:

Enjoying receiving anal sex is gay, even if the sex partner is female and ALL men believe this(or should/are gay in denial)

Now I can't understand his logic because he still considers GIVING anal sex to a female a manly/heterosexual act.

Now how can a man believe:

Receiving a blow job is okay from a girl but gay from a guy.

Having anal sex to a female butt is okay, but gay if the butt is male.

They are all non-pro-creative/sodomy acts and the same sensation on the body, only the sex of the person differs.

Why are two acts split based on the sex of the partner but not the third?

Now I tried to psycho-analyse the person and thought it isn't an issue of sexuality, but his own perception of masculinity (he also feels a man shouldn't like/enjoy being tied up - it is a sexual kink to him regardless if it isn't an obsession/preferred as opposed to an occasional thing). I believe he has a trust/power/control/domination issue with regards to masculinity. He denies this however.

Is receiving anal sex a sexuality issue or a masculinity/trust/power one?

[cd-type]

Personally being of the submissive tendencies myself, I think it's all of the above, my dear! But, first with the power one, then the masculinity one, then trust followed by the sexuality of it? I see nothing wrong with this enjoyable behavior between two consenting adults, whether it is given by a Women to a man or man giving it to another man. I also, think that if a man is giving it to a Women (mainly as a first time for the female), he should ask if this would be acceptable to the Female before going forward.

Ms. Reed the man you mention in your letter seems to me to be little homo phobic of his own sexuality. Just my opinion. How can someone have an opinion if you've never experienced this type of behavior. It won't make you any more of less gay to have a dominate Female use you for her enjoyment as well as your own.

I hope this helps in any way to your puzzlement, Ms. Reed. I say, carry on with what makes you feel good and having that power over a man is a very strong one for some! Women rule!

[annwyl-cariad]

I can't see how the act of anal sex itself is an issue of sexuality, nor is the issue of bondage. Does he understand the concept of receiving anal sex from a female? It seems like people don't really get that it's possible, though obviously requiring a strap-on. And bondage. Well, being tied up is a common fantasy that knows no gender or sexuality boundaries.

I would agree with you on the issues of trust/power/etc. He's got masculinity and male heterosexuality all tied up (no pun intended) with power, and really those things don't have to go together at all. It sounds like a psychoanalysis of this guy would be fascinating! Freud would be having an absolute field day with him!

[cd-type]

It's, most definitively a sexual issue. So, too hell with all of the silly labels we place on each other for one reason or another. If it feels good, do it. Personally I enjoy receiving but, I guess that I am a little on the submissive side. I can be masculine or feminine! So what does this make me?...For this gentleman your referring too, Ms. Reed. I couldn't care less what he thinks of me!

[Grassyknoll]

Getting a blow job from a girl or giving anal sex to a girl is not the same as giving it to a guy, even in terms of sensation. There's a big difference between a girls butt and a man's butt. Women have wider hips, bigger, softer sexier butts.

Even inside the hole it is different, you can anally stimulate the prostate gland in men though you can't do it with a woman. I would personally never want to stick my dick in a man's butt, furthermore just seeing a man might hinder my erection.

I don't think it's gay at all for a man to receive anal sex, we have anal access to our prostates for a reason and I don't find men attractive but I find the prospect of a giant penis inside my butt rather exciting. I'd prefer a hot sexy dominatrix with a strap-on ( a 2 way so she gets pleasure also) and I'd be set. Do you women like giving anal sex? for those who've tried or fanatasize it.

[caramelcutieinla]

You don't find men attractive yet you find the major anatomical thing that seperates us from you "really exciting"? And a giant one no less? Time to kick down that closet door and emerge sweetheart...

[NotSoBad]

Well I'm not gay and with my last girl In the beginning I wanted to have anal sex. Well she never had it before and I teased her for a long time until she really wanted it. Then we took it slow and it felt good. Then after awhile she wanted it more and more. It began to become a little bit of a turn off. Why did she want anal so badly now? I mean I guess it felt good for her. But it was something I wanted to try as a guy but not something I would want to do every day.

[Bl0n6eguy]

how did you tease her into it?

[Anonymous]

His logic is internally consistent if one considers the following:

• Penetration of a female by a male is straight, no matter where.
• Penetration of a male is gay, regardless of whom does it.

This is the logic most men follow, and the logic I tend to associate with too. That doesn't mean the man is always on top, women are often on top, even during anal.

[Dchrls78104]

I don't know. I think anal intercourse is degrading.