Would you date an overweight girl at all (with a personality you like) and would it make a difference if she was (like me) in the process of losing weight...or is it simply not something you'd go for because you could never be attracted to an overweight girl?
Reason for asking: I didn't feel good about the way I looked / lived, but now; having lost all that weight I feel great about myself. Way more confident about flirting & Co even though I still have a LOT of work to do and most guys would probably still consider me fat.
*Edit: 163 lbs now :)
160 lbs now; slow but steady :-)
158 lbs...next update when I reach 144 lbs.
Not at 144 yet...but 154 after having hit a bit of a plateau. Big change in waist & co measurements though. tbc...
149.9 (1.0229449 pound-loss per week) - hope you all are doing good. any advice on dumbbell exercises - triceps? bingo wings suck, but the more weight I lose the harder it is to avoid them. you guys bothered by them?
Before after pic for those of you who asked. I hope the link works. 140.2 lbs
132.9 lbs - what would your first thought be if you saw a severely overweight person enter a McDonald's? Before I wouldn't allow myself to think about it, but now that I have lost all that weight I catch myself having "skinny folks thoughts" (even though I'm not skinny yet).
Might be because I'm over all the bullsh*t I told myself over the years (excuses, excuses, more excuses as to why I need sweets & such).
i mean, the thing is that guys are more visual people so we prefer a girl who is physically attractive. The issue here isn't dating but the idea of first attraction. Sure personality matters but you have to get to that step of finding out each others' personality and that requires an initial approach and the physical attraction is what creates that approach. So I guess what I'm saying is that, I probably wouldn't date an overweight girl. I apologize if that comes off as shallow.. But good luck on your weight loss! don't do it just to get guys. do it for your own health! :)
Maintaining proper weight and a good form / body certainly requires hard work whether someone has been obese or not.
You have been working hard on it and feeling good with the results is a great thing to happen. I'm sure all of us here are happy for you just as you are for yourself now.
I don't understand statistics and measurements that you have mentioned out here as I believe that the actual look of the person can be very different viz-a-viz the measurements and stats.
Coming to dating 'over weight girls' - for me I need to click with that girl and like her. When that happens I have obviously not looked at any other aspect since my liking her matters. So yes I will sure date the one as described in your question :)
BTW I became overweight and began gymming again 9 months ago after over 20 years since I had put on tremendous weight in the past 2 years that made me go instantly from atheletic to fat and today I'm back to being atheletic (and better :D). There are obviously tons of girls who come along to lose weight and what I've noticed is that not every girl looks good after she loses too much weight, it goes the contrary for some and actually yes. So watch how much you lose and where to stop :D
As of your problem of being 'fat' apart from health and mobility issues that can crop up owing to being over weight, you'll be surprised young lady to know the number of men who actually prefer larger women :)
Honestly, I don't think I would. I mean I'm simply not attracted to overweight women because I'm a slight fitness freak.
Once the weight is lost or at least a large amount of it was lost then id become more and more interested. I'm not exactly proud of it, but I am very superficial when it comes to starting a relationship with personality coming after.
By the way, congratulations on the progress. Really impressive. At your weight I wouldn't call you fat, 'chubby' would probably be the word of choice. Which is certainly better.
Best of wishes for the rest of yoyr journey, I hope you reach your goals. Just make sure not to overreach and lose too much, its not a good look.
First off a huge congratulations on the weight loss! That's awesome I'm sure it feels great. Keep it going!
And I have to say I absolutely would go for it because I am going for it now. While my girlfriend is not huge, by BMI scales she is overweight and I think she is beautiful. And pretty much everyone agrees with me. I could go on about her but that's not what this question is asking lol. A pretty face is way more important at the end of the day than a nice body.
But that's never an excuse to not be healthy. Of course stay healthy and try to get to the healthiest weight you can. Your confidence will only grow :)
Truthfully, no. I'm a health freak, gym 4-6 days a week, eat really clean. Working out saved my life at one point as well. The older I get the more I value a woman who takes care of her body, especially since many women use age as an excuse for being not fit as they get into their late 20s. All this said, I deeply respect you because you refused to continue being unhappy with your health and you're proactively doing something about it which separates you from many women and men for tha matter. I think the more in shape you get and the more work and heart you put into it, the more you'll come to value a fit male as well. Please don't stop working hard to lose weight, you'll get there soon, and while it may seem tough at times and that you've plateaued, keep pushing and the results in the end are worth it :)
This is one of those things I don't know how to really answer. I feel like I could totally date a bigger girl, especially if I liked their personality. However, despite what I consciously think I have ever only liked really skinny girls with small boobs and the gap between their legs. And I only have ever dated the latter as well.
So there are definitely guys who want some more to love, and guys who don't. I have just come to the conclusion that some people have types set in their brain that are nigh-inescapable.
As long as I'm still physically attracted to her enough, sure. There's a time when a girl is too big to be attracted to her any at all, but for me a lot of attraction is more than just physical. If there's enough physical attraction, and the rest of her is great, then yeah I would. It's hard to say what the limit is on a girl being too big because every girl carries weight differently and stuff.
I used to date a girl who was slim and then after a while she got fat because she suddenly starts eating a lot. I didn't dump her though and in my eyes she was still as attractive as when she was slim. I suppose if you really like someone weight doesn't really matter (though she did slim down a lot after that).
Personally I've seen some skinny dudes who are dating a girl twice their size. Recently my friend who used to be overweight back in high school married a really handsome guy. She has lost a lot of weight but still can be considered chubby. It's a good thing that you're trying to reduce your weight, being overweight is not an excuse to be lazy. Improving your appearance definitely can't hurt in the long run.
I wouldn't mind, I work out often but even I have body fat, and to me, a girl who has the right attitude, and a nice personality would make you blind to what's skin deep, she would demand you looked deeper and found what she was all about, and by then, you really wouldn't care how big she was, youve seen enough to want to know more already,x
Yes; you are very datable right now because you aren't giving up -you are taking action!
You are not a dreamer; you have ambitions and you see plans through. That's a REQUIREMENT for girls I date. I am sincerely happy for you.
I'm trying to go the other direction and gain weight (muscle) because I am kind of on the scrawny side. I feel like I am making some progress but have a looong way to go still. I probably won't see any results for another year or so because putting muscle on takes a long time.
First off, good work. Personally, I think women who are too skinny are not attractive looking and I find slightly over weight far more attractive. Wayy overweight or obese, well that's a different story.
I would date an overweight girl, if I found her attractive otherwise and she had an interesting loveable personality. I like a girl with curves (I won't lie). But I am just as attracted to skinny women too. I like all different body types. Perhaps 250 lbs for a girl who is 5 foot 2 may be a bit much for me, but 170 is no problem for me.
Actually, there's this one girl at my school (who many people would probably think she's 40 pounds overweight), but I think she's an absolutely gorgeous 10/10, one of the top 10 most beautiful women I've seen in my entire life.
I don't date overweight girls, but don't let my words get to you.
You need to think, losing weight, as a golden opportunity. You are climbing on a stair, and your goal is at the top. The more you shred the fat and lose the weight, the lighter you are, and you are able to climb the ladder faster, and soon enough! you will REACH your goal.
That goal is different for everybody else, it could be your perfect body, your dream guy, whatever it is.
Lots of guys are attracted to overweight girls (aka heavyset, fat, stocky girls). My girlfriends (one at a time) included overweight girls both fat and stocky. I remember one of my girlfriends in particular who was very short and very large (more fat than stocky) and who had high self esteem because she knew she was stronger than many guys including tall skinny guys like me (I stand 6-foot-1 and I weigh 135 pounds). One day, she boldly challenged me to a weightlifting contest to find out which one of us (HER? OR ME?) could lift a bigger, heavier barbell overhead. She stood only 4-foot-9 while she weighed 190 pounds (massive for her short stature) while I weighed 125 pounds (measly for my tall stature). At my apartment, there was a big, heavy, fully-loaded barbell set up on the floor. I had already tried to lift it over my head. I lifted it up from the floor but when I tried to lift it over my head, I COULDN'T EVEN GET IT ABOVE MY THIGHS! When she arrived, she lifted that barbell up from the floor and I watched her while she easily swung it up over her shoulders and then, while I continued to watch her, she easily lifted it over her head. I just stood there, STUNNED, and ALMOST IN DISBELIEF at what I just saw her do. I failed in front of her as well. Afterward, she and I stood in front of each other with her looking way up at me while I looked way down at her. I thought she would be turned off after she outlifted me but her strength being far superior to mine actually turned the both of us on. She and I began kissing each other tenderly while we were both caressing each other. However, it didn't advance beyond that because it was still early in our relationship. I was barechested so we noticed that I stood so much taller than she did that my nipples actually rose above her mouth!
Weight is just a number to me, and frankly I am very attracted to girls that are modestly chubby. If you look good despite your weight, respect yourself and make sure it doesn't affect your health I'd date someone like you no question xD
Personally I wouldn't date a girl who is overweight. I'm a fitness freak and our lifestyles would clash. I would however encourage her to live healthier and get her weight healthy. It's as much as a health problem as it is an attraction problem for me.
My ex was self conscious about her weight too. She was the one who pursued me, and once I saw how big her heart was, I also realized how physically beautiful she really was. Only shallow jerk-offs dis a girl based solely on her weight. Keep on keepin' on girl!
don't do it, even if you don't care what people think, it has bad effects on your self-esteem, plus you are also damaging her by lying to her, you don't want to be with someone unattractive neither she wants someone who is faking his attraction to her. It is an insecure act and it is foolish.
I'm personally not attracted to large girls. It makes me feel like the biggest ass because I'm fat myself (though, like you, I'm losing weight). But I learned you can't force yourself to be attracted to someone and if you do you'll end up unhappy. So I'm losing weight for health and to make me less of a hypocrite. Now, when it comes to dating overweight, it all depends. I have some overweight friends who are very attractive but they're just not very overweight. I'm having trouble describing it. I'm not gonna judge a girl based on her weight. She can weigh like 170 but if she doesn't look like it, then I obviously wouldn't know or care.
Glad you are getting healthier. But do that for yourself, not anyone else. I like the gym and playing sports so I have more in common with girls who share those interests. I'm usually attracted to petite girls. But I've been attracted to some women who weren't small. I think Adele is really pretty, plus she's talented which makes her even more attractive. Beyonce isn't really thin, she's hot though. Personality and talent can definitely make a girl more attractive.
im a bit pudgy as well...ive lost 10 lbs this ast month after making it my new years resoltuion to drop weight...i go through periods of time where I have lsot a lot and gain it back but this year I wanan go all the way and my current cirucmstances have actually allowed me to really focus on it and I'm doing well...i wish you well with your plans...but YES...i actually have found a lot of girls who are a bit heavier cute and pretty...i would love to have date/date many of them...and ia daccept her as she is but imt rying to loose weight too and since she wants to and its her goal id try to be really supportive...i think it'd be fun to have a girlfriend trying to loose weight at the same time I am..we could do it together and it might be good to have that support.
Depends on exactly HOW overweight she was/is. I wouldn't want to date a morbidly obese girl but overweight is fine. I am in the process of losing weight as well. It would be awesome to find a girl who is also doing that. Keep each other motivated.
With me I look at it as I have been taking care of myself and working on losing weight so why would I want someone who doesn't? Similar example: I have a full time job and have goals in life so why would I want to date a girl who was too lazy to get a job and has no ambition in life?
Congats on the weight loss. I am in a similar situation. I was 5'7 250lbs and now I am 185lbs a year later. I have learned that I actually enjoy running and I am going to be in a mini marathon in May. Still working on it also. Great job and keep it up!
I think I'm done dating over-weight girls. I've dated two or three, and they're always so insecure and mistrusting that I end up breaking up with them. I'm tired of having my motives questioned. I'm tired of walking on egg-shells around insecurities I do nothing by try to sooth. I'm tired of being treated like garbage. Over-weight girls are very unappreciative and hostile beings in my experience. No desire to date that.
i have but now I wouldnt. id prefer girls that are healthy and look after their bodies. as long as I knew she was seriously trying to get healthy again id date her. as I've had weight problems as well. congrats on the good work keep it up. I was about 255 last year iam 192 right now. I still got some work to do but I feel great. it really is an uphill battle but its worth it for the end result
I loved this! I am 5 ft 2 and170 lbs now. I HATE it. I'm pretty in the face, but I carry everything in my abd. I joined CrossFit and I'm working my way down... but it feels so slow! I'm so sad. I randomly came across this post and it seems so inspirational. Seems like there are mixed feelings about whether or not a guy would be attracted. Idk, I'm pretty confident... I used to be 143 lbs and I was happy-ish then... and then I moved home (worst idea ever). In college, I could maintain my weight because I picked what I ate there. Here, my mom comments on everything and cooks super unhealthy foods! I'm so frustrated. Thanks for this though. Good luck to you! Are you still working at it?