Do you care if your girl/boyfriend is smarter than you?

like not by a lot but more than what would be close, like its apparent.

This question has a poll!

  • Vote A I'm a guy, I like her smarter than me
  • Vote B I'm a guy, I don't like when she is smarter than me
  • Vote C I'm a girl, I like him smarter than me
  • Vote D I'm a girl, I don't like when he is smarter than me
  • Vote E I really don't care unless they are calling me stupid
Updates:
im not saying that she/he is stupid. just smarter or closer to ur intelligence level
its interesting that the people who did not choose E mostly prefer a smarter significant other
 

What's Your Opinion?

0/2000

What Girls Said 17

What Guys Said 14

  • i don't like being "the smart one" in the relationship so I said C but I really like it when we are both marter than each other in different ways. that way no one is ultamently smarter than the other at everything

  • Honestly, I feel like intelligence is falsely measured by a lot of people- theyre' are so many different kinds. I could not date someone who didn't respect my areas of intelligence, but at the same time, I tend to be attracted to guys who complement rather than match them all the time. I like a guy who can challenge my mind and teach me new thins, and I like a guy who is secure enough to admit that I'm better at some things and let me teach him. I'm not great at math or working with my hands, but I'm a really great cook and a good writer- any guy I date has to be ok with both sides of me. The ideal guy would hare some intelligence areas and be good at some of the things that I'm not- then I'd never be bored!

  • I don't think like he should be letteraly smarter than me " which I doubt :-p "..

    I just like a smart guy ! that knows what he want, knows how to express his thoughts & has a big view of life :-)

  • I love it when my boyfriend is on my level or close to it... I'm quite smart (Graduated 10th in my class of 380-something) and I find that having an intelligent guy is great because I can have deep conversations with him... So close to, plus or minus some, my level is awesome. I can't really take a guy who I can't have at least some sort of intelligent conversation with.

  • In my opinion, smart is the new sexy.

  • I chose E But I would say the people I usually like are slightly less smart then me or totally smarter than me, I usually don't like people on the same level for some reason.

    • Yeah, it's wierd.

    • Thats really interusting I wonder why

  • I got involved with someone who was very intelligent.. That is what had attracted me to him. I was sick of hanging out with idiots and I did not think I was ever going ot meet someone who was smart and attractive... Well he was, and he was... He really liked me a lot too. Just like everyone else he thought I was really smart... His expectation made me doubt everything I said... He never said anything disparaging, as a matter of fact he hung on every word I said. I just was too overwhelmed with how I felt emotionally and intellectually towards him... I just gradually pulled away and he ended up getting really hurt and loosing trust. It took me two years to get him to talk to me and half that time I could not talk to him... If I could have realized how important it is to just hear what the person is saying and let your spirit guide your intelligence, I might have been able to experience love for even a little while... I got so hung up on everyones expectations, that I completely missed the fact that there was a human being who wanted to be with me and get to know me - not read me. I think if we just talked and each concentrated on our own work and shared some things, we could have learnt A LOT... I think our intelligence was pretty equal it just manifest in different ways... The ironic thing is that I was the one who was more out going and closed up... He supposed to be reserved , and he really surprised me in the beginning , he just wanted to know about anything... I was so concerned with calibre of discussion, I did not even ask him where he was born, or if he liked his siblings or even if his parents liked each other. I think when people meet the important thing is to value the person, not as an idea as an act really, like people are experiences themselves and then you have an experience with an experience... One of the most exotic, fascinating places to travel ,is inside some ones mind - especially if you love them.

    • "One of the most exotic, fascinating places to travel ,is inside some ones mind"

      i looooooove this quote like oh my god! it is sooooo true

  • I have a hard time not being equal to my husband. He doesn't feel he married down... he just views it as a difference in excellence (he is better at retaining aural information or information he has read and he is better with logic, whereas I am better with visual learning and making creative art); however, it is hard for me to share his view when he seems to be so much better than I. I am not uneducated, or unintelligent, but I definitely *feel* less intelligent than he... and yes, it bothers me... makes me feel like maybe he settled. Yay, insecurity! :D For the most part we just enjoy each other for who we are and try not to dwell too much on our differences (sine we have so much in common). I definitely look up to him though :) it's kind of nice learning from him and growing with him. I think we make one another better... and in the end, I suppose that is all that matters.


    Where he is deficient, I excel and vice versa - we lift one another up where we need it :D


    hope that helps :)

  • i like intellectual guys who can hold conversations and are deep thinkers. book-smart and street-smart. BUT he must nt push his intellect on me and think he's high and lofty and try and use that to humiliate and dominate me. I won't stand for a guy like that.

    • Heh. I'm no older than u. I'm 20 gg on 21. :) yeah its RARE to meet people like that (maybe that's why I'm always single haha), most people are booksmart and don't have EQ. and are street smart but don't hold conversations well. I guess its good to have a ittle bit of both. if I need to choose, I would rather a street smart guy with intellect and who likes what he does in sch, and gets a decent education out of it. (:

    • For me I have yet to come by anybody who is book and street smart maybe it is because I am still young(19) but in most cases for me in youth people get smart at school and don't really get the street smart skills where as most people I noe are/ were soso in school and have really um good? street smarts. =]

  • I personally like the guy with a brain and something to say --I wouldn't say smarter but smart in areas I'm not like good in (ie. Chemistry or Cars, or other mechanics stuff)


    I've had study groups and Helped a few guy friends on like English paper and math homework and I guess in the end they had a thing for me because they thought I was smart --but I didn't like them..


    but I guess in general some girls perfer their b/fs to be a tad bit more intelligence in other fields because as girls who really wants a not so smart boyfriend? and as for girls if the boyfriend is like super smart or rubs it off on you or make you feel like dirt then ehh no pt in having a a cocky boyfriend floating around right?

    • Thanks :)

      but not to say that I want a boyfriend that's way smarter then me -- It would like to have one that sees me and him as equal and we both share equal intelligence and thus we can both bounce ideas of of each other.

    • Great answer I agree with all of it! =]

  • I haven't come across many people who I felt I was smarter than or who were smarter than me. There are things I know that others don't, and there are things other people know that I don't. So I don't want to be more or less intelligent than a guy, I want there to be a balance.

  • i must say I do need someone to have intelligent convos with.

  • i'm smarter than my boyfriend in areas such as vocabulary, foreign languages, and anatomy. my bf's smarter in areas such as math and science.

    so we have equal intelligence, but we both strive in different areas, so we can each feel smarter at certain times, and learn something from the other at certain times.

  • I don't care if the person I am with is smarter then me, it won't change anything unless he is putting me down for my own intelligence.

  • I'm fairly intelligent and I've noticed that some people have an ego thing about "being the smart one." Someone who is so much less intelligent that we can't carry on a conversation is unappealing, yet someone who is constantly trying to prove he is smarter than me is unappealing as well.


    Personally, I love clever guys because we have a similar sense of humor and catch on to the same quirky comedy of life. I also love guys who are smart in a different way than I am, such as mechanically.

  • I think it depends on the person. Some guys have got off on the fact I'm cleverer than them whereas others have been a bit bemused and put off by it. Think it got to my ex, as he used to call me google. He obviously thought I was just some dumb blonde at first, think he got more than he bargained for in the end when he found out I've got a masters degree!

    • Hehe great job with ur masters =]

  • i like him to be equal or brighter as it is better for having convosations with and makes life more interesting

  • Selected as most helpful

    Both sides have their benefits, if a woman is less intelliegent than me I can be more "unpredicatable" and surprise her in more unique ways, and flatter her more easily and not have to worry about her viewing my intelligence negetively. And if she's more intelligent than me and doesn't mind, then I have an opportunity to expand my knowledge and try to rise to the occasion.


    On the down sides of both however... being more intelligent (if it's too much so) than the people you surround myself with, I constantly feel misunderstood, and alone trapped in my own mind and that I have to dumb down most of what I say out of not wanting the other to get confused or lost in what I said... that's how it was in my first relaionship so I can honestly say it really sucks, she was intelligent in the ways that just weren't what I needed. Though not the same, I've had some incredible friends that blew me out of the water when it came to intellectual conversations, I was always worried that they might be feeling how I felt when I had to talk to people who weren't as intelligent as me, and I always had to stretch my mind to grasp much of what they said, but we got along very well and since I have the utmost admiration for intelligence I always valued those sort of relationships greatly.


    Over all I'd say a balance is best for a relationship that way it's not about intellectual superiority or inferiority and both parties can feel stimulated when they converse, and yet feel as though there's more room for improvement without having one or the other feeling poorly about not understanding something. To me it goes without saying that relationships should be founded on common interests and common ground.


    Best of luck to you and hope this answer helps.

    • And if you're honest, sincere and treat women well, I wish you the best of luck in finding a serious relationship with someone that has looks and brains, not just to show you what I mean, but so you can find someone incredible to be happy with. Best of luck and wishes to you.

    • Type, because I'm far more interested in intellectual stimulation, and the excitment of going out and doing new things, and finding creative ways to express my feelings when I'm in a relationship, maintaining a self-image is only part of it for me. Not all gorgeous women are just into looks, that's part of what makes being with tones that aren't that much more meaningful and special. Taking care of one's self-image doesn't hurt, and finding real love is important, more so than appearance,

    • The luck doesn't have to apply to finding a relationship, it was just luck in general, because can't everyone use a little more luck in their lives? Glad you liked my answer, and you're welcome.


      And SilentG, that can be true, but only if you're aiming too far over her head and she doesn't have as a romantic personality (at least in my case) I have been with women that weren't as intelligent as me, it's more about personality though, if she has an ugly/shallow personality then she's not my

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  • I like her about the same as me I suppose. My last ex was like REALLY REALLY dumb, you wouldn't believe some of the questions she asked me. And yet another one of my exes got like all A's, was better at guitar than me, better artist than me, and was just a lot more academic/well read that it sort of made me feel weird I guess. Either way, they both loved me all the same and I had fun with them both. As a preference though? I like her just about the same level as me.

  • my girlfriend is smarter than me, well she knows more book stuff than me, also she gets paid more than me but it doesn't really matter for us.

  • On reflection, I'd like her to be about the same intelligence level, or smarter.

    That way you can talk afterwards. ;-)


    Ted

  • I prefer (and did choose) one that's my equal.

    • When I was at the uni I dumped a nice girl because she was irritatingly superficial and dumb. (she was studying too, I don't know if she graduated)

  • Every girl I've been attracted to has been almost as smart or smarter than I am. Intellect is sexy. Just don't let it go to your head.


    Intelligent girls allow for intelligent conversations. Without intelligence, you get mindless drivel. Mindless drivel gets boring rather quickly.

    • Not intelligent does not equal "mindless drivel"

      ther is a middle ground

  • i don't really believe in stupid and smart so no. My last girlfriend could destroy me in school stuff. (some guy wrote that book about that. and that politician did that.)


    While I would make her look stupid when it came to everyday stuff. Or musical theories. I mean. She was smart in her way. I was smart in my way.


    I mean I have a friend that while we watched a movie where a guy with cancer kissed a girl. He went omg she's stupid. He thought cancer could spread to him like aids. Yeah I laughed my ass off. But the guy can tear apart a whole car and put it together in an hour- 2 if he has to explain what every part does-.

    So nah. . . I don't think anyones stupid. They just lack info on certain topics. If school stuff makes you smart. I'm proud to say I'm stupid ass **** :D

    • Haha yeah your right about that one ;)

    • "He thought cancer could spread to him like aids" lmao

      he seems interusting =] haha


      "I don't think anyones stupid. They just lack info on certain topics"

      i agree completly like omg magority of people don't noe everything and will run in to many people that do things better than them

      in my opinion many people think mechanics are people of lesser intellegence and yet they take their cars to them and get ripped off all the time lol

  • I chose E. I don't care if she's smarter than me, as long as she doesn't call me stupid.

  • having a smart girl by your side is more important than anyone would think, smart girls are more loyal cause the stupid ones get laid much easier while in a relationship... furthermore, a smart girl would have chosen you depending on your unique qualities, then went on with you in a serious manner.


    A smart girl as well knows how to entertain you, is creative usually and have a lot more to offer than her looks or sex. And that's what matters. A smart girl won't get bored with you easily cause she understands you and knows how to get in deep with you, it's never on your own if you're with a girl or a woman that puts effort in that relationship just as much as you do.


    Last but not least, a smart girl will save your a** instead of getting you into trouble like what dumb girls do everyday.


    and remember, looks don't last, brains do, brains can change looks and get you what you want, looks can't make you smart.

    • Im female my ex was a moron and ugly

      im book stupid street smart, I am wise and mature for my age, I do wish I was better in school


      i took ur answer the wrong way thinking you were generalizing attractive women as idiots which is not always true, I also felt like you were making fun of stupid women because (this is how I took it) they are to stupid to have a come back. that's what I thot you wer doing sorry you came off like that.

      thanks for answering my question =]

    • "stupid ones get laid much easier " Not true: they replace intelligence by being streetwise or by blindly following rigid little rules.

    • She probably thinks I dumped her because she didn't want sex and had no boobs. Sorry, but much better than saying her "sorry, dear, but you're really too superficial for me." (I could have lived without the boobs, NOT without the brains. The sex she would have given anyway, just a number of months later, morals or no: high morals don't last, neither do perky boobs)

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  • I don't mind either way as long as they have SOME brains. I used to date a girl who was the literal definition of a blonde...oh my god...every thing I said I had to explain it, even from a simple "Hows you" (just silly way id say "how are you" shed get confused on that.

  • I think having a girl smarter then me would be interesting. I'm yet to find one tho, I don't have a problem sharing what I know.

    • Lol thanx, its pretty deep to me

    • I like ur gag name =]

  • well basicaly guys who are smart would end up with girls who are a little dumb( no ofenes) and this is true about girls .

    • I agree maybe a nicer way to say a little dumb is of lesser intelligence or not as smart

  • Not in the slightest. If she's smarter than me, than I'm happy to be dating someone so smart. If I'm smarter than her, it won't make much of a difference either.

  • I prefer girls who are more sophisticated than I am, but a smart person who has an ego about being smart is really worse company than a dumb person is. You know the type.

    • "yes, but I'm not really an ant, so I understand your suspicion."


      you made me lol :)

    • Some things you only talk about to some people.

    • Haha that's good but you would have to ba a really strong ant to push the keys board. so my boyfriend was in the army in 2002-2008 and ya it really makes him quiet to talk about. is that normal?

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