We never go out on dates anymore?

[Anonymous]

Together for 1 year but we never go out on dates anymore, usually just stay home?

We are both grad students so neither of us have a lot of money or time, but when we first started dating we went out on a date every week. Now we often hang out at home.

My boyfriend is under a lot of stress right now, so I was thinking maybe I should suggest taking him out to dinner and then to a movie or something this weekend.

I would like to be taken out sometime too, but do you think he would get the idea by me treating him or is it better to directly mention this?

[bunnahies]

me a my boyfriend do that too :( I like it, its cozy/relaxing and all...but can we at least go out for a walk? I don't want to lay in bed all day long! I need fresh air! we can go bike riding, play catch, go out for a walk/run, anything! it doesn't always have to be about going out on "dates" neither of us have money so I shouldn't expect him to pay for me, if I can't even pay for him. its only fair :( I can complain if I had money and I chose not to go out lol

i usually just him straight out that I want to go out :O even if he said he's too tired, at least I tried! :/

[Anonymous]

i feel like your answer is in your own question, you're in grad school, stress, its a difficult time in life to figure out your career and income and stuff, I'm in that phase too...you just don't have energy to think about love dating and stuff, I have no job no money right now its really hard

i think you should stay by your boyfriend and just be supportive show him you love him no matter what...also talk to him about it ask him if you can take him out for a treat or may be walk along the park, something simple, may be have an autumn picnic in the park :)

[Anonymous]

I think men could be oblivious sometimes and because he is under a lot of stress, he is thinking about other things, so it's better if you directly mention this instead of bouncing around the topic. I feel to keep a relationship alive, going on dates as you used to is a great way to do that. Keep in mind that yes, money makes the world go around but you can have dates that cost close to nothing, for example, taking a walk. It'll give you guys time to talk and maybe do it at night so it's more romantic and has a date feel.

[kheserthorpe]

I'd ask him if he'd enjoy it.

And at some point, maybe not THIS week if he's super stressed, but soon, have a serious discussion about what you both enjoy, what makes you feel connected, what makes you feel loved, what relaxes you. Because you don't actually know what relaxes him, and he doesn't know what relaxes you.

A date _might_ help him clear his head. Its certainly _nice_. But the average guy probably gets more relaxation, stress relief and feeling loved from a bj initiated by you. Maybe not him, but that would be _common_.

[john5246]

I think it's best to find a guy who has the time and money to take you out. If I was him and I was under stress and stuggling financially I'd break up with my girlfriend. Girls need a guy who has enough money all the time to take them out on dates, and I wouldn't want to hold her back from having good dates just because I'm too busy or don't want to spend too much money.

[jadejess]

I don't think this is true. I much prefer to hang out at home and relax with my boyfriend than go out. I don't think it's necessary for him to spend on me for us to have a good time. Maybe I'm not a normal girl...

[musicbrain5]

Wow. Not every girl is a gold digger. Also, I would get sick of going out all the time - I'd much rather stay in and get take out and beer or something. And maybe watch a movie. Much cheaper that way!

[littleM]

this right here is total bullsh!t ... it really isn't about the money, some of the best dates are free or close to it.

[john5246]

that sounds sweet but girls want to go out, if you don't do it they'll leave you for someone who will take them out and entertain them

[just_me5]

Ha! My man and I don't go out much either. We share the costs of dates. When I'm sick of staying home I just bluntly say 'It's time for a date night'! Ironically we were supposed to go out this past weekend and when he got home from work I didn't feel like it. We rented movies, got some beer and pizza, and stayed in our pjs - it was one of the best dates I had!

Suggestion - tell him how you feel. :-)

[jadejess]

Personally, I prefer to stay at home a lot and relax with my boyfriend and he usually prefers that as well. But anytime we do want to go out, one of us just suggests it. So yeah, just talk to him about it. Take him out and let him know that you're treating him because you know he's stressed out and you want to help him relax - hopefully he'll get the hint and the next time you're stressing over grades or work or something, he'll do the same for you.

[AmberChick]

I thind that's a good idea if you suggest it. You can also ask him how come you guys haven't gone on dates anymore? If he cares about you he will remember the conversation, take it seriously, and then hopefully plan something for the two of you. If not suggest an outing yourself.

[Tanisha69]

Wow...once a guy stop taking me out, he's kicked 2 the curb. in a lt relationship you don't EVER want to lose the romance and going out on dates. if you do best end the relationship cause the spark is GONE GIRL