After Months of Chasing Me... Ex Rejects Me?

Okay, so this is kind of a lot of drama... Me and my ex broke up about 7 months ago for several reasons, one of which was he was moving overseas for a year (and we'd already been long distance for 1 year of the 3 we'd dated.)

For 3 months, we couldn't stop contacting each other... but almost all we did would be to fight. Finally, we seemed to get to a decent friendship place. A month later I met a really sweet guy and we started casually dating.

The whole 4 months we'd been broken up, my ex had been complaining about all these reasons he wouldn't date me again, but he still "cared so much and images me as the mother of his future children." Now that I was dating the guy, suddenly my ex wanted to get back together.

I tried to break off contact a couple of times, but I realize now I was still really into my ex... It was my big mistake, and after about 2 months, me and the new guy ended things.

In the last month, I've really been trying to repair things with the ex. He'll be back within 2 hours of me in about 3 months. But all of a sudden... He's started pushing me away. He always has some excuse why he can't talk to me... too tired, mostly... and if I get angry, he just says," I'm sorry... what else do you want me to do?" If I tell him... he says he'll do that, because he cares so much, I'm the girl for him... and then he doesn't do it.

If I break off contact... he freaks, and starts telling our friends about how much he loves me and that I "never gave him a chance."

What the heck is going on?!

PS: He also says things like "he doesn't deserve me" and that he's a "bad gamble" for me (he's gonna move back home, jobless, and live in his parents' basement for a few months...) If he thinks I'm so great, why doesn't he try to stay with me?


Most Helpful Guy

  • he loves you, I'm kind of in this situation right ex is currently dating someone and has been for about a little over a month...we broke up in december...i begged her back, tried showing her I wouldn't take her for granted as I did before, tried to explain that thered be no more stress with fights, we'd just simply figure it out maturly...i know not all of it was my fault but I still wanted to work at it...we can't do much about it right now, she's with this guy because she's lonely, she wanted someone, she didn't want to deal with the stress of me telling her that she's beautiful and stuff and then THINK I'm going out telling every girl they are...she has 2 jobs as I do, school, neither of us need addition stress of trying to work at us right now so basically we are on a break and both understand if its meant to be it will be, fate won't let us separate...but whatever enough of me lol

    i can tell you right now, if I were in your mans position...which I've basically said everything he's said to you to my be scared as sh* you were when you guys first broke obviously are in love with him but were too afraid to repeat what had already ahppened and made you upset so you dated this guy to try and get him off your mind and to try and see if the grass is greener and if to really decide ho wyou FEEL about your ex...hes probably scared that if he gets back with you which he obviously want to, that you'll end it and start dating again, he doesn't want to be hurt like he was after the break up again maybe? I'm just guessing here...try proving to him that he's teh one you feel good around, taht you want to WORK at your relationship, which this will take time...also you need to move on from the past...sure its going to be there, but you cannot FORGIVE someone without MOVING ON with what happened before...that isn't forgivness - to say I forgive you for what happened, then bring it back up a month or so in the future, that isn't what forgivness is, understand that, you need to forget about it and understand it happened for a reason...TO MAKE YOU BOTH HAPPIER AND REALIZE HOW MUCH YOU MEAN TO ONE ANOTHER!

    just try reassuring him you want to be with him, espcially when he comes home, make him feel welcome, understand he's been stressed over seas and probably cannot wait to see you (what a suprise it'd be to see you at the airport)

    please take your time with this, think why you want him back, why you want to be in a relationship with him again, if you both can be mature to understand fights happen, make up, sometimes let him win and he should sometimes let you win, it shouldnt be difficult...every relationships has their ups and was the turtle that won the race NOT the rabbit...i hope this helps and I hope I didn't ramble on...i wish you the best of luck, let me know if I can help you any more... :) good luck


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What Guys Said 1

  • it sounds like he still loves you and wants to be with you but has a funny way of showing it. long distance is hard when he gets bak you guys will work out if its meant to be. =]


What Girls Said 1

  • Sounds like games to me, wants you when he "feels" like it, or when he isn't "tired". Lame, excuses, I've heard that crap before. I don't know lady, I think honestly, you should move on. Break contact for a bit, if he's into you and he gets upset that you broke contact, then I would just say, well I thought you were too "tired". You know.. he can't just drag you around like he has been, its not fair to YOU. Also, what about breaking things off, until he moves back, and give it a chance when you honestly can? Or.. Maybe he really is just tired and with long distance and everything, who knows what he's up too. Working long days? I don't know his personal situation. You have to honestly believe that he is being honest about being tired, or let it go already.


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