He says I'm trying too hard, what does that mean?

Me and my ex have starting talking again after realising things, and we are just seeing how things work out. We had many months of space apart in the time I changed and grew up, and I didn't want to lose him so I fought for him, he's real important to me. As he was my bestfriend prior to dating, so we are friends at the moment but it's more than friends.. but we aren't dating as it's not the right time and we have circumstances. We just want to get to know one another againand start afresh. We have a really good bond and a deep connection, and things seem to be going well. We are just enjoying each other's company. He flirts with me and talks to me more than a friend. I still love him but he told me he only likes me. I'm the type to show someone I care by making extra effort and really trying because it just makes me happy knowing I've made someone else happy. I wanted to do a nice gesture for him and he was shouting saying I'm only doing that so he could want me and chase me. Which is so so wrong, I have always been this way and I don't believe in giving and receiving, I just think it's nice to give to people from the heart. I feel like he just think I'm this bad person and doesn't understand my intentions. So I expressed how I felt and he told me that I try too hard.
What am I supposed to do? What does that mean? What are ways I can stop trying?


Most Helpful Guy

  • trying to show him how much you care about him... Is that too much or inappropriate?
    If you're making more effort and changing yourself for someone who sees what you're doing too much harder for him... then you better give yourself space.

    I think he didn't realize that relationship well, so what would happen is a friendship with benefits until he realizes that relationship or knows what he wants.

    sorry, but the real relationship is to be your nature, not make an effort to make others change their opinion about you.

    Good luck...


Most Helpful Girl

  • you're asking for ways on how to stop trying? can u see how ridiculous that is? stop trying means do nothing more. he is just not into you.

    • When I spoke to him about it, he just said that I'm making too much effort and that he really likes me but wants to take it slow because of the past. So that's why I'm asking

    • I don't mean that I'll stop trying, I just meant to say not as hard

    • show him your strong confident side who doesn't need him. that's what to do.

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What Guys Said 2

  • Well if you love him and he says he only likes you... but flirts with you then that sounds a lot like using somebody... I would just watch out for that... trust me people do change... and it always the most unexpected person that changes... but he just may not be into you anymore like he used to... trust me people change...

  • you are too clingly.


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