Is it okay to break up with someone right before Christmas?

[Anonymous]

I want out, but want to wait until after finals for both of our sakes, but this would mean I'd be breaking up with him a week before Christmas. I don't want to ruin his holidays or look like I couldn't be bothered with buying him a present, but at the same time, I don't want to get a nice gift from him only for him to find out later that I was contemplating breaking up with him. If you were the boyfriend, which do you think you would prefer?

[selfishstars]

I can understand how this would be a tough situation:

1. You don't want to break up with him before/during exams because that could affect his school performance.

2. You don't want to break up with him just before Christmas, because you don't want him to buy you a nice gift, or for his holidays to be "ruined".

It's also hard to know what will happen in the future and when an opportune time might come. I knew a guy who was very unhappy in his relationship and wanted to end things, but his girlfriend had a very long string of bad luck that made him feel like there wasn't a good time to break up (her dog died, her dad committed suicide, and various other things). He ended up staying in a bad relationship for over a year longer than he had wanted to.

I don't really have an answer, but I suppose I would want to consider how long you've been together/how serious your relationship is (which might affect how badly he takes the news; or whether he'd buy you an expensive gift or an "average" gift if you waited until after Christmas); also, does he have any idea that a break-up might be in the future (i.e. has your relationship been rocky lately? Has it been something the two of you have discussed at all?), since that may also affect his reaction to the news.

[kristen_k7]

I would wait til after Christmas. This is coming from someone who has been broken up with before Christmas and it completely ruined my holiday. Not just for me but for my family too because I was such a downer the whole time. If you can please wait.

[Dotcomperson]

Hi. There are rules basic to every society regarding decency and generally being nice to others. For example, you are not allowed to serve someone with court papers (divorce) on Xmas or it's eve in most western countries. You can avoid that by breaking off in advance of the holidays, but that doesn't make it any less difficult on your boyfriend. The stats have shown that many het dumped ahead of holidays, and this is unfortunate in my opinion. I think we should all wait until the holidays are over to break off with our (un)loved ones and try not ruin holidays for them.

[randyc]

This may sound rude but, you need to break up with him ASAP. It hurts more when you stay with somebody and don't have feelings for them anymore..

[Anonymous]

If I was broken up with after Christmas, then I would feel like she kept me as long as she did, just to get a present out of me. Women dump their boyfriends right after Valentines day for that very reason.

[informationplease]

well are you contemplating on breakin up with him or are you going to break up with him?

[Asker]

I'm seriously contemplating. Maybe a 7/10 on the scale of sureness.

[Kingofdastrip]

Ya I had to break up with my girlfriend its hard its best to get it over with as quick as possible