My boyfriend had a friends with benefits after we broke up and then he wanted me back, but why?

Damask
My boyfriend (25) and I (21) dated for about 8 months, it was a LDR. He came to see me in the summer, and we had a bad fight and broke up three days after he came to visit.

He spent his visit getting drunk and high, shit talking me with his friends and also got into a no strings attached with a girl who was nothing like me (23). She’s a size L, brown nappy hair and a reckless, shallow person who just got of a bad relationship. (I thought maybe because I was his “dream girl”, curvy, petite and a redhead, he wouldn’t settle for anyone other than his type but when it comes to sex I guess guys just don’t care.) They slept together more than we did. But of course she caught feelings because they went on dates, did things we were supposed to do and she begged him for a real relationship.

But he said no, that he missed me and couldn’t be in a relationship with her and that he was going to get me back. She then blocked me on all social media and told him “he makes stupid decisions” and went on a shit talk rant to all their mutual friends which made them hate him. He reached out to me three months after we broke up and gave me the whole “I miss you and I made a huge mistake” lecture and I decided to give it another chance.

I just don’t understand it at all. I could get a one night stand, but he was practically in a relationship with this girl. And what makes things worse is he still wants to be friends with this girl.

I do love him, but I just feel like he doesn’t love me the same. A one night stand is one thing, but nobody has experienced this situation. He broke his back to get me back and spent so much money to come see me again. So I just don’t know, it’s hard to just look past it. Is there any coming back from this? I want to. I think therapy would help. The chemistry is still there, I feel like I’m letting my insecurities and the pain I felt hold me back. What can I do to see if it’s worth it? Has anyone ever gone through something like this?
My boyfriend had a friends with benefits after we broke up and then he wanted me back, but why?
9 Opinion