Being in love with this guy is driving me insane?

Anonymous
I’ve never been in love before. This is the first man I’ve ever been in love with to this degree. It’s only been a month and I’m completely and utterly infatuated with him. If he asked to marry me tomorrow, I wouldn’t hesitate a second and it would probably make me the happiest girl alive. Its a great feeling being in love with someone as he brings happiness into my life I’ve never felt before. However, I can’t bear the feeling that I’ll lose him and won’t be able to take it. I can’t bear thinking about the fact that he may not love me the same way I do and I’m just being used and taken advantage of. I hate checking my phone 10 times a day to see if he’s contacted me after days upon days of ignoring me. I can’t bear the feeling of thinking he’s not interested in me when he’s left me on read. I can’t take the mind games. He’s much older than me, and I can’t help but feel he won’t be able to take me seriously or have a committed relationship with me. I like him genuinely. And all I want is him. It’s driving me insane, destroying my peace, consuming my energy, and making me lose focus of everything. I can’t let him go. And I hate that I’m this mad about him. It’s not fair. Any advice?
Being in love with this guy is driving me insane?
Updates:
9 mo
What hurts even more is that he’s everything I’ve ever wanted: stunningly good looking, charming, charismatic, sweet, sensitive, confident, funny, affectionate, loving... Ugh he just drives me insane. I need advice please help me. I hate being in love and love it at the same time.
9 mo
Bump this: he’s been talking to me for a little over a month, but only tends to text, call and follow up on me like once a week. Does that mean he’s not interested or just a bad texter? He’s 30, I’m 18 - he says I love you, care for you, you’re amazing sex aside etc. Always extremely passionate when he’s talking to me and so am I. What’s up with the mind games? by the way, I haven’t had sex with him we’ve just TALKED sexually.
Being in love with this guy is driving me insane?
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