If a guy is going to reach out to you after a break up how long would you say they typically wait and what would a guy even say when reaching out?
Do guys reach out to their ex after a breakup?
Depends on a lot of things. Did something fundamentally wrong happen in the relationship (cheating, abuse, lying about big things, etc). In those scenarios you break it off and done is done. No going back. Also did you give each other full closure on WHY this wouldn’t work out? It’s only fair to help someone improve their behavior. But some people are too conceited or sociopathic to do that.
I did reach out to one of my exes for a very long time after something really horrible happened (involving her) a few weeks after we split. She broke up with me but I actually wanted her to at the time. But when she dumped me we talked a bit and left seemingly had a mutual respect for each other. I didn’t protest or try to talk her out of it. I gave her a hug and said I understood.
But what happened a few weeks later absolutely devastated me. The way she REACTED about the incident is something not one molecule in my entire body predicted. I won’t say what happened but it was the most heinously callous and nasty reaction I’ve ever seen in a woman. It took me years to get over it.
I reached out to her because I really wanted only one thing: closure. Unfortunately being a man I don’t have the luxury of screaming at someone and going ballistic (although that’s what I wanted to do). She could easily and unfairly make up that I was a “threat” and society/law will always take her side.
I never got closure nor do I expect to hear from her for the rest of my life. Just something I have to manage. But I wouldn’t wish that entire experience on my worst enemy.
Most Helpful Opinions
-
I tried a few times, she ended it and I wasn't ready. After I stopped talking to her after 6 weeks, she hit me up. That went downhill fast, so I stopped again. 9 months later she reached out again. I kept it civil, but it was very "surface level". She still does every now and then, when she is lonely and bored and only wants to talk about herself. She said I shouldn't be a stranger.
No, I don't reach out to my ex. We have too many unresolved issues and she is no longer a part of my life and do not want her as a friend.
I don’t know.
If it’s just a short relationship, maybe they won’t contact you at all. If they do, they’re probably just after something.
If it’s a long term relationship, then I guess at some point they might want to know you’re ok, but there’s no time limit.
With a marriage ending, I think contact is sooner rather than later.
-
He never really reaches out to me, more towards the people we both associated with my family. They tell me about it. I don't really care though. 💁🏽♀️
What Girls & Guys Said
6
Opinion
27Opinion
-
Depends on a lot of factors. Who broke up with who, why they broke up and how long it has been since the break up.
My ex dumped me due to separation from each other under lockdown and having too many arguments over little things. Two months later, I did reach out to my ex and have had some purely friendly catch ups on text message, to the point she seemed like she may have been open to rekindling our relationship. Though, it may have just been in my head. She's now ghosted me and we haven't properly spoken in a couple of weeks, so I guess that is that. -
No, I find that pretty awkward. I’ve had a couple ex’s send me friend requests over Facebook but after I add them they don’t say or like or dislike anything. It’s like they just want to Facebook stalk me and that’s it.
So I deleted them and don’t add any others. I just find it a little awkward. -
Sometimes... It depends on how and why things ended with the girl. I had things end in a pretty nuclear and toxic way, but I don't have any ill will for my ex, and so I tried to reach out to her anyway. Unfortunately she has no interest in talking with me. She was decided that she only wanted to be friends, but I decided that I just couldn't only be friends with her. It seems like she's still pretty unhappy with me.
-
It really depends on many factors such as:
- Who initiated the breakup?
- How did the breakup happened? did one of them cheated?
- When was the breakup?
- How long was the relationship?
Generally speaking I would say "Yes" Exes comes back, when they realize that they have lost something precious. Because for some reason that we don't know, we as human beings we do not feel what we have unless we lose it. -
I don't think there is as typical time period for this its to hit and miss What I would say don't take this as an opportunity for him worm his way back The reason he is an x will still be there whether its something you can work on or not protect your heart from this
-
No. Why should I? I broke up with them for good reasons. I never have and I never will. Especially since I am in a healthy and happy relationship at the moment.
-
I have only had one and I cannot have another. This relationship is my only relationship since I was 15. If this ends I don’t even want another wtf I am happy alone.
-
I've only reach out to my ex to apoligize, which took a long time for me to just decide to do. I wanna say it took about two years if not a tad bit longer. One radom day it just started being on my conscience upon waking up.
-
Every single guy I’ve been with has reached out to me after the break up at some point. Usually 3 to 6 months after.
-
Depends entirely on how we broke up. If it was on good terms ill reach out when ready. If it wa on bad terms you will never see me again.
-
Often yes, usually after a week or so, although it depends how nasty the breakup was and whose idea it was. Generally we want the pussy so we're hoping to get some of that.
-
If it's their first relationship yes, but soon after they'll realise they are wasting their time.
-
i wrote a very long letter to the only ex i ever really loved about 5 years after we stopped talking. I'm sure she got it but i never heard back from her
-
Sometimes. In my case always even after ten years smh.
-
Sometimes. When my ex broke up with me he reached out a few weeks later (by email) to give me an update on how he's been. Didn't even ask how I was.
- 684 opinions shared on Break Up & Divorce topic.
What's the point honey? He's an EX. There's a reason things blew out, right? -
Not really especially if the relationship ended in bad terms which most do anyway. Plus guys are cautious as to who to trust.
-
We typically do it but I don't know if there's a specific time to consider it "normal", the last time I reached my ex it has been 2 years since we broke up
-
Aha. "Reaching out". Is that how you ridiculously naive ladies call it these days? :)
-
What do you mean "guys"? You think we all do the exactly same things?
Click "Show More" for your mentions
Most Helpful Opinion(mho) Rate.
Learn more
Learn more
Superb Opinion