Why do girls like to play matchmaker?

[Anonymous]

I've had 2 female friends that did this already, and it ended badly meaning didn't even come close to getting into a relationship with the guy and ruined the friendships. When things got sour, the guys would talk behind my back with my friends, and I hated having to hear about it. Afterward, it would be awkward having to be around my friend and him.

I don't get why girls want to do this knowing damn well that it's not going to work out. You can't put two people together, and magically create a relationship.

[BCRanger10]

I wouldn't say they know it's not going to work. In some cases, they may not take differences of personality or belief systems into account. In others, it's probably denial. In too many instances, people let their emotions rule their judgment (and this is in all aspects of life, not just personal relationships).

I personally am not opposed to somone saying "you know what? I think those two would look cute together, and here's why." I say this because it's how my aunt and uncle met and they have been happily married for close to 20 years now. BUT the introduction is where it must end (unless you happen to be a trained professional). If the matchees are constantly being harrassed into the relationship or inquired about it, that is an open invitation for disaster. Which method did your friends use, if you don't mind my asking?

[Asker]

Good point. Denial. They wouldn't stop meddling, but then again, this was when they were teenagers transitioning into adults. But I'm 24 and it's come up. I'm open to being friends with these guys with my friends around, but I'm not going on a date to have it blow up in my face. Back then I would give the guy a chance 'cause I believed it would turn into something serious, but now I'm taking it in stride.

[Anonymous]

Maybe they're hoping that someone will play match maker for them. Or they derive satisfaction from hooking people up in hopes that it will work out.

Girls grow up playing matchmaker between Ken & Barbie and creating a "dream marriage (or relationship)" between the two. So of course when girls grow up they are going to find others (real people) to play matchmaker with and create dream lives for.

[Asker]

Yeah, I guess they want to see other people happy. Ken and Barbie, that's funny but it's like they are the puppertmaster, and me and the guy are the puppets. Something twisted about that. Also, I tend to like to keep boundaries between my friends and my boyfriend because friends are known to meddle, and I'm known to get upset when they do.

[Anonymous]

actually girls may like to match make.. but not a lot of them have the skills. :) You see.. guys and girls look at things differently.. I've noticed.. sometimes a girl that seems cute to another girl is plain or unattractive to a guy.. A girl that is beautiful.. could be cute in guys eyes.. And a girl that is drop dead gorgeous.. well.. both probably agree that much.

[Anonymous]

Live and learn, both you and your friends. I'm sure these girls actually like the guys themselves and just set you up so that they have something to talk about with the guys.

[Asker]

Live and learn...exactly =)

[krisdaschwab912]

If someone were to set me up on a blind date, I would think that it would a friend of mine who knows what I REALLY want in a woman: Confidence, passion, and an ear for metal.

But of course, very few of these women exist in these parts, and those that do are already taken. And my friends know that, therefore they don't even try to set me up on a blind date.

[ryanfromhere]

I will meet people, but if friends tell me they specifically want to set me up or to come on a double date with them and a girl I might like, I just tell them no.

[Asker]

Yeah, no double dates. That's the worst. It's like an all or nothing deal. No blind dates. They are not enjoyable when you don't know or don't even like the person.

[ryanfromhere]

Blind dates are usually death. If you're doing a blind date, meet at a coffee shop and then you can bail within 20 min if it goes bad. Otherwise you can plan something right there.

[Asker]

Lol true. Thanks for the tip.

[taster]

If they know that it won't work then that is stupid..if not malicious...but my female friends used to match me up..and I appreciated that...met my wife through her sister...

[Asker]

Yeah, I don't want to think that way, but when people declare they have a type and the friend goes out and finds the opposite, it's like why bother lol. The guy is all excited, but I'm not. Oh cool, good for you. Glad it worked out! People tend to give me their seconds meaning guys they have liked/hooked up with, and I'm like eww no, I don't take people's leftovers.

[taster]

Yeah..that is just wrong...I mean..fi they didn't like the guy...why in the hell would they think that you would? are you sure these people are your friends?

[Asker]

Lol well those two were friends just not good ones because they aren't in my life anymore =) When I needed them, they weren't easily accessible but when they needed me, I was of course. I don't want to judge my friends who have wanted to recently set me up, but I have told them I don't mind seeing if I could be friends with the guy first; to not force anything on me.

[dIO_oIb]

I'm not into matchmaking.

[toulouse]

not into it,