I need some advice?

[Anonymous]

so me and my husband have been long distance for 3 years due to the pandemic and visa delays also due to having a bad solicitor that messed everything up. It has been a stressful 3 years and I have only seen him 3 times in 3 years... He lives in another country where I met him but we decided 3 years ago that we would settle in my country. So thats why we decided to go long distance so that I could start working and sponsor him. I just found out that he had an affair for the past 6 months. I am devestated beyond belief. He is very sorry and he has ended it with the girl he was having the affair with and he wants to still come to be with me in my country and he says he still loves me. I just dont know what to do. I know he still cheated and we were still married and its a terrible thing he done but being long distance but is very hard and I had only seen him 3 times in 3 years. Whats your advice? By the way I am not excusing his behaviour.

[Anonymous]

Just cause you’re long distance doesn’t mean you can’t stay faithful or that you get a free pass. I know it’s harder said than done, but if cheating is an issue for you then the relationship is over honey. These types of issues only get worse once you live together. I was long distance for 2 years and things get a lot more difficult when you’re together full time.

[Anonymous]

And virtually any other situation I'd say "he cheated on you. What's to think over? He clearly doesn't love you. Because you don't cheat on people you love plain and simple".
But no disrespect, you don't have a marriage. Or a relationship really. How can you even call it that only seeing eachother 3 times in 3 years.
How did you find out he cheated?

[Asker]

A girl contacted me on social media. I dont know what to do :( he still wants to come to my country

[Opinion Owner]

Well if he had told you I would've said there was hope. I have a pretty strict " you cheat on me you're done policy with women".
I'm not going to tell you what to do. Because based on the fact that you've been willing to accept an absent partner forc2 years. Tells me you're nothing like me. But I would have zero problem ending it right now.

[Opinion Owner]

You don't cheat on people you love plain and simple.

[Anonymous]

Is this what you really want for a relationship (is this worth it)? Seriously, give this serious thought. Not only the fact that he's cheated, but just the distance alone. Is 3 times in 3 years enough? Realistically, do you see that changing? Sounds like he TALKS about coming to the same country, but any action to make it happen?