Boyfriend had an accident and wants to stay at my place to recover?

[Anonymous]

We've been dating for around 3 months. It has been a rollercoaster, we mostly argue about his drinking and irresponsible behavior. He is a functioning alcoholic. I live by myself in a big flat, and he lives with flatmates. In the beginning he stayed with me for a week because he was in between flats and it was really hard, I realized I still don't want to live together. But things got better once he moved out and we have been planning in the future to live together. But few days ago he got in a traffic accident while driving drunk, broke his leg and had a surgery. He also got charged for DUI. I am still angry at him, I really don't know how I feel. I went to see him yesterday and we were talking about how hard his recovery is going to be, and I offered him to stay at my place because I felt sorry for him. He doesn't have anyone here and I am his girlfriend, so I felt like it's expected of me to help him. I know I sound like a bad person but I just don't want him here, for many reasons. I believe it will destroy our relationship. If he wasn't driving under influence it would be a different story, but I just can't get over this anger, especially since it wasn't the first time shit happens while he's drunk. My moral self tells me he deserved it and should now pay the consequences. Maybe that's the only way for him to learn. I want to be supportive, but at the same time I don't want to be stupid and sacrifice my own peace of mind for his reckless behavior. How should I approach this?

[Anonymous]

Abort. Hit eject.

This guy ain’t getting better, and a broken leg and convalescence is honestly the least of his problems.

You’re only 3 months into this. 3 months. You’ve already said it’s been an emotional roller coaster with his drinking and irresponsibility and you’ve had arguments. Now he’s had an auto crash, physical injury, and DUI.

You’re only 3 months into this. 3 months.

Save yourself. I know it sucks to kick a person when they are down so to speak, but this person’s chaos and self-destruction will ruin your peace of mind and future.

[jshm2]

Look, kiddo you are not a girlfriend to him, but his ATM, ass to tap, and shelter.

If the fucker cares so little about others that he is willing to DRIVE DRUNK. What makes you think he gives even the tiniest shit about you when sober?

Use this opportunity to cut ties with him. Tell him you cannot cope with an alcohol dependent, let alone one who drives like a fool.

You are supporting his drinking habits and bad choices - not him.

[bubblegunnn]

U shud give him a learn that he will risk his life if he drive under influences.. glad he just broke his bones.. not broke his life. Or u shud give him a warning too if he still do same shit he will lost his chance to be with u, tell him u want him to be a better person.. talk heart to heart whenever he's in a good mood and good moment as well just two of u..

[LazerBean]

Absolutely not. How many people are killed every years by reckless LOSERS because they didn't care enough to just be a decent human being not drive while drunk? And you're actually considering rewarding him by providing him free rent, housekeeping, and card? That guy belongs in a dumpster.

[DannyUk2017]

You should let him learn, and if he still doesn't get it, and makes you the "black sheep", then tell him to fuk off! Simple, no point in wasting ur valuable time with someone that doesn't give 2 💩's about you. Because think about it! You're not in ur teens to just dump him and straight away find someone else, u are looking for someone to settle with! I mean this is my personal opinion, but you can do whatever you feel is best for you.

[Gent207-2]

Girl 2 words:

RUN AWAY

There is no such thing as a functional alcoholic only a barely functioning human. He will drag you to the depths and it will be very difficult to bring yourself back up. Send him elsewhere

[Guy13]

It sounds like he can always have someone keeping an eye 👁 on him with multiple flat mates 🤷🏻‍♂️

[Asker]

Well they are not really close and they are often not at home...

[Guy13]

Alright. Sounds like you want to take care of him anyway…it’s obvious what’s going on. I baited the hook and you bit. 🎣

[exitseven]

This guy sounds like a lost cause. He won;t learn until he ends up in jail or runs over some little kid playing in the street.