So myself and the girl I was seeing broke up about 4 weeks ago. She dumped me. She said she wanted to remain friends the day of the break up however stupidly in my neediness state I said sure and then proceeded to get drunk with her and friends, made a decision to take a drug very uncharacteristic like of me and blacked out and did dumb things. She wasn't very pleasant the week when I went to grab my shit from her house. Almost laughing at me for trying to resolve things. Last weekend she reached out sending me 4 memes which I ignored and then the following evening sent me a message almost to see if I'd respond but wrote in such a way that was very uncharacteristic of her. It wrote " Yo, you get them $$$?" She never writes like that. Anyway the next day I said fuck it and sent her back some memes and responded to the message simply saying "yeah the money is in my account". She reacted to my memes and said nothing of substance. Later that evening I made the decision considering everything and how she treated me to say.. "look yesterday I don't know what that exchange was. I don't know what your intentions are but I have no interest in being friends. You wanted a break up and I want to respect that. I want to focus on myself and my life and move on. If you want to meet up in person and talk let me know and we can arrange a date , but I have no interest in being friends. I wish you the best" She responded with a generic FB Thumbs Up I love her and do want her back, but was this too strong? Should I have just went no contact and not said anything? I fear I may have lost her completely. A few days later she posted a picture of herself that I took of her on our first date looking gorgeous. I'm questioning what her motive is if any females here have a Idea, seemed like she's trying to get back at me or is upset I rejected her. Anyway I would appreciate any advice from here. I do still love her but I'm still hurt and I do want her in my future Thanks everyone ❤️
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What Girls Said
hi, person
thank you for sharing your story.
you were together and that’s not nothing. in instances of a breakup, there’s a period of grief and remorse and intense missing the other person. yes, even the person who broke up with the other goes through it. if they’re human
she said she wants to be friends and then proceeded to check up on you with goofy message because she simply cares for you. there was something between you. she wouldn’t robotically turn that off and move on
it doesn’t mean she wants you back. she just doesn’t want you to hate her. it’s your decision
although i understand where she’s coming from trying to soften the blow and move on like friends, you don’t have to agree to go with it. and once she sees you’re okay and business as usual, her guilt feelings will be over and she’ll drop the friends thing and stop sending memes that don’t mean anything
bottom line, she’s trying to soften the blow. some women hate it if someone is mad at them.
but it’s fine, you recover the way you need to. she’s made her decision
exes weren’t meant to be friends anyway
You acted impulsively and under anger and that is the best recipe for disaster.
I cannot believe that you are 32 because the way you reacted is more the way a teenager would and not a person that is supposed to be an adult and have some maturity.
Your best option is to forget about trying to get back together. You had your time with her but now the time has come to move on and forget about the past. Both of you acted impulsively and after what has been said (and done), it would be a mistake to try to hold on to someone that has severed the relationship.
By stating that you did not want to be friends with her, you clearly indicated that the breakup was definite and that she belonged in your past forever.
Just think! What would happen if you got together again? With the next argument, you (or her) would make this situation even worse by saying something like "it was a mistake to get together with you again".
It is always best to learn from your mistakes and not to make them twice. Good luck.