This one is for the guys please If you have been through it I really desperately need advice?

[Anonymous]

My ex and I broke up 3 months ago due to long distance and after two months of no contact we talked about what's been happening during the break just casual conversation. And a topic about us came up. He said us cutting contact made him feel bad and that he doesn't want to lose me from his life. But that he's not ready for a relationship. And that if he were to be in one it would be me. I understand because things in his life are not set, there's so much he has to do, as do I. But the thing is I can't be just his friend, its all or nothing for me. and I need to cut contact off completely or I will never move on. He's a great guy. There was no ill will or problems. and he understood me as I understood his situation. It just hurts. Have you been through this kind of situation?

[Saiesh30]

Yeah it's common actually. More common in long distance relationships but not just confined to it. As in couples who even live in the same city are not able to give each other enough time and choose to move on.
You can't actually keep your foot in two different boats right? Either you're in it or you're not.
If you're in it, then you're gonna commit to it fully and have patience through thick and thin which ain't easy ofcourse. That's why the word chosen here is commitment.
If you're not into it, then it doesn't matter if the guy is good or not. You get a grip and move on.

[lightbulb27]

makes sense. timing is off and have to let go. conflicting needs. either break off totally or he caves in and commits and you work it out together.

[KrakenAttackin]

Long distance relationships are doomed to fail. Move on.