I’ve had an on and off fling with a guy for about 2 years. He started out strong but he would not be consistent all the time and I would get annoyed and give him a hard time about it. We eventually went our separate ways.
I met someone else and Throughout that time he kept contacting me and a mutual friend to get me to come back to him. I denied. that relationship didn’t work out either so I ended up going back to him. I told him what happened and he seemed to be upset that I moved on so quickly. We had sex a few times but went our separate ways over the same thing.
he later saw me on Instagram and reached out and told me he missed me. he later introduced me to his parents, his friends, and anytime I was around he would let people know he was with me. we spent a lot of time together, he admitted his feelings. He soon after had to go out of town for work (he’s an artist), he didn't know when he was coming back. he shared his location with me. But the first day he arrived, He removed me as a follower on Instagram. I confronted him about it and he said it was not intentional and he was not able to follow me back due to issues with Instagram. I believed it to be a lie as it sounded bizarre. I got upset And lashed out through text.
He tried to prove to me he wasn’t lying and I just didn’t want to hear it. It wouldn’t be the first time he lied. He asked why I cared so much about IG and I told him what had been on my chest, that I’ve been trying to love him but he won’t allow me to and I always felt he doesn’t want me. he said “you don’t know what love is” and told me to go back to the man I was with after him. Hours later he posted on IG that everyone always validates his music except the one person he wants to be validated by and post a link in his bio to a song he wrote the year I left him. About a woman leaving and saying he wants her but doesn’t want to commit. Is this about someone else, because if he wanted me he wouldn’t have unfollowed me and blocked my text.
1 mo
Is he trying to get my attention or some else through song?
What Girls & Guys Said
Opinion
2Opinion
You will never be able to escape the toxicity of this situation if you don’t leave him alone for good. That means to stop feeding into his mind games, checking his social media and making him such a relevant staple in your life.
Within 2 years you have gotten the full extent of what this man has to offer, which at the end of the day amounts to nothing. It’s nice to romanticize some of his actions and think he comes back because he misses you and wants to change, but you know that’s not the reality of the situation, he comes back for the familiarity of you and the convenience of the sex he will inevitably get if he just gives you the right amount of care and attention. Then he leaves again.
This is a situation you have been shown time and time again there will be no change. He’s just not offering you a committed, consistent, loving relationship, so as hurtful as it is, you should really stop ignoring the red flags and signs and just be done already.
Oh man sis, boys can be so confusing sometimes! It definitely sounds like this guy has some issues with consistency and communication. I wouldn't trust that excuse about Instagram issues either - blocking you and then posting such a pointed song just seems shady.
Part of me wonders if he's still not totally over you moving on after him in the past. Reacting that way to hearing about your other relationship does make it seem like he's got unresolved feelings or jealousy still. But then he goes and unfollows you? Makes no sense!
It's possible the song is about you deep down, even if he tries to play it off different. Guys can be weird about expressing their real emotions sometimes. But honestly at this point after all the back and forth, I wouldn't put too much stock in trying to decipher it.
You said it yourself - if he really wanted you, he wouldn't keep blocking you out. You deserve someone stable who gives you clarity and commitment. Don't get sucked back into this cycle with him sis! I say show him you've moved on for real too. Focus on you and keep it pushing - his mixed signals ain't worth the stress!
I doubt it
You doubt what?