I told my ex girlfriend to stop contacting me?

[Timewilltell18]

so my ex broke up with me feb 5th saying she couldn't balance college and a relationship she was crying when she broke up with me and started crying again when she walked into the house. ( I don't know if I believe what she said) well anyway she kept wanting to be best friends, I told her I couldn't be friends because it hurts to much.

anyway 4 days goes by and she sent me a text saying hi, I ignored it and the next day she removed me from bbm,I asked her why and she said it was to hard to see my status and picture change, well I tried to be friends but I couldn't do it so I told we couldn't talk and she agreed.

so 5 days after she texted me saying " still can't be friends?" I just replied saying "hey what are you up to?" she said just drinking with the boys ( I don't know why she would tell me that) anyway I ended up asking her to come over she said she was tired and was about to go home and go to bed and she also said , I don't think its a good idea because I might try and do something wrong like hooking up"

so anyway I went to bed after that and when I woke up at 7 am I sent her a text saying when you wake up tell me I need to call you and talk to you, so rite when she wakes up at 11 am she calls me and asks what I needed to tell her

I asked her if she wanted to hangout today, but she was having a girlfriend come over who she never seen in a couple of months , I was like alright that's fine then I asked her why she texted me last night and she said she was drunk and maybe wanted to invite me out, but after that I told her nicely can you stop texting me, and she said sorry I won't do it again so I said goodbye and when she said bye it sounded like she was crying.

like I want her back so bad, but I just can't be friends right now, she doesn't want a relationship and she said the chances of us getting back with each other are slim, so why is she texting me still?

I'm hopeing I can still win her back my plan is on March the 8th I'm going to start talking to her again and hangout and try and win her back.

[hunibee]

Break ups are very difficult...especially if you have been dating a long time and your lives become interwoven. What can happen after a break up especially if they don't end with someone hating the other one is that things can remind you of your ex and you may miss the connection that you shared. Not to sound cruel but I think your ex is being selfish. I don't buy the "I can't juggle school and a relationship" excuse...then she is out partying with other guys? I think she was craving attention and feeling unloved and possibly missed you a little so she texted. It happens very frequently. I agree with you to wait it out, but I would not go into it saying you will be friends with the hopes of "winning" her back. You should go into it knowing your value and it is her loss if she doesn't figure that out by now. Don't settle for friends. If she wants you in her life right now, then make it be on your terms! Down the line, when you no longer have feelings for her, you can be friends then. Any other terms, well then you are her stand by and I am afraid a lot of heartache will be there for you.

If she does still care for you, she will come around on her own. Don't give her the opportunity to devalue what you want or to take charge of it all. You don't have to be disrespectful or mean about it but stick to your guns. You can let her know you would like her back but in a relationship. You will earn her respect this way and she will need to make her own decision.

This is just my thought. I could be completely wrong not knowing your full relationship...but I have known many girls to use guys for times when they are feeling low about themselves just to lift them up. I find that a good rule to stick to is one question..."What value is added to my life by this relationship?" Make sure you are getting just as much as you give or more... This will help you make your decision. Goodluck!

[AnonymousGal]

I actually think, that she might be looking for a sign that you want her back, because she regrets her decision of breaking-up with you. I am assuming this, because of the amount she is crying, trying to contact you and because telling you she was drinking with guys seems like an obvious move to make you jealous and gauge your reaction.

I might be wrong though and, she Flowergirl98 might be right. Break-up are always difficult, especially when a couple has been together for a while. She might just still feel attached to you and doesn't want to lose you completely, because you're important to her.

The only way to find out, is to put yourself out there and ask her.

However if I am right, and I think there's quite a big likelihood I am, and you wait until March, it might break her heart thinking you don't care about her anymore at all, and it might then be to late for you to win her back. In this situation, maybe this is your best move: tell her that you still have feelings for her, and that you think she might still have feelings for you. That you want to take a second go at the relationship, but that you both need a short break from each other, in order to put things in perspective. Tell her that breaking-up with you really hurt you, and that if in fact she does want to get back together, she must understand, that she needs to gain your trust back slowly. Now this is putting yourself out there and rejection might be scary, but at least you will know where you stand.

[aly-marie]

My advice would be to let it go, try to move on. She is giving you mixed signals and doesn't know what she wants. That will only end up hurting you.

In my perspective, breaking up because you can't "balance" the relationship is kinda lame. A relationship shouldn't be causing enough stress and problems to interfere with school. It is hard, but not THAT hard. It seems she's just unable to fully commit.

I would strongly advise that you cut off all contact with her. But if you really want to try getting her back, that's up to you. Just don't settle for being the friend; that would probably hurt you the most.

[Flowergirl98]

she enjoys your company but does not want you and does not want to hurt your feeligs aswel cause she realizes you are a good guy but can't somehow fall for you. I have done it before I thought I loved the guy but after a few months I realized I was more into my ex. though I still wanted to talk to him and be freinds I knew I was hurting him, so I let him make the decision and did not care what he did but felt sorry that I was hurting him. I would pick up whenever he called but sometimes would ignore so he could at least back off and find other girls. its been 2 years now and we still talk now and again he has a girl freind but still has feelings for me but I won't cause I'm still with my boy friend and kove him to bits

[Flowergirl98]

need my questions answered aswel from a guys point of view