Polls: Break Up & Divorce

I spent some time with a longtime galpal of mine last weekend. She's a wonderful woman and probably the only true "gal pal" I have.

Anyway she just got in a divorce a month ago after a 6 year relationship. She told me that she was struggling to "forgive herself" for making the decision to leave her ex. However whenn we met up last weekend she was at probably her most attractive, most confident and most successful I have ever seen her. I found it incredible (and scary) that she was able radiate like this after only being broken up for A MONTH. She also told me she already found a fuck buddy only ONE WEEK after she broke up with her ex. Her ex knows this guy too.

She told me that her ex "was a good man" but definitely not an "alpha". She told me how his quirks eventually drove her nuts. She was is probably more of a "guy's girl" chics I know, but she hinted about some eccentric/hypocritical behavior's I really dislike in women. She tells me that I should be more comfortable and "open" with my sensitivities/emotions i. e. they are not a turnoff to women. However she also alluded to saying this one of the major reasons she dumped her ex (I've been following Corey Wayne about this). It depressed me to hear this feminine double standard.

Anyway her ex was completely taken off guard by this break up (of course). I'm almost completely sure he went on cruise control after they got married and just brushed off her emotional/bitchy moments as no big deal. However I think this was a long time coming (in her mind) and finally she snapped.

Case in point I believe most women usually break up with men LONG before they leave them. They come to a mental decision, make plans (including back up guys) and then look for ways to "justify" the split (pay more attention to a guy's quirks, mistakes, etc). This is a strategy to placate their conscious. Not saying it's completely wrong, but it's really just sad. Most guys usually don't see this coming.

Everyone has pride, everyone has a protective wall up to Guard against their feelings and emotions. Some of us believe that when you admit your deepest feelings and emotions to your partner, you stand a great chance of breaking up & losing them forever or even having them take advantage of you in the relationship. Basically having them miss treat you in the relationship.
Almost like the rumor about getting someone's name tattooed on you, iI've always been told to never get a girls name tattooed on me because it's almost like admitting ownership and it's always like jinxing the relationship. I was told that by tattooing their name on your body is basically putting yourself in harms way to lose them forever. I don't know how true that is but I believe it personally.
What I'm trying to say is... I've often herd that by telling your significant other things like this...

(I... I think I'm in love with you. Everything you do and say to me excites me and you mean the world to me! I don't know where my life would be without you and I would probably die if you walked out of my life)

Blah blah blah all that deep emotional stuff😳🙄
you guys get the picture though. I was told by admitting things like that your basically giving someone power over you to command or mistreat you.

do you ladies and gentlemen agree with me? Or do you think it's not really a big deal to admit your deepest feelings to your significant other?

I'm using my cousin's account and saw my boyfriend have sex with his ex. I ran into his childhood bully in a bar and we have had sex after I broke up with him. Should I boast that I slept with him and was I right?

I've heard of people taking breaks (I'm not totally sure if I know what that means). The way I understand the definition is the couple isn't monogamous for a short period, but anticipates they'll likely be committed again.

Would you get back into a relationship with a person that had sex with someone a day or week after the break started?
I'm just joking by the memes. I'm curious what your opinion is.

I’d love to hear what any husbands who stop by have to say in answer to this question. I personally believe that a marriage contract has been breached the moment either the wife gets pregnant by another man or the husband gets another woman pregnant. There is no longer a marriage at that point as far as I’m concerned. Sometimes I find myself holding very antiquated and sexist views. I’m not bragging about that as it’s nothing to brag about. I’m just being honest in admitting that I am not always consistent in my opinions and that my opinions about cheating sometimes change depending on the gender of the cheater. For example I can more easily find reasons for a wife to stay with her husband if he’s cheated and gotten another woman pregnant than I can find for a man to stay with his wife. It seems somehow worse to me when a wife steps out on her husband and gets pregnant by another man, and I see it as somehow indicative of a weakness in character when a man stays with his wife under those circumstances. To get pregnant by another man to me is just the ultimate insult to your husband. So I pose the question to any husband who is reading, if your wife got pregnant by another man would you stay and if you would stay what would be your reasoning in deciding to stay?

Well about a month ago my ex broke up with me. She didn't give a clear reason, mostly "it's me not you", "I don't know", "it's not ankther guy or anything." Of course I was devistated because it was out of the blue. And I really loved this girl. Anyways, now everytime I see her I kinda get this weird feeling of anger and sadness at the same time and I end up having to like do shit tons of physical excercise to kinda blow of steam. But I'm starting to get this urge to just say "fuck you" or something. Straight up. I mean when she walked away she seemed so, okay and kept saying not to make her feel bad, we should be friends, you're a nice guy, I don't want you to be hurt, etc. etc. etc. but I really just kinda want to say "fuck you" for some reason. It's... A weird urge... I can't really explain very well...

Interesting story that happened in 2013. I'd like to hear your thoughts

From the article:

" Before Petrakis married Peter Petrakis in 1998, she was presented with what her lawyer called a "heavy handed" prenup that would give her $25,000 for every year that she and her husband were married, but nothing more. She originally refused to sign it, but a few days before her wedding, she agreed to sign after her husband promised her he would do away with the prenup once the two began to have children. He did not destroy the prenup, even after they had children, according to his estranged wife.

The couple separated, and a court ruled on Feb. 20 that Peter Petrakis had "fraudulently induced" Elizabeth Petrakis to sign the prenup that hung only on a verbal promise.

But Elizabeth Petrakis' cousin Alisa Houraney claims that there was more to the marriage's end than a problematic prenup

Houraney and her now ex-husband Steve Houraney were married at a 250-person wedding in Garden City, N. Y., in 2007. But Houraney said that within weeks of the wedding, she suspected the affair.

Houraney said that she and her cousin Elizabeth were so close that Elizabeth was in the waiting room a few weeks later when Houraney gave birth.

["She was sleeping with him, and she was in the waiting room when I delivered my son," Houraney said. "[My husband] left me there, and went with [Petrakis] in the waiting room."]

Houraney and her husband were married for less than a year before splitting.

["I just feel that, somebody like that, people need to know the truth," Houraney said. "She says her husband is a good guy and he's a good person. He treated her like a princess, never was mean to her, never cheated on her. I don't understand why she's saying, 'poor victim' when you had a good life and you have to destroy two families."] "

Source

I and my EX have a mutual friend John. John is my best friend and its his birthday next week. He promised to my EX and her friends that he was going to invite them to a party but then I broke up with my girlfriend.

John told me that he didn't invite my EX and her friends because he didn't want to make me upset. He also told me that its totally up to me and if I want I can invite them to his birthday party and if not its totally cool. To be honest I would rather not party with my EX-girlfriend BUT its my best friend's birthday and I have a lot of respect for him. I want his birthday party to be the best one ever and if he can get lucky with one of my EX's friends good for him.

I broke up with my EX and told her I don't want to see or talk to her ever again.

What would you do if you were in my shoes? Would you invite your EX or tell your friend that its best if she doesn't come BUT its totally his choice and I'll respect it?

We broke up for seemingly other reasons, but now I feel like she made them up because she was feeling guilty. I found out through a friend that she had been cheating on me. We haven't talked since the breakup and I'm wondering if I should write her a letter telling her that I know? I don't want her to think that I care... just that I know and I'm disappointed.

We finally ended things after an off and on relationship. She said she doesn't believe me when I tell her she loves me. She didn't believe that I loved her at all because I didn't show it. Truth be told I was under so much fricken stress that I neglected her got pissed off easily and saod mean things. It just burned a hole in my heart when she said that because I would do anything in the world for her.

I didn't tear up or anything but you could see it in my face and hear it in my voice. I've always been a tough guy this was the first time she's ever seen me emotional. I feel completely emasculated.

My ex broke up with me two nights ago. I couldn't see it then, but I now realize it was because of my clingyness and jealousy, all stemming from my issues of insecurity. I feel like I pushed her too far with these issues and caused her to become less attracted to me and ultimately caused her to break things off. I'm devastated, but working on improving myself to figure out how to make sure this doesn't happen again.
I really want your insight on how I can rekindle the relationship. We dated for nine months, the last six months were long distance, but these nine months were a very intense and extremely bonding time. After only two months I had met and stayed with her parents in her childhood home, and after only one month we both said I love you. She was very sad to break up with me (cried the whole time) and said that I am very special to her and she loves me. She said she still wants to be friends, but doesn't know how to not be in a relationship with me. She said she would want to contact me every once in a while, but I said I'll need time, so we decided that I would be the one who contacts her when I'm ready.
I know because our bond was so strong that she still has feelings for me, at least for now. Do I wait to tell her what I've learned, or contact her sometime in the future? My emotions are still very raw so I will definitely wait some time, but maybe this relationship is just over? please help

So tell me whats the point of keeping your ex lover on fb, whats app etc.., if you make it clear to them to move on, that it's over, and how much you hate them and dispise them.

yet you keep them on social media, eventually answer a phone call they make etc...

Maybe im wrong but if you hate someone , and you tell them you don't like them anymore, why won't you just bann them and delete them from all social media. I think it's hypocrit to say one thing but dont follow up with any logic actions.

I fell in love with the girl and we got together about a year and a half or so ago. However we have broken up about 3 months ago. the reason why we broke up was cause i would force myself onto her. I would do so because she denied me sex. I would get pissy and bitchy (bitching about her past (which i will talk about later) trying to guilt trip her into sex) or i would touch her in attempt to turn her on. This was however at the expense of her heath as we always liked it rough and after awhile her vajayjay was injured... in the way that she had meds to take to help ease the pain. if im not wrong she had an ovarian cyst or something. But even after her getting hurt id continue to fore myself onto her every now and then until one day she left.

Back story: I am actually really traditional when it comes to relationships and didn't even kiss a girl until i was with her (at the age of 18). however she lost her virgin to her previous bf who due to the word limit i shant continue. But anws, this affected me as i felt she was tainted. i was really insecure about her past and the time i felt secure felt like nothing else mattered was when we had sex. which was why i got addicted to it after awhile... we started sex a month into our relationship. thus the foundation of our relationship was built mainly around sex.. so when she asked me to stop it was really hard. at times i would act with out thinking. I really regret what i have done cause i really do love every atom that makes her being...

Question: I have not talked to her for about 2 months now and recently started but i can tell that she's pushing me away as she gives me few word replies or she'll say "ttyl" and not talk to me anymore. I spent these 2 months reflecting and finding myself once more and now that i feel that there is progress and i am able to finally accept her past i want to get back with her, start a fresh and show that i love her and not lust for her. but i dont know what to do. any suggestions?

PLEASE HELP ME OUT GUYS!!

It's been a month since my break up of 10 months. I am in no contact since one month (contacted one time though for apologizing ie 5 days after Breakup). During NC i reminded each and every cause why she broke up with me at first place and I am regretting that, I am a changed person now and I want her back in my life.

Now since one week she's giving me mixed signals by changing her Whatsapp status and she's also login-ed my Facebook account 3 times in the same week (I haven't changed my password yet).

I am totally Confused what to do should I approach her!

Or should I change my password and show her that I have moved on.

Or should I send her signals too?

On the other hand m scared, what if she says no after if I approach her.
I don't wanna be in her friend zone too.

I love her very much and I know she's also emotionally attached.!

Guys please help me, need your opinion!!.

my gf n i dated for 2 months n cared about each other a lot n both felt very strongly for the other n had a great relationship aside from a few disagreements. last week my gf broke up with me because she wasn't getting enough freedom in our relationship and missed her friends and wanted to be able to do whatever she wanted without having to worry about what i thought or feel guilty. she is 18 i am 20 so we are in diferent places and i understood where she was coming from. i sent her an email explaining that i knew wher ei went wrong and assured her that if we tried again that she would get her requests and that i would ease up and not be up her ass so much. she responded well, saying how she still loved me and wanted to be apart of my life and could see herself with me sometime in the future but needed some time to think. she wanted to be with me but wasn't sure she could handle it she said. we hung out two days later and made out a lot and had a great time, like nothing had changed. she said she still needed time though so i decided not to contact her first so that she could do what she needed to do. she texted me two days later asking to do new years, i said yea but had some questions. i wanted to know if we were on the road to getting back together at least, she said she still wasn't sure and urged me to just let it happen. i agreed but then made the mistake of pushing for more answers until she finally said she just wanted to be friends until we both healed. this hurt me very badly and i reacted immaturely because of it. i sent her a very mean text that hit below the belt. she sent me a few texts and then i blocked her on all social media. her friend texted me the next day saying i was an asshole and that she blocked my number but admitted that it was to mask the pain becuase obviously i wasn't pestering her. she texted me last. its been two days since then, i upset her very badly with what i said. will i ever hear from her again or did i take it beyond repair