Attractive Girls Vs. Average Girls

Attractive Girls Vs. Average Girls

Enter the mind of the most common American male. Now you're in his head as he's being put in a room. And now there's a party going on in this room. And now there's two girls are only with one or two other people...looking a little bored or lost. One girl is pretty attractive...what he would consider an 8 or 9. The other is what he would consider maybe a 5 or 6 if he were being generous. Now, it should be noted, the common American male isn't that confident and also hates being rejected. So who does he walk up to and who will more likely be receptive to him if he does?

Many guys will go after the unattractive girl...why? Because they fear they won't be accepted by the hot girl. It doesn't make sense...a hot girl liking him right off the bat. The fear of going for it and it not working out is so paralyzing because he wants it so bad, whereas the average girl...it's whatever.

Here's another thing--he mistakenly believes the average girl will feel lucky to be hit on by him. He thinks in some twisted way that she will be like "omg a hot guy talked to me!" He thinks it's a layup and he thinks the attractive girl is a half court shot...oh the irony.

Average homegirl thinks you're patronizing her, or maybe making fun of her, or maybe just talking to her for a quick lay because you couldn't possibly be taking a girl like her seriously.

You're in the room now and, if you're lucky, she's only blowing off the common American male who's chosen to talk to her over the very pretty girl (by most classic standards) if you're not lucky she's literally verbalizing that she knows "what you're doing" and not having any of it and then you sort of shirk away to get another drink hoping no one saw that crash and burn and wondering what the hell is her problem. Why does this happen so often with the average ones? They believe they're average even more than you do and so it's classic rejecting you before she gets rejected syndrom. We as humans have strong held beliefs that we hold as facts. It's scary to think you could be serious and it's easier to dismiss it even if she came to the party for the single purpose of meeting an attractive guy.

So common American Male--don't put average girls on a pedestal as nicer than pretty girls. Yes, pretty girls tend to be more flighty because of their huge amount of options but they also tend to be nicer (in my experience.)

***This take is based highly on empirical evidence and in no way stands as a conclusive fact or definition about what to expect from average vs. pretty girls. This is what i believe most men will encounter in general, but of course there are insecure pretty girls and very confident average girls but they are not the majority. Also pretty vs average is obviously a subjective term...i don't like using the word ugly so i use the word average...


5|4
2224
pavlove is a GirlsAskGuys Editor
Who are Editors?

Most Helpful Girl

  • First of all, great take. As a male, you had the chance to "enter" a girl's mind and see what was going on in there.
    I can agree that average girls tend to be more difficult (in the sense of personality) than pretty girls for the same reasons you stated. But it's not true for everyone and some of these average girls are not even looking for a lay (reason why, maybe, they do look "average" at that particular time). I do believe everyone can look somehow "hot" at a party. It's easier to dissimulate.
    Anyway, as a pretty average girl myself (I'll let others decide lol), when I go at parties, I don't expect to be talk to by anyone. I don't necessarily send off "fuck off" vibes, but I don't try to smile at any guy who's not in my group of friends because one night stands are really not my thing--though I did kiss and flirt with numerous guys before.

    2|1
    0|0
    • And this "Many guys will go after the unattractive girl... why? Because they fear they won't be accepted by the hot girl. It doesn't make sense... a hot girl liking him right off the bat." is you thinking exactly like the average girl. Why would a hot guy like her right off' the bat?

    • exactly and it's doubly ironic because not only are pretty girls generally nicer and more receptive to flirting than your average guys thinks... average girls are many times a lot less receptive in comparison because of the insecurities i mentioned among other things.

      you're right I'd say the same applies to guys. Sure, you have your occasional really attractive guy who's also super outgoing but often times a really attractive guy likes being flirted with and is sincere when he flirts because he thinks people should want to flirt with him/tends to be more passive than average guys etc.

Most Helpful Guy

  • You seem to take a lot of flack for the use of the word average... just a suggestion but maybe your next take just use less attractive or reasonably good looking.

    In my opinion girls who reasonably good looking are often easier to approach because of their demeanor. They tend to be more friendly and outgoing. Girls who are pretty often give off a vibe that they are untouchable. Perhaps they are overcompensating because they actually get approached less (based on your theory to), not sure?

    Overall, I think you have some valid points, but I think what it ultimately comes down to is attitude. If you are the guy and you have a - I could care less about my ego attitude - and just try, then you could very well end up with a great looking girl. If you err on the side of caution all the time... then you end up with whom you were intended based on the level of effort you made.

    Regardless of pretty, not as pretty and not so pretty at all... picking the girl up is just the beginning, it is who she is after you have spent some time with her that makes her the woman you either stay with or continue looking.

    1|1
    0|0

Join the discussion

What Girls Said 21

  • my friends jump on anyone that talks to them whereas i am a bit picky so I dunno about this... but then I am not American and British guys seem to go along with being rather 'cheeky'

    2|2
    0|0
    • yeah i'd say they do. americans gets easily offended if you don't act like they're the sh**.

      haha so you're saying you're one of the pretty ones?

    • i will let you decide... I dont think i am but I get a lot of attention so maybe not lol

  • Well... I think most girls know all this, but guys might not.
    Which is sad, because then they think women are 'so blessed' in the dating department. Ironic.

    3|2
    0|0
    • yeah, exactly. it's knowing these things that i think are important to understanding women at least some what...

  • Lol makes sense why so many guys ask me out.

    I agree and the part of what us average/not pretty girls think is SPOT ON (for ME at least).
    I think either:
    -he's got some silly bet/contest with his guys to pick up the most plain chick.
    -he's looking for a "slumpbuster" or an easy lay and figures me being meh, my panties would just fly off. Especially if he's hot, they think I'm "honored" to be asked by them. Pfffftttt.
    -he's too intimidated to talk to one of my friends and is using me to get on her good side.
    This has happened to me unfortunately and I mistakenly started liking him, little did I know, I was his stepping stool to get to my bff. I don't blame him because she's beautiful and nice.
    -he'd never take me seriously.

    You are correct on that lol As I said, my friends are pretty and very nice. The prettier they are, the nicer they are.
    I'm pretty much a bitch and averageish. A basic bitch I think is the term? Lol

    2|3
    0|0
    • Wow that really sad XD, buti gotta say not all guys are trying 2 get that out of you and the more you think that way i worst choices you will make goodluck

    • Show All
    • maybe they like the bitch side of you? everyones different and every girl is a bitch in some way most just wait till they are married 2 show it to you. At least your straight and honest/funny thats just my opinioin who knows i might be wrong ^^

    • But if you truly believe that someone can't like you for who you are then every relationship is set up 2 fail

  • eghh I do the same with guys :/
    if a hot guy approaches me I might reject him
    and if he s an average it would be easier to interact with him.

    1|3
    0|0
    • right cuz you're keeping your reality in tact--your reality is that you don't get with really hot guys so its easier to interact with an average so much so that you'd even reject someone who'd challenge that reality like a hot guy that was into you. (hot being relative to how you personally see it)

    • Show All
    • @Moose2coolvargas hmm?

  • according to the many, this school of thought is common among men in japan too. the majority of men don't want to target the prettiest girl in a group because they assume it will be harder to achieve anything with her due to her ego (meaning she might be high maintenance) and heightened competition. most men want the runner (s) up, the average looking girls who are wearing very conservative, yet feminine clothes. most men do not want women who stand out, women know this and dress and act conservatively. it's a big game.

    0|1
    0|0
  • I was distracted by the fact there is an anime style picture in this take. I was thinking,"Holy shit he actually used an anime pictures!. O. O" :D

    0|1
    0|0
    • Have you played Catherine?

    • Show All
    • uh, there have been countless studies in us about negative affect of video games and violence in videogames so yes it is an American thing as well as some other countries.

      PEOPLE OF GAG STOP DEBATING ME WHEN YOU DON'T CLEARLY DON'T READ OR HAVE ANY FACTS TO BACK UP YOUR STATEMENTS

    • What the hell are you talking about?

      What does that have to do with a kid ending up not wanting to leave their room. Due to playing video games?

  • How receptive they are has nothing to do with their looks. It's 50/50.
    Some pretty girls are really really picky some aren't
    Some average girls are really really picky some aren't

    4|1
    0|0
    • yeah you're right it's entirely 50/50. Everything is exactly even and exactly fair. You really have a realistic view point on life. Thank you for this.

    • Show All
    • very few are exactly 50/50 or even close

    • I guess that would depend on the attractiveness of the person. For an average person things are closer to 50/50. For an unattractive person things don't work often in their favor in terms of sex and dating. For an attractive person things TEND to work in their favor.

  • As a very average and plain girl myself, I can see where you're coming from in this take. But I still think you're making some broad generalizations.

    And average doesn't mean ugly so don't use it as a synonym, because it's not.

    3|0
    0|0
    • and I sense you always will lol

    • Show All
    • it's not about my feeling get hurt it's about the message being heard. I want it to reach the most amount of people possible. If that means using nicer language so that people are more receptive i'm all for it.

    • Fair enough.

  • Nice myTake. It's nice to hear a differing opinion from a male on this.

    0|1
    0|0
  • Yeah, it's true, but why are some guys afraid when an attractive girls are pursuing them?

    2|1
    0|0
  • I don't get why a man would flirt a woman he doesn't feel attracted to, in the first place. Is it so important to have a girlfriend that you'd take anyone over not having a relationship?

    0|0
    0|0
    • lol it's not a girlfriend they're after usually more like a decent f***

    • still, it's weird. anyone would do? it's kinda slutty

    • within reason but often a lot of girls fit the sex bill than fit the girlfriend bill

  • Empiricle... you mean anecdotal?

    1|2
    0|0
  • i dont think its automatic that they think the hot girl won't like em. it may also be that they prefer and are drawn to someone at their level cuz its balanced. there is symmetry in nature. our society already puts hot people so much on the pedestal, i feel like its gonna lead people to grow old and depressed cuz the glow is gone.

    0|0
    0|0
  • I would totally talk to a hot guy.. we can't know someone without spending time with them. 😄😄

    0|0
    0|0
  • Yup. My boyfriend was pretty cautious when I began pursuing him.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Hmm good to know how the common male brain works : P

    0|0
    0|0
  • Actually, I'm going to say thank you, despite all these irritated reactions out here. And I'll be anonymous because what I have to say will be highly disliked and I don't feel like dealing with that.

    I have been feeling really insecure about my boyfriend. We met in college, at first very briefly but we still did meet. And we only 'got together' after about 2 months, when he actually paid more attention to me and actively started pursuing me. Until then he casually fucked what are, in my opinion, girls from freaking ugly to average looking. And I always felt that somehow I was his last choice. In my opinion, I am very attractive. (I can't say this without people interpreting it as arrogance, when in fact it's honesty.) So the idea offended me deeply.
    Afterwards, I would catch him looking at girls' pictures on FB, again, from average to ugly, and I would feel offended. He did try to explain that it's a self esteem issue and that he never thought of me as a last resort, but rather as someone out of his league. I thought this was bogus and that he invented that to get me off his case. But I believe you may just have contributed a little to the bettering of my relationship. And to the death of my insecurities.

    0|1
    0|0
    • this makes me really happy to hear. i'm glad you read this exactly how i meant it and it made a difference however small to your life!

    • yes :) it did. it helped me consider that he might have actually been honest, not just try to make me feel better, and that helps a lot.

  • Lol you've got it wrong. The nice hot girls usually are the insecure ones, not the confident ones. The confident ones behave like this "Did I give you permission to speak to me? Go away!" and are only nice to guys they deem attractive. Your advice only works for attractive guys, not the common male.

    1|0
    0|0
  • It's not okay to judge people based on something that they cannot change. As other people say pickiness has nothing to do with their appearance and the same goes for their personalities. I know many people do that but it sounds pretty rude to me that you chose a girl who you think unattractive so you have more chance lol

    4|0
    0|0
  • I think "average" girls are attractive. They may not be "hot" but can still be attractive.

    1|1
    0|0
    • fair point. i hope you know what i meant by attractive versus average in the context of this post though

    • Yes, but I think "hot" vs "average" is better. For example, I am considered attractive/hot, however I consider my self 'average' and that to me is ok.

    • so you feel you're attractive but not hot

  • More from Girls
    1

What Guys Said 23

  • I think average girls tend to be more promiscuous than the really beautiful girls. Even if you meet a beautiful girl who is promiscuous at least she's got something rare (beauty) to offset the negative of her being promiscuous. So I think its dumb to go for the less attractive girl just because you think you've got a better shot of getting an easy lay.

    2|2
    0|0
    • what difference does it make to you, if she's had a lot of sex before you. its got nothing to do with you or your relationship. of you care about things that don't exist anymore, the you don't actually have a relationship with a person. you're just dating a specter. whats the point?

    • Show All
    • @Bandit74 She's asking you a polite, logical question. Why can't you just answer it calmly, politely, and logically?

    • @pavlove
      1) I am calm, its not like I wrote it in all caps.

      2) Why doesn't she calmly and logically respond to me question "Why does she care what my dating preferences are"?

      3) As for why I answered the way I did, its because I've seen how these discussions tend to lay out. Whenever a guy expresses the opinion that he doesn't want to be with a promiscuous partner, girls like Azara will talk down to them and attempt to shame them for their dating preferences. The conversations always go down that road and then usually one person will either block or just stop responding to the other. The arguments never lead anywhere and either side ever changers their opinion or gains anything from the conversation.

      So because of that I prefer to avoid them.

  • Average girls are manipulative. I don't need to guess that the pretty ones are mean. They usually make it pretty obvious how mean they are. They think in their teens and 20s that they can get away with having shitty attitudes toward everyone, because they're just that good-looking.

    Then, they enter their 30s and that all changes. Suddenly, they look like the garbage they've been behaving like, and cannot for the life of them turn themselves around. They become ugly inside-and-out.

    I've also found it strange that girls who backstab me in some way, especially pretty ones, their entire lives fall into ruin just as soon as I'm out of the picture, as if God himself were exacting vengeance on them.

    Their money evaporates, their health suddenly vanishes, their voices become frog-like, they break out in zits, they gain weight rapidly, and they remain cruel hags. Where once they could forge a fake smile my way while plotting ill, suddenly they can barely contain their hatred. And they always seem to think it was my fault, when I didn't do jack to them.

    I tell you, with some of them, if the transformation happened any faster, it'd be like Evanora in Oz the Great and Powerful when her necklace gets broken.

    0|2
    0|0
    • Wow you must have been rejected a lot by girls in that age group to be so bitter. I am in my 40's now and am STILL hit on by guys of all ages all the time. No woman 'in her 30's' looks like garbage, what kind of manipulative BS is that?

      I think lots of insecure men not getting laid try to scare younger women with this brainwashing garbage so they will have lower standards and take the fat/ugly guy out of fear.

      Truth is, women are more viable just as long (if not longer) than men are sexually, looks-wise, etc., and no way - NO WAY is any female in her 30's considered 'ugly' outside of the jerk-off she might have rejected.

      Men lose a lot as they get older, trust me, I have dated them, I know... sexually they aren't as good, they get needy, jealous, fatter, etc. But not until 40's and beyond.

    • Show All
    • Good for you mom to step in and help. Sorry you live in a town where all you have to pick from, in your book, is white trash. Maybe you need to relocate and stop being a momma's boy.

    • @BrunetteNYC : I'm not. However, it is hard to find a job that allows me to pay for all my living expenses. I need to stay close to family on slow work weeks, or else I'd be unable to eat or pay rent on my paltry paychecks. In return for keeping me off the street, they do meddle a lot in my life. That being said, I didn't ask for her help in finding a date. She went out of her way to find the current gal, because she has faith that gal and I are a good fit. And when asking about my progress, is tired of hearing horror stories.

  • A lot of this isn't true. I wanna start with the third picture, because it's glaring at me. I'd actually probably pick the one who gives me more "signs". Either that or the one with the nicest ass, because boobs are ehh to me.

    I don't believe attractive females are half court shots. I think each one are free throws. They can either be easy or difficult. Depends on the person shooting them (in reference to free throw shooting) as well.

    Same could be said for "average females". I think what most females realize with me is that I treat the ones who are "average" to me no different than the ones who are hot/sexy to me. Still a free throw shot. Both are.

    I've noticed that easy lays come in different appearances, so I don't worry about it. I don't over think it. Either I'm catching a lob or I'm shooting a free throw.

    2|2
    0|0
  • Here is my like sir!
    I also believe that the average isn't ugly. It should not be used as a byword

    1|4
    0|0
    • ha thanks!

      I don't know what word to use then to not offend

  • i appreciate in the pics the girls as average and beautiful were actually average and beautiful and not media high standard perceptions as is usually seen on most of such sites.

    tbh, its better to go for the pretty girl and get rejected, i mean keep going for it with a different one, eventually you could have a pretty partner, there won't be insecurities in the relationship based on physical appeal of either and tbh, the average looking girls usually are way more promiscuous than the beautiful ones which makes it even less worth it. They are kind of like female versions of zyzz (lol, dunno why i thought of him here), they dont sleep around as much for the gratification as it is for approval

    0|1
    0|0
  • I like this article it hits home for me. I do this all the time when talking to girls. When I had a crush on this gorgeous girl I found it very hard to approach her, say a simple hello and interact, interact? Ha ha ha hell no lol that's not happening but deep down I wanted to so bad. During that time in my social circle I started approaching girls that I liked but I wasn't nessesary "crushing hard " on them. I found it easy for some reason to talk to them then my crush. I'm not crushing on her as bad anymore but she's still very attractive to me and there is walls around us that I believe I build with no intention. I still find it hard to talk to her, but the others I'm awesome with, that's has happen all my young adult life. I really want to change that.

    0|1
    0|0
    • it will with time

    • Yes sir! I mean I talk to a whole variety of people on a daily basis do to my job and that includes attractive women, but I never get to flirt much or close the deal to ask for a date and all but with time like you said 👍🏻😀

  • I actually only go for very attractive 7-9 looking girls and would never lower those standards. Yeah I've faced a lot of rejection but all I need is not that works out in the end, it's not about what's easiest. It's about what's worth it.

    0|1
    0|0
    • good man

    • Sorry all I need is one that works out in the end not "not that works out" haha

      Some call it shallow but I'm not looking to rack up a sex count I want something real and there are hot girls who are very rude I wouldn't touch however looks are needed. Given how I'd treat a 7-9 looking girl if we got along and got together, they can call me shallow all they want it doesn't phase me, I'd give her everything.

  • Go for the attractive girl, in my experience the less attractive the girl the more issues she has, and she'll take them out on you, looks dont even count with these crazies, the cuter the girl the saner she is.

    0|1
    0|0
  • You know what? I think you are into something here. My current girlfriend by standards is very attractive: She is 5'7, blond with green eyes, skinny, big round eyes, with long eyelashes and long hair that touches her tailbone. She has super nice and everything has being going pretty well. Actually when i met her, i was like you know what, i just told her when i met her that i liked her and that i w as thinking of getting something serious, i even went all the way to tell her that i wanted to sleep with her. Everything worked perfectly

    0|0
    0|0
  • I'd rather get to know them. The reason is looks draw us in yes, but the most attractive in many occasions have more baggage. The more attractive or at times more insecure. I want to hear her intelligence, see her personality, and attitude. Looks are deceiving and fleeting over time. You may have looks and none of these qualities then your just eye candy and boring.

    1|0
    0|0
  • I don't know what average is anymore :(

    1|1
    0|0
  • nice take

    0|1
    0|0
  • Let me tell u. a lot of the hot girls get dates but get fucked and kicked to the curb because they got shit personalities. Average girls find husbands while the hot chick goes through all this trouble and carries all the baggage often. This also happens

    0|0
    0|0
    • just saying, there are some girls that have been gifted with both looks and personality.

    • Show All
    • @damnwinter were all programmed to take the path of least resistance and yes they find their own and it doesn't develope into inner beauty much. suffering... scarcity... rejection are things that make you beautiful and tolerante and enlightened on the inside. rough seas also make skilled sailors.

    • I'm sorry, I didn't quite catch that. But the fact that you genuinely don't believe that there are beautiful girls with good personalities on this whole planet is problematic.

  • I only make friends with girls who are 7's or higher.

    0|0
    0|0
  • I woudl pick the smaller breasted one ANY day.
    cf.girlsaskguys.com/.../...4-b266-aae28118fabd.jpg

    0|1
    0|0
  • I agree, many "average" girls are insecure - but then again, so are guys... I remember a post by a guy who got approached by a pretty girl and he blew her off because he thought it was a set up...

    0|0
    0|0
    • yea even when guys know logically they're not being set up i think they still probably feel that way if they think the girl is hotter than they themselves are capable of "getting"

  • all these girls are average lol
    also this is a fail post

    0|2
    0|0
  • There is no one person that everyone is going to think is good looking. How ugly or how attractive someone is depends on who you ask. Just because you put someone in a certain category based on looks does not mean that everyone else will.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Where does the vs part come in? I was expecting a "round one" and everything.

    0|0
    0|0
  • both attractive to me. I find what's truly attractive is someone attractived to you lol

    0|0
    0|0
  • More from Guys
    3
Loading...