Guys: Here's What's You're Getting Wrong About Girls

Anonymous

A lot of guys I know claim they simply don't get women. "They're confusing/difficult/impossible to figure out!", they say. "I did everything, I don't know why it didn't work!" is among the most common complaints. But as time passes and I get more experienced with men, I notice ever more clearly that most of them tend to have the same problems and misunderstandings when it comes to girls. Here's where they're wrong.

Real life girls are simple

Guys: Here's What's You're Getting Wrong About Girls

I know what Hollywood's been selling. I know many girls are fooled by that too. But trust me: most girls are chill. Most girls would rather sit on the street and have a kebab while talking to you freely and honestly rather than have you spend one third of your monthly income on an awkward first date dinner. You don't have to spend big on girls. Listening to them, being open and honest and genuinely having fun will always be a better option.

Stop idealizing girls

Guys: Here's What's You're Getting Wrong About Girls

A lot of guys, especially insecure ones, seem to think all they need in life is a beautiful, smart, quirky woman who will rescue them from their bottomless self-pity pit of despair and show them that life is awesome. But newsflash: girls are human beings. Girls have flaws, get sad, moody, tired. Girls have needs just as much as you do. They are people too and they won't "save" you, so don't expect them to.

If you listen, there won't be an issue

You don't know why she's mad at you, or been acting cold, or treating you like garbage? It's probably because you didn't listen to her. That is the most common mistake and the most tiring one: you can't understand someone you barely pay attention to except when it comes to sex. If you know her and truly listen to what she has to say, I guarantee you will know she's mad because of x, cold because of y, shutting you out because of z and you both will be able to fix it with the minimum amount of drama. It's not rocket science.

Guys: Here's What's You're Getting Wrong About Girls
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Most Helpful Guy

  • AleDeEurope
    1) True. Girls aren't difficult, and good girls basically just want to enjoy a nice time with the guy they like. If you like someone, sitting on the curb eating a kebab with that person can be an amazing time.
    You said this on a site where most people haven't spent much time with the opposite gender. Guys here think women just want you to spend your whole pay on them, and girls think that life is like a Disney/Hollywood movie where they're a princess.

    2) Sooo true. I've been saying this for a loooong time. If you idealize women, you're putting them above you, and that gets you nowhere especially since it show lack of confidence and women love confident men. This mentality will also negatively affect some women who will think they're the shit and that they deserve everything (thinking they're princesses, like I said before).

    3) I somewhat agree with this point. It's true that sometimes, the solution is just to listen, but some girls are very difficult to have them tell you exactly the problem. Sometimes you sit down with them and ask them to tell you what's going on, but they still don't tell you what the real issue is.
    But more guys need to actually sit down and listen, do their part, and let her do her part.

    I think this is a nice Take for this site... it's kind of obvious what you said, but with the people we have here, these needs to be said.
    Is this still revelant?
    • Anonymous

      Thank you for being the first person who somewhat disagrees and is still polite!!! I agree with you that many girls are complicated when it comes to that but I gotta be very general here. A lot of guys complain about that but they don't even try to see where the problem is because "oh, women are soooo confusing". Obviously listening to your partner won't always solve things and there will be times when you really won't understand but my point was - at least TRY to!!!

    • Exactly. I completely agree with that. That's why at the end I said that the guy should do his part by listening, and let her do her part by opening up, cause if the guy doesn't listen, she will never open up, that's a fact.

    • Paul09

      That's it? Just listen? But do they listen back? A few dates, Im sitting there and just listening. Barely give you a chance to respond. Don't get to know you because they do most of the talking. Doesn't work lol

    • Show All

Most Helpful Girl

  • singleforsix
    I disagree. I see many women who pretend to be someone they are not to win a man... they pretend to like sports or whatever else they need to. As women we get mad when a man tries to sleep with us, mad when he doesn't try and sleep with us, say he calls to much, too little. We do send mixed messages and men are tired of it. I know several of my friends date men based on income/possessions. Philosophy: I can already take care of myself so I need a man that can take care of me. Total BS if you ask me, but there are women like that... and those women are what ruin it for the other women who are not like that.
    Is this still revelant?
    • Bravo!!!

    • roamer

      I was going to comment above but I see you already said it better—I predict a lonely future for anonymous.

    • FatherJack

      Excellent comment & this is why many men simply give up on even mere dating.." and those women are what ruin it for the other women who are not like that." , sadly these are in the majority of women.

    • Show All

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What Girls & Guys Said

1049
  • godfatherfan
    Simple or not, women don't know how to be straight forward like men. We just say what is wrong. we don't play games. Women feel a man should be able to read minds, none of us can. they hint, or pout, and it is frustrating. I was with my ex wife 25 years and I still don't understand women. That is why I gave up dating.
  • GraveTruth
    Oh, here we go. What's this?
    the 40 millionth article where the guy is not doing something right or needs to do something.

    WHY is it' the MANS responsibility always?
  • Rawrzz
    I get women. In my view, most men *and* women don't get the opposite sex. Because we are naturally different, yet the same. So, people tend to project themselves onto others, approaching the situation from internal understanding of that "sameness", while not accounting for innate differences.

    As for your points, I think any guy who has even so much as talked to a girl IRL knows this stuff. But, I'd also add that there are quite a few girls who endeavor to "fix" men. So, it's not out of the question that some chick would try to "save" a guy, if she saw sufficient worth or potential worth in him. Ultimately, we can only save ourselves, but other people can help. A lot.

    As for the cold point, I wouldn't know. Listening has never been a problem for me. Though, it has also been my experience that when a woman is mad, oftentimes she won't talk about it and expect you to innately understand what you did wrong. Or play games and use tests as a means to determine things that she could just outright ask you about. Which I find really ironic, because women are said/supposed to be better at communication than men. I guess that's neither here nor there, but, stream of consciousness.
  • Bananaman177
    Women think they understand men, men know they don't understand women.

    That's the biggest difference between the genders.

    • Shorty1991

      But some men seem to think they understand women and they don't.

    • @Shorty1991 I never met a guy claiming that, but maybe.

  • ThisDudeHere
    "or treating you like garbage? It's probably because you didn't listen to her"

    There is never a reason to treat your loved one as garbage. How about instead of doing that, you make them listen first? Don't just expect them to do it when they're not doing it. Make them do it.
  • Notorisch_Arschloch
    The trouble you ladies have with us guys is that we look at your past and what you do, not the things you say, which never match. Because of this, not only do we get you, but it is very simple for us to do so. Trouble is, we ACTUALLY get you, not what you wish we'd believe, because we judge actions, not words.

  • I very, very, VERY much agree with point 1!

    Too many guys, put way too much focus on trying to impress and WOW! the girl. The key to a date, especially in the beginning, is to spend quality time in each other's company. Go for coffee, or smoothies, or go get a meal at a diner. Simple stuff! Stop trying so damn hard to impress! :-D
  • RandomBritishGuy94
    "You don't know why she's mad at you, or been acting cold, or treating you like garbage? It's probably because you didn't listen to her."

    Or she's not a nice rational person. You can't blame the guy if the women goes a little crazy (and vice-versa).

    The rest was about right. Some men seem to forget that, for better or worse, women are just people. This means some are nice people, some aren't. Some are loud, and some aren't.
  • LittleSally
    I was confused by the title of your first point because I was thinking you meant about the way we think... but your explanation is correct. Honestly, I've never known a woman who expects a man to pay for a dinner or something extreme. Maybe a ticket to the movies... or a coffee and that's it.
    All your points are on point.

    Nice take!
  • kellyg83
    There is one problem I have with this. I have noticed that a lot of girls, and I used to do the same thing, will stand by and expect him to "take the hint." They act cold, and mean when they have a problem, but they just won't spit it out. This was the number one problem I had with my fiance. Boys are not psychics, and they aren't going to know the problem just because you're a couple and "should be on the same wave length." Now that I finally get this, I have no issue spitting out my feelings or issues.
  • TCJ1234567
    go as far as saying girls are easy to understand, they send mixed signals, they will tell you they want one thing and go after another.

    That being said, I agree. 99.99% of all issues in a relationship come down to communicating with your partner. Not keeping your mouth shut while she talks, but actively listening to her.
  • Djaaaaay
    This only pertains to insecure boys , if any !! Men of experience never act like this what so ever. And to add guys are not confused about girls like you wished they were , so this take I find irreverently not really true. That being said , Seriously?
    • Djaaaaay

      Women /girls aren't that hard to figure out , just thier lies are !!

  • cth96190
    The key to understanding women is to realise that they are driven by narcissism and hypergamy.
    All other behaviours can be traced back to those two motivations.
  • CasaNorba
    "If you listen, there won't be an issue"

    this is 100,000% incorrect. throughout life I've learned that more you listen to a women the more insane you will end up in the long run. if you are really trying to reasoning with us please inform with the real stuff, we are sick of hearing all that sugar coated bullshit coming from women themselves.

    PS: @Mrwoo99 couldnt of said it any better
    • Mrwoo99

      Women say one thing but statistics, books, millions of mens experiences and visuals say another...

    • CasaNorba

      @Mrwoo99 exactly! that's why they say that when you want to learn how to fish you always ask the fishermen for tips and advice. you dont jump into the pond and ask the fishes themselves

    • Mrwoo99

      The problem is neo-feminism and the occults social cultural engineering and it's effect on today's modern women. The problem is not women declaring whether they're feminists or not, it's the indoctrination in western civilisation of neo-feminism which is brainwashing women. Feminism is programming their toxic values in to women through media, society manipulation and cultural Marxism. It's the same way being born and programmed from birth in to an othordox Islamic nation, you don't have the choice to be Christian in those countries and would automatically end up a Muslim lile the rest of the nation.

      It's the same over here with feminism when women shame women who value femininity or traditionalism as being sexist and misogynistic.

    • Show All
  • Usersame
    Nice try, but women really are complicated. Most of the time they don't know what they are doing, and i'm speaking from expirience.
    Quite a lot of women i met pretend what they are doing makes sense, but don't act consistently and cofuse people. Then when they fck up big time, they expect the guy to clean their mess.
  • matt1209
    Not listening isn't always the case of not knowing women are mad. Especially when they don't tell you the real reason or give you the silent treatment. Sometimes girls need to be more vocal why they are mad or more willing to workout the problem.
  • frozenhorizon
    All guys I know pay attention and listen to girls. Just paying attention doesn't mean it will work out if you both have fundamentally conflicting principles. But yeah everything else is good to keep in mind.
  • Luci92
    I agree with this completely.
    I also think some users on here really need to take note of what you've said.
  • Prügletten
    Women are barely simple. From all women I know, there is just one who is simple and yes I know more than 1 woman ;)

    If you marry, if you wanna have children, if you believe in true love, you have to generalize women. If there isn't the perfect woman for you how should marriage last for eternity?
  • CancerianMan81
    you say a lot of men are insecure huh most men don't have insecurities cause they don't hide behind their mistakes like most women do we can all point the finger on who's really in the wrong here but it ain't doing us any favors by saying who really is in the wrong
  • Mrwoo99
    Looks, money and status is the key to a womans heart.

    Trust me... us guys know what we see with our eyes.
  • Love_Is_Eternal
    Such bullshit. Why would I want to listen to what women say? Most of what they say is bullshit and just drives me insane.
    • Lulzy. A common joke among my friends and I:

      What did she say?

      How would I know... A female was speaking, you think I was listening?

  • Kuraj
    *Eyeroll*
    We "get you".
    You don't have to spend big, but you have to spend something because then you are cheap, you also better have a stable job with respectable income because who else is going to take care of your kids while you stay at home right?
    Don't "idolize us", but you better pamper us with frequent displays of affection, put us on the pedestal, listen to our every word and make us the point of your whole life.
    And you better not expect us to provide you with values in return because that makes you a selfish asshole who doesn't deserve us the way you are because you are all the most special snowflakes out there.
  • Loveherbut
    I think the only good point here is don't idealize women
  • DarkHumorRUs
    Funny enough, this doesn't fix the issue of not being able to find a girl to date.
  • Paul34
    No point of wasting my time on reading this whole mytake, I just read the reasons. Why can't us guy can focus on ourselves without the possibility of having a girl?
    • Paul34

      Until laws are changed to menfair guys, I won't waste my time on a single stuck-up, nascisstic whore!

  • pavlove
    Yeah, i originally stopped doing the fancy date because i was going out with so many girls and it was getting pricey but you're right most times i find the shittier the date the more fun a girl has.
  • nice take.
    explained in a (somewhat generalized and simplified way) the basis of a good and REALISTIC rl haha.
    well done ;)
  • castratedwhiteguy
    What do you do when some chick, who I loved, wanted me to beat the shit out of her better and harder than the other guy she's seeing? Pardon me if I just don't get the message...
  • Tony1974
    Here's what I think about your last point: BULLSHIT!!! You're not a 2 year old child and I won't put up with a grown woman throwing a temper-trantrum. Cut your passive-aggressive bullshit and speak your mind. I'm not going to guess which of you million and one issues I wasn't giving 100% of my attention to... stop being so damn psychotic and get over yourselves. Contrary to popular belief, the world doesn't revolve around you. I don't understand the logic: I'm upset with you for X so I won't talk to you. I'm going to freeze you out until you give in to my demands. How very grown up of you. And this is how you treat somebody you "supposedly" LOVE/LIKE? I can only imagine what you do to people you hate...
  • saksaksakaway
    never ever try to figure out a women just learn how to treat them
  • skeptic002
    I never listen when girls give advice to men about girls, sometimes I ask questions just to see what they say it's usually wrong
    • I listen. And make my own judgement on whether to adhere. I ALWAYS squash a girl when she says: "Don't judge.". I WILL judge. Live with it.

    • JoyGirl

      @skeptic002
      It is usually wrong? Bhahaha... lol
      You think guys give better advice on women? 😂
      Ok ooo... ( '-')

    • skeptic002

      @JoyGirl when it comes to getting women men give better advice then women, women are so confused about so much

  • FutureMee
    The thing is i do get women. I find them easy to understand.
    • Same here, the key is to understand biological urges, and not give in to all this new age, gender ambiguity stuff

  • Unit1
    Nice ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)-b
    I hope that's true. Gotta meet some amazing ladies ♥
  • iceEverestere
    Great take. Preach. I think guys already know this. Though it was nice
  • JustWorthlessMe
    I learned the truth about women long ago... if you look good, everything is unimportant to you.
  • Scrambledagain
    Girls are more complicated than quantum physics.
  • Blitzkrieger
    If you say so.
  • nolookingbackx
    Good myTake.
  • AriadneSky
    good take! :)
  • Stmarco
    Wow that was terrible
  • Phoenix98
    Common sense basically.
  • Stevan7
    This is really good. I love this take!
  • Adigelunar
    thats good
  • mits777
    Spot on article
  • MissSakura
    thanks for sharing...
  • Anonymous
    I dunno, I do listen. And I think this is definitely correct for really sweet and Genuine (capital G) girls. Definitely. Good take if it's about those ones.

    But a lot of confused girls, sadly no matter how good a person you are, they still play games or demonstrate bouts of craziness. Same applies to guys the other way round.

    However, I do think for some women they are their own worst enemy. I actually wrote a question trying to decipher the workings of a girl, can you help me out, it's a two parter?

    www.girlsaskguys.com/.../q2200664-why-do-girls-read-reply-later-on-whatsapp-even-to-friends-potential

    www.girlsaskguys.com/.../q2182612-how-d-a-woman-act-around-these-guys-do-they-allow-some-men-to-get
  • Anonymous
    they got nothing wrong about girls. girls re superficial bitches especial till 30... .
  • Anonymous
    Women are manipulative, deceitful, liars, and very superficial. I'm not wasting my time trying to figure out the minds of the defective because that's exactly what women are, defective.
  • Anonymous
    Complete and utter bullcrap
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