The Difference Between "LOVE" & "love".

[amandaschwartz]

Here are some difference that I have found between someone who LOVES you, versus someone who "claims" to love you.

1. He will do the little things

When you really love someone you think about that person, and what you can do to make their life a better place. Whether it is a cute love note, or even a favorite dessert of theirs, you want to brighten their day. Little things like text messages, or compliments go a long way.

2. You're his priority

Sure he is busy with work, and family and 30 other things, but he makes time for you. He would rather spend time with you than go out partying with his friends. You're not an option, you're the priority.

3. You over him

He will put you over him. If you want pizza for dinner and he wants tacos, he will go for pizza because he cares about what you want. If going shopping for three hours makes you happy, he will do it.

4. Ego and pride are on the back burner

Simple. In an argument he will give you a hug, or apologize just to calm you down and reassure you that he loves you, although you may be the one in the wrong. He will do so because his love for you is greater than his need to be right and stick to his guns. Doesn't make him weak, makes him a loving man.

5. His actions > His words

He doesn't spend time telling you how much he loves you, he shows you. He will treat you with respect, show you off to his family and friends, and you will feel a genuine quality about him.

[lumos]

Well sure, but it goes both ways. If the both of you have pizza because you wanted it, you should offer to go for tacos tomorrow. If you went shopping for 3 hours today, you should offer to go do something he likes tomorrow. You will put him over yourself. You will do the little things. Your actions will matter more than your words. You will apologize to him in a fight and make sure he knows that you love him.
You can't have someone do all these things for you and not give anything back in return, because that wouldn't be love.

[realperson02]

at least someone being fair on here.

[coachTanthony]

This take describes the biggest beta male pussy on the planet. This is where the girl cheats on him because all he does is say YES to everything. If shopping for 3 hours makes you happy he will do it because he is a beta male and is scared you might break up with him if he doesn't comply. Women unfortunately don't like YES MEN... they want a man who stands up for himself. This guy described will get cheated on in the end or left drooling in a closet full of women's shoes.

[lovelyhoneybones]

My father is the very definition of an alpha male, and guess what, when my mother or my sisters and I want to go shopping he goes with us because he understands that is what makes us happy. Males in today's society think that saying yes to a woman makes them man-ginas, but it doesn't. It takes a real man to put his ego aside and do what pleases the woman/women (in-case of having daughters or other female family members) that he loves.

[coachTanthony]

@lovelyhoneybones Apples and Oranges... that is totally different and not even close to what i was referring too. What you are describing is simply called family responsibility... not two people dating and the guy just said's YES to everything.

[lovelyhoneybones]

That still applies when you're dating someone. When do you think you set down the grounds for this stuff; when you're still dating. There is nothing wrong with telling your girlfriend yes. Obviously I agree with you about not saying yes to everything, but there is nothing wrong with accompanying your partner to the mall to make her happy. Females would gladly do the same thing.

[coachTanthony]

@lovelyhoneybones My opinion was directed towards a much broader picture of the guy she describes in her take.. . so I don't want to get into back and forth on some random guy going to the mall with his girl. That is out of context. So agree to disagree.

[btbc92]

Well, I agree to some extent. But I will say you have to re-word the phrase: "He will put you over him". Wrong. He would be subservient to you and others, and likewise, you need to do the same before he thinks about himself or yourself. Out of free will. There needs to be balance with this otherwise that can be misinterpreted. As far you being a priority. Not when your dating. Marriage, yes. But it is an option to be with you, and it's his choice if he wants to prioritize you. But men show love in different ways, and that has to be respected, or else it's not the right kind of relationship for you. I agree with #5, with #4, however it's 50/50 for me on this one. Most men would rather distance themselves and think rationally because they can't handle emotionally charged arguments. Neither should they have to. But I agree that IF ONLY you are open to him wanting to hug you, that he should make the attempt. But it nevertheless determines if he does or doesn't. It's about his personality and character. If it's part of his personality to give you hugs, then that's great. But it's always good to communicate better than to expect that from him. And the title should be also called 'The difference between 'Being in Love' vs 'Loving somebody'. Just to add. But everything else is great so far. I enjoyed the read. And would be interested in other myTakes.

[mjz00]

wow, as i read this complete fantasy i then had to look who posted it, im surprised by your age, if you have had this or believe in this you are going to be sorely disappointed in life, yes these things are lovely and could be a part of a loving relationship from both sides not just his, at best these kind of gestures are paramount in the early days of a relationship and will subside with time, whether that is right or not, your working hard, your knackered at the end of the day, he is a lazy git and you end up doing all the house work, or you have a baby and his life is the same getting out there in the normal world and you now a human with nothing but a baby and kids tv that i promise you, you will find yourself watching like a fucking zombie... the more you crave him coming home and turn a bit crazy the more he will avoid you, its hell on earth, you will hate him and the fact you are a woman and men get it so fuckin easy... he will say why is it so messy what you been doing all day... and nobody but a mother can understand at this point you could stab him in the jugular quite happily. i could go on and on, basically this is a truer description of love, as a woman, you have been stripped of everything you once were, in a place youve never felt so alone, so distant from your man, an abyss, at this point it is LOVE that tethers you to this realm from which you are so far detached no one can save you but pure LOVE itself has the ability to bring all this back together hunny thats love xx

[Crapulux]

This is a nice guide on how to get a self-entitled bitch to walk all over you and then dump you.

Point 1- Agree.
Point 5- Agree. Showing is more powerful than telling. Therefore, I will ask: what kind of behavior are you showing?
Point 2- What have you done to deserve being his priority? If your answer is "nothing besides bitch" then don't be surprised you are not his priority.
Point 3 - Is this a joke? 50/50 is the rule.
Point 4 - I can see your own ego certainly is not on the back burner.

> In an argument he will apologize just to calm you down

Nope. Apologizing when one is right is simply being weak.

> and reassure you that he loves you, although you may be the one in the wrong.

Nope. If you're wrong, you're wrong. You get to apologize.

> He will do so because his love for you is greater than his need to be right

Nope.

> Doesn't make him weak

Yep. It makes him a pussy, and you will hate him for it.

Every time I applied your advice, it failed. Every time I behaved as I should have, it worked.

You need to be introduced to the concept of a good, loving, thorough hate-fuck. End of story.

[datdopegirl]

You are a complete and utter jerk :)

[mjz00]

have to agree point 3 i actually thought that when i read this, was it just to provoke?

[FýrdracaDócincel]

Unlike some of these other people I won't get on your butt about you not mentioning things that YOU will do, as this MyTake clearly isn't about that. But let's see what I CAN get on your butt about.

1. "He will do the little things"
Fair enough.

2. "You're his priority"
Okay, no real problems there.

3. "You over him"
Umm, no. What I'll do is get myself tacos and get her pizza. And, no. I'm not going shopping for 3 hours.

4. "Ego and pride are on the back burner"
It's not a matter of 'pride.' It's a matter of who is right and who is not. If you are not right, then you simply will not win. It's basic argument cause and effect. Until she backs down and apologizes for any unnecessary flipping out, she will receive zero effort towards calming her down.

5. "His actions > His words"
Agreed

[lordpokerface]

This isn't an exhaustive list, but is one of the truest things I've ever seen on the topic. Relationships cannot be successful without a bit of sacrifice on both sides. I feel like slapping someone across the face when they whine about why they aren't able to keep relationships alive when they're busy spending time with everyone apart from their partner.

[I-am-a-nobody]

As usual, I agree with what @btbc92 said.
She's right so often she gets on my nerves sometimes. (ha ha)

Good MyTake with the assumption she is likewise demonstrating her love.

On 4...
Sometimes, I'll go out for a walk after a heated "discussion".
My wife is usually the more calm one. We always come to agreement. Usually within 24 hours. Patience is exercised on both sides.

[SecretAsianGirl]

Point 1: I agree with this one.
Point 2: I don't see any problem with this as long as you make him YOUR priority as well.
Point 3: No. A relationship has to be 50/50. No question about it.
Point 4: If he's wrong, fine. If you're in the wrong, then you'd better be prepared to swallow your pride and apologize.
Point 5: Okay, now this one I agree with.

[Anonymous]

This is why guys avoid relationships. Nowhere in this list you're saying what YOU will do for him. If I were a guy, I would say that this looks like a whole lotta work and I don't need it. I'd rather have one of those friends with benefits deals. All fun, no work!

[realperson02]

And this is the hardcore truth. And women wonder why guy's don't want want relationships.

[Icyfire101]

So your definition of love is a one sided relationship where the male does everything and gets no affection in return? That's not love, that's just sad 😒

[Iraqveteran666]

You sound very high maintenance and expect a partner to be a complete push over mèeting your demands 24/7 and getting nothing in return.

[theresat0]

I think another big thing is general effort to spend time with you and contact you, even if they're awkward.

[TheUsername27]

So love consists of men doing everything for women... what do you do in return? A man must adhere to what i want for dinner otherwise our relationship is not right... hmm...

[Anonymous]

"LOVE" is when he saves the last pink Starburst for you

[Anonymous]

Pinks, this take is why guys only are concerned about getting laid.

[JoyGirl]

Well, done on your myTake! 👏😊

[John_Doesnt]

This sounds demanding.

[lord_chilled]

why can't we have tacos AND pizza? i like both?

[Unit1]

True! True.

[Anonymous]

great!