I feel it is important for me to create awareness for those who may have not understand the concept of consent in sex. Also for those who may have not seen the video animation titled "Consent: It's as simple as tea."
The content below does not belong to me. You can watch the video (link below) but I'm going to just type everything out for you because... I know many of you don't even want to click on the video. Maybe you prefer reading than watching, right?
Consent and Tea
If you’re still struggling with consent, just imagine instead of initiating sex, you’re making them a cup of tea.
You say, “Hey would you like a cup of tea?”
And they go, “Oh my god, I would love a cup of tea! Thank you!”
Then you know they want a cup of tea.
If you say, “Hey, would you like a cup of tea?”
And they’re like, “Ummm… you know I’m not really sure…”
Then you can make them a cup of tea, or not, but be aware that they might not drink it.
And if they don’t drink it then, and this is the important bit: Don’t make them drink it.
Just because you made it, doesn’t mean you’re entitled to watch them drink it.
And if they say, “No thank you.”
Then don’t make them tea. At all. Just don’t make them tea. Don’t make them drink tea. Don’t get annoyed at them not wanting tea. They just don’t want tea, okay?
They might say, “Yes please, that’s kind of you.”
And then when the tea arrives, they actually don’t want the tea at all.
Sure, that’s kind of annoying as you’ve gone through the effort of making the tea but they remain under no obligation to drink the tea. They did want tea, now they don’t.
Some people change their mind in the time it takes to boil the kettle, brew the tea and add the milk. It’s okay for people to change their mind, and you are still not entitled to watch them drink it.
And if they’re unconscious, don’t make them tea. Unconscious people don’t want tea and they can’t answer the question, “Do you want tea?” because they’re unconscious.
Okay maybe they were conscious when you asked them, “Do you want tea?” and they said “Yes” and in the time it took you to boil the kettle, brew the tea and add the milk they’re now unconscious. You should just put the tea down, make sure the unconscious person is safe. And this is the important part again: Don’t make them drink the tea.
They said yes then, sure, but unconscious people don’t want tea.
If someone said yes to tea, started drinking it and passed out before they finished it, don’t keep pouring it down their throat.
Take the tea away, make sure they are safe because unconscious people don’t want tea. Trust me on this.
If someone said yes to tea around your house last Saturday, that doesn’t mean they want you to make them tea all the time. They don’t want you to come around to their place unexpectedly and make them tea and force them to drink it going, “But you wanted tea last week.” Or to wake up to find you pouring tea down their throat going, “But you wanted tea last night?”
If you can completely understand how ludicrous it is to force people to have tea when they don’t want tea; and you are able to understand when people don’t want tea then – how hard it is to understand when it comes to sex?
Whether it’s tea or sex, consent is everything.
And on that note, I’m going to make myself a cup of tea.
Now, I'm going to put in my bit...
If you feel you were being forced to "drink tea" (have sex) then you have the right to report it -- that is sexual assault, unwanted sexual contact.
Even if he says, "But rape is women's number one sexual fantasy!" Right, fine. He can say that to the court. Hint: I'm sure a few of you might notice such opinion being posted on here.
This post is gender-neutral, men can also be victims of sexual assault although not always.
I hope some of you might find this helpful. Thank you for reading.
Most Helpful Opinions