It would depend on what variety of feminist you are. Are you a gender feminist that believes that male and females only behave as they do because of social constructs? Are you a equity feminist that believes in equal opportunity or do you believe in equality of outcomes? Are you a marxist feminist that believes we need to destroy all the social institutions of the Patriarchy? It's not so simple as there are a 100 flavors of feminist.
Gender equality is a noble cause but it means different things to different people. Just because someone does not believe in a dogmatic ideology does not make them a sexist, a bigot or a misogynist. They are just of the belief feminism is not the way to achieve it. I would say the majority of people fit into this category since only about 20% of people identify as feminists. This being because the methods to achieve equality that many disagree with cannot be separated from the label.
I have indicated that I am unlikely to get along with a feminist in my profile. That is my preference. Why do I want to bother dating someone who allows her beliefs to be guided by an ideology I believe is at best inherently flawed and at worst incredibly damaging. I'm saving both parties time.
I didn't think I would get a response over a month after I posted this question. Thank you for your input.
Some are acting like kids throwing their toys out of the pram and trying to make a loud enough noise to attract attention in the vain hope it will change things.
Some know you wouldn't date them anyway and are trying to pull a "You can't fire me, I quit!" maneuver. lol
Personally, I wouldn't care if she was a feminist. I might prefer it, I might not. You can't really decide based on something like that in my opinion. On my list of requirements and desirable qualities in a woman, the issue of feminism is never anywhere to be seen which is odd when you consider that I've gotten stick from some guys here for saying I'm a feminist.
Thank you for your opinion. Very enlightened. I enjoyed reading it.
I realize now that that sounded very sarcastic but I assure you it was sincere.
I'm not sure if the ones u are speaking about are really feminists. I consider myself a feminist because I respect myself, other women and men even more so. How do u expect them to respect us if we come about it from a place of hatred and a false sense of intitlement? Does that even justify bashing other ppl? No. Of course I am totally against the injustices that women nowadays suffer at the hands of some very poorly educated men.
Ok flower crown.
U calling me a hippie? :D well thank u since they preach peace.
That's basically my opinion :) Luckily, I managed to find a fellow feminist to date and it's working well, he's helped teach me a lot.
It's not actually that hard. There are more people who are feminists than people who aren't in this day and age.
That's good :)
so true.. but prepare for outrages of angry feminist-hating men lol
Opinion
32Opinion
It's absurd to infer that men who want nothing to do with feminists are as you describe. You will have extreme difficulty, finding a man, who believes women to be sandwhich making vaginas etc Thats just silly. Furthermore, i think you'r much more likely to be treated better by a non feminist man.
As i think that many of these cringy "male feminists" are often part of the pathetic minority of men, who will do anything to get laid, and those sort of men are seldom prepared to commit to a proper relationship. Over the past several years, i have had to endure from feminists. Many hateful articles in various publications, a mountain of hate online. Campaigns against "manspreading" "mansplaining" and "toxic masculinity" etc etc
I even learned of an astonishly large group of feminists, who have been campaigning, against increasing the very low budget for prostate cancer research; as they would like to see more men die from cancer. Saying that you have to support this political movement if you believe in equal rights; sounds almost cult -like. Like saying you have to be a christian if you believe in god. It seems archaic for a person to identify as a feminist in 2020.
As women have had equal rights for a very long time. It's like someone introducing themselves as being an anti apartheid activist. Hence if someone says they are a feminist, then i assume they support modern feminism. Which has nothing to do with equal rights that women already have, rather it is fundamentally a far left hate group, it's marxist poison, and i think they victimize themselves.
You may not be that way, but the feminists in power are. For that reason, i have too much self respect, to want anything to do with someone who gleefully tells me they are a feminist. It would make me feel so lowly; that i just can't do it. I have only once dated a girl who started going on about feminism.
It was many years ago and i took her to a persian restaurant. I can't remember much, just that i waited till i had finished my fensjan, before i got up and walked away. If you were a man, then i am sure you would feel the same way.
1. Why would you think that a guy cares what you think of his dating choice? It seems like he's just informing you of his feelings and you're getting all defensive and need to make sure everyone knows you don't care as if to invalidate his choice.
2. I don't think that not dating a feminist has ANYTHING to do with not respecting a woman as a human being. I think it's to do with feminists who jump to that conclusion, like anyone who doesn't march to the feminist drums and drink the kool-aid is automatically a misogynistic asshole.
Can't you see how that simplistic binary mindset where "you're either with me or against me" is just an unattractive trait in a person? ... especially if you're a guy looking to date a girl because that immediately associates you with the "out group."
I'd probably trying dating a feminist but if I feel like they're ignoring men's issues, only focusing on women and just generally demonizing maleness, then to me obviously they're not that mindful of equality and I can't be around that.
"If you don't believe in my worth as a human beyond my vagina or ability to bear children or make you sandwiches"
That's why you think people don't like feminists? That is what you call a strawman argument, isn't it?
When you say idiotic things like that, you can't expect people to want you.
And like another user said, it's voicing an opinion on various questions on this site. No one outside of forums is going around yelling about not wanting feminists. The question gets asked, people answer.
Perhaps a relationship forum (or any internet forum) is just not your cup of tea.
Thank you for your input.
And I made that statement ridiculous on purpose because I think you are all ridiculous.
I'm afraid I don't have the slightest idea what you mean.
Because feminists don't understand the sentimental value that is a woman bringing a child into this world or her making a nice meal, to put it in the narrow perspective youve described.
Good for you that you don't care, you'll get no sympathy from me or the other men who value these two things you exclusively picked on when you can't find a loving, meaningful, fruitful relationship because you're waging a false war of equality in the 21st century
Chivalry is dead and women killed it with feminism.
Says she doesn't care what we think, proceeds to post a question proving that she does care. And what a nice a straw man theory you got there, you get that at the latest slut walk? There has also been some shit that gone down lately in the SJW/feminist crowd that proves what non-feminist men have been saying for a while, male feminist are only saying they are feminist to try to get sex from women. It's also funny how a non-feminist man, such as myself, think women are more than just for sex. It's funny how it works that way.
No one gives a f*ck if you care or not. But apparently, you DO care enough to write this question, which I find ironic. Also, once again, a feminist is wrong and stupid about something and creating another strawman. Feminism =/= "respecting women." If anything, feminists have NO respect for women or women's agency, at all.
But yeah, keeping thinking no self-respecting man not wanting to date an angry, bitter, negative, whiny, insecure, immature, talentless, ungrateful man-hating cunt who has less respect for men than she does women or herself means all men don't respect you, your vagina, or your ability to pop a babies out of your pussy like all female mammals can. I'm sure we're ALL broken up about it.
Now don't you have angry Mary Sue article to write about "how oxygen is sexist, and we REALLY need to talk about it"?
This posting illustrates precisely *why* men won't date feminists.
You all need to realize that men in the United States don't walk around all day plotting how we can oppress women and destroy their lives. This notion that you have that men see women as sandwich-making vaginas is childish, and it shows the shallowness with which you view men. Judging by this posting I doubt you've ever had much interaction with men, other than maybe those in your immediate family.
That is not what a man thinks when he thinks of the word "feminist".
when a man hears the word "feminist' the picture we have is "nasty, inconsiderate, men hating women, many times lesbians, who claim to want to be equal exact for when it comes to asking out guys first or paying for dates".
that may not be what a feminist is, but many women have ruined that word for you women. Because that is what most guys think of.
Perhaps better and more comprehensive education is in order?
sure. But on both the men and women side. Women need to find those that are ridiculously militant and try and tone that down. or make sure your message gets out to the rest of society that those radicals are not representative of Feminism.
I usually just ignore the militant uber-radical ones because there's no reasoning with them.
1.) Don't confuse women and feminists. While I don't respect feminists, I respect women. Think of Germans in WW2: not every German was fascist.
2.) Because over the time you'll get bored having a mangina near you.
Describe.
The difference between respecting women and not respecting women who happen to be feminists.
Feminism is a fascist ideology that lusts for power and advantages without any responsibilities whatsoever based solely on gender. It is useless to lie to me to convince me of thinking otherwise.
When I think of women, I think of my mom: when my father died in 1992 due to poor health (right after collapse of a country), my mom had to take 2 jobs to survive. Using her intelligence, wit and wisdom, she made it through and achieved a rank of a general accountant in a respectable corporation over years. She never asked for any advantages whatsoever, she never had to beg for anything, nor she ever demanded any special treatment because she's a woman. And I respect her a lot; I respect women like this.
While feminists are pretty much "hurr durr I haz a cunt, you fucking male scum are all CEOs and whatnot, make us CEOs because I said so, you misogynists" They are only good at bitching for either failing at life or lack of strength and desire to earn things through hard work, nothing else.
I'm not sure you really understand feminism but thank you for your inout regardless.
No, this is exactly what feminism is. It's a perfect definition.
Can't get something in life? Work is too hard? Men are more competitive than you because men have testosterone? What to do?
Get better? Improve yourself? Suck it up like men do and try again? improve your qualifications?
Nope, just call everybody sexist, create a myth about some kind of "oppression" etc, then push this idea through same walking failures, find some sissies that support same idea (for unknown reason) and there you have a feminism.
Thank you for your input.
"No, this is exactly what feminism is. It's a perfect definition."
hmmm
this is a perfect definition: the advocacy of women's rights on the grounds of political, social, and economic equality to men.
your definition is an opinion, perhaps built out of some scraps of truth but scraps of truth aren't actual truth. your viewpoint which you are entitled to has been skewed by the negative aspects of the feminist movement that have wrongly been labeled as feminism. Feminism is feminism. Fascism is fascism. So the "feminists" who are fascist are in fact NOT feminists at all but fascists.
@madhatters4
It is fascist ideology.
While they tend to focus on "female problems" (although I fail to see any, since in general woman's life is easier in comparison to man's life) in the name of "equality" (I underline for blind/stupid folks "IN THE NAME OF"), they never pay attention to anything where men are at disadvantage, for example having longer terms in jail for same crimes, being drafted to army if shit hits the fan, women being saved first in case of emergency etc.
So, my words about "lust for power and advantages without any responsibilities whatsoever" are absolutely true and very correct.
So a woman that calls herself feminists wasn't born like this: she adopted this ideology via either her stupidity or by being influenced by cancerous liberal media to have an excuse for her failures (instead of blaming herself for failing). And since she adopted a fascist ideology, she is a fascist.
feminism is an ideology an ideology of equal treatment BY IT'S LITERAL DEFINITION. That is all. simple and sweet
@madhatters4
I think I underlined important things for blind/stupid people.
Guess I forgot to include liberals and sissies.
You just mentioned "equal treatment", but you completely ignored the points I've mentioned in a previous post where men are at disadvantage and feminist don't give a single flying fuck about it.
Therefore, it is highly discriminatory ideology and thus fascist.
You fail, s... no, I can't call you "sir". You definitely aren't one.
How exactly is the dictionary definition a valid proof for the groups actions? No one could explain me this so far and I am genuinely curious.
@FakeName123
Is that a question to me or to @madhatters4 ?
A generic rhetorical question adressed to no one.
Feminists who think men who won't date you don't believe in equality, why do you think we care? You're already biased against us based on our gender, blame us for all your problems, and assume that feminism is the only path to equality when it's not even close. It's not even on the same road as equality. So, we wash of our hands of you and don't look back. We don't care about you either. Stop pretending we do.
i would date a feminist but i wouldn't date one that sounded as resentful as you, thats for sure
HAHAHAHAHA.
I think if your a man, an Asian women is the way to go. They treat you with respect and actually come right out and ask if you want a babies as a pickup line👍👍👍 . They live to have a family. The best friends and partners for life😊😂. A feminist to me is a man without a male member and to be treated as such. Their not wife options you don't want them raising your male kids😊. 90% of Asian society the women really want men for who they are and their roles. Philippines or other countries it's the only option. Just my view as with most of my friends the women are men here don't waste your resources and time or your young sons mental health.
date an female rights advocate yeah being one myself i could date them but dating a feminist that's a big no no for me. well at least in my local area the ones here are filled with man venom and spit it around every where i doubt I could even get one in a room for 5 mins without hostility or even date one haha :D
If you don't believe in my worth as a human beyond my lack of vagina or ability to make children or win bread for you to make sandwiches, why would I want to date you? Like, what exactly do you think you have to offer if you don't see me as a human being?
Oh look! A copy pasta of what I wrote! How clever.
There's a spectrum of "feminists." Any man worth his salt isn't going to expect a servile... servant, but on the other hand, guys don't want to end up with someone who's going to bail on them, take their kids, their house, their assets, and a sizeable chunk of their future income (all told, their self-worth) - literally "cashing out" the instant they start to get bored with the relationship.
I feel like that mentality is not restricted to feminists or even women.
Don't want kids.
I like to cook.
Like women with some personality.
Why not date a feminist? Sounds like a good time.
I don't care whether you care or not. The idea that all men who oppose feminism view women as inferior is ridiculous. I agree with @Eugene on his points.
@Eugene - yeah I know what you mean, UK is fucked.
I'm a fan of women, and spend a little too much time trying to shut down & educate misogynist posters.
I hope every anti-feminist gets what they deserve: a lonely life.
Kinda like the only people that comment on penis size posts are men, and the only (helpful) advice on dating/behavioral questions comes from women.
My eyes are open.
I wish some of these stubborn dudes would stop fighting with women for just long enough to listen to one woman speak.
Or maybe they should ask their mothers and sisters if they've ever felt uncomfortable or threatened because of a man, or underpaid, or treated unfairly for their lack of a penis.
Not that these kinds of dudes care what they're mothers, sisters, wives or gf's have been through.
They're too busy worrying that misandry is a thing, and that the extra incentives that men have enjoyed for 5,000 years may go away.
i think they are very very few jerks who treat women like that... dont over think this.. calm down..
I keep seeing dumb Takes like "Why I won't date feminists" and everything is misspelled.
hmm.. alright.. i dont get what i feminist is.. but why are women given the tag of a feminist... can't we b just women?
They aren't. A woman can believe in feminism or not. Men can also be feminists.
True^^
Just because you don't believe in feminism doesn't mean you don't see women as equals. Feminism does a lot of horrible things and people don't like when people associate with them. Not all of feminism is bad but all you hear is the bad it does so people prefer not to be around it.
As feminism is a movement dedicated to allowing women to be seen as equals, not believing in feminism would necessitate that you don't see women as equals.
I see women as equals but I don't want anything to do with feminism. Too many negatives associated with what they do.
I also don't like that feminism basically divides the genders and puts a barrier in between them. It would be better if they worked together to solve problems for men and for women and call themselves egallitarians.
And there are feminists who do so. Please do educate yourself further on the movement.
Most don't though. That's the problem.
Once again, please educate yourself.
Most feminists never prove their point. They just say educate yourself since they have nothing to prove people wrong.
Feminism isn't a single ideology. It's a collection. I can't speak for the entire movement any more than you can speak for every member of the country of your birth.
Well, I think the term feminist brings up the views of the Feminist Leadership in America, not feminism in its true sense. These women do NOT represent my views AT ALL!!
I wasn't even aware there was leadership. There are so many different ideologies that it's kind of pointless to lump them all together.
LMFAO if you think that's why a guy won't date a feminist. Stop sipping the kool-aid and actually listen to a guy's reasons for once (note: man-hating and deliberate attempts to harm men is the number one reason we won' date feminists).
And are all feminists violent? I think I would have heard about it if Emma Watson was picking men off like flies.
I was referring more to legislation, among other things.
But since you brought up physical violence, you may find it interesting that women are responsible for starting approximately 70% of domestic violence (they hit more often than men!) and that they injure their partners more frequently than men do (25% compared to 20%).
So while not all domestic abusers are feminists, I'd dare say some of those abusive women probably are.
Not necessarily.
Sure, for the sake of play, let's assume none of the women who hit men are feminists.
Where feminists then come into play in domestic abuse is their attempts to prevent men from receiving service from domestic abuse shelters.
Despite the stats I just gave you, only about 1% of domestic abuse shelters offer service to men. The ones that do will turn a man a way once a woman needs the facility. And feminists have been at the forefront of maintaining. The founder of domestic abuse shelters in Canada and the US, Erin Pizzey, has received death threats from feminists because she tried to offer service to men and for her research into women being equally capable of violence.
Honestly, I don't think that's right. I think that everyone who needs shelter from abuse should receive it. Does this make me any less of a feminist? No.
Ok, so clearly you are one of the "soft" feminists--kind of like a person born into a religion and doesn't ever really study any of its teachings, but still identify as a "christian" or "jew" or whatever.
Feminism (there are many ideologies within it) has done the world some good, and their are places in the world where healthy forms of it are needed. But if you look at the modern incarnation, study the tactics used and the ideologies pronounced, much of modern feminism is little more than a hate group that's has hijacked the good works of the past.
The big problem is that the average girl (like you) who simply wants equal pay for equal work and to feel valued are NOT the feminists men dislike--we dislike the hate-filled ones (and the thing is--the hate filled ones have the political power in the movement and are the ones most actively trying to harm men).
I'm also a soft atheist.
Well I think perhaps we're at more of an understanding now. To put my original statement more accurately, men don't hate feminists--the hate certain kinds who show through their actions that they use political power as a means to harm men. The typical girl who identifies as a feminist because she thinks she should have equal work opportunity and other freedoms is not hated--I think a healthy-minded man should actually seek such a women.
I think the important point is that there are different types of feminism, but the term has largely become associated with the hate-filled sorts (giving all feminists a bad name by association). Perhaps a new name would better serve women who aren't man-haters.
And I'm a hard atheist.
Most people are loath to abandon the term feminism because of its legacy. To do so (in my mind) does a disservice to the women who sacrificed a lot to help me get to where I am today.
You tell them... Like if they don't like a feminist girl. Its cool... We don't give/ care
Lol and here we have the typical man hating 'feminist'
What makes you think they care if you care? 😛
You must be fun at parties
Why mention it if they don't want me to hear about it?
If you don't care then why not just dismiss it and move on with your life
Just because we won't date a feminist doesn't mean that we only think of her as an object. For me, feminists, in general, aren't my type.
How do you know if you don't get to know them at all? That's like saying Hindus aren't your type. Hindus are still individuals (and so are feminists).
That's why I said "in general".
its called voicing a point of view. no one told you to care.
Why bother unless you want us to hear it?
if someone asks a question on gag like "would you date a feminist", "reasons to date a feminist", "how to date a feminist" etc are you implying our opinion should not be voiced there even with the asker asking?
No dear, I'm asking why you respond in the first place.
to voice our opinion. you asking me why i would voice my opinion would be like me asking why would you ask this question. you are voicing your point of you and i my own.
I don't mind dating a feminist, a lot of my female friends are feminists and they're still really great.
That being said, I'd never date you. You seem to have way too many issues.
Good question, since feminists usually belong only to the rich.. the ret of the guys, they won
t care, so why try to threten them with 'not dating?'
I want good human 😊
By the way www.girlsaskguys.com/.../q1555643-feminisim-is-it-bad
If you don't care, then why did you create this question? Apparently, you DO care.
If you didn't care why ask a question about it? Tell me exactly how someone saying they won't date a feminist affects your life.
It doesn't really, but why would they bother to tell me?
If you don't care why would it matter? I'm just saying posting a question about tends to show that you care.
You care because your vaginas are empty. That's the premise.
hmm I don't know, im not judging though.
Lol. Feminist logic.
They're just ranting...
nobody cares
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