Did I really go too far with fwb?

[Anonymous]

Was in a friends with benefits for a yr 1 1/2 and we just ended it cause i followed him and caught him with someone else. I know i may have done too much but he was doing too much too by telling me i couldnt mess with anyone else and that he would hurt me, texting me every other day, saying i was the only on, seeing each other 2 sometimes 3 times a wk, he sent me a song, and called me love. So yeah i fell for his lies and now my feelings are hurt. I had hoped he liked and cared about me but i see he didn't. But the reason i followed him was cause i noticed his distance and i asked about it and he told me i was still his baby lies... i fgured out who the girl was and told him and he said she was a friend nothing sexual so i followed and caught him and he saw me. I told him idc that he is messing with someone else just let me know so i can decide if i still want to mess with you. I had always told him i understood what this was and that to tell me when he didn't want me anymore. So he blew up my phone and texted me i texted him back and told me he was grown and he can do what the f he want and to find someone new.

[karennn]

I think it was unclear with the both of you what the term "friends with benefit" meant. In general, it means sex with no emotions. But clearly, feelings were involved. Maybe you invested more feelings in it than he has, seeing as to how fast he moved on to another girl. But he clearly wants to see where this goes with the new girl so you should just move on with your life.

[Asker]

How can you tell he wants to see where it goes with other girl? I didn't really mention her

[karennn]

He has been in your life for 1.5 years. Assuming you met him before he met her or started the friends with benefits before she came in the picture (?) He entertained her knowing fully well that he restricted you with other men. That's quite unfair but that's just my two cents.

[AzureGirl]

Well yeah, you both did. Fwb= no strings. He was leading you on, you were getting attached.

[Asker]

I want to see him and cuss him out and let him know how i really feel a yr. 1 1/2 doesn't he owe me that much for playing with my feelings?

[AzureGirl]

Not really, if you had feelings then you should have spoken up long ago. You're in an arrangement where feelings are not supposed to be involved. So by continuing it you pretty much set yourself up for this.

[Asker]

I told him from the get what type of person i was he knew i had never done anything like this or been in a relationship. I did a lot for him sexually anyway and he kicks me to the curb cause of 1 mistake when technically its his fault cause he created these feelings for me

[AzureGirl]

You still should have gotten out when feelings developed

[posted]

friends with benefits = penis + vagina and no feels.
I mean when you're in that kind of 'not-a-relationship' it shouldn't be to this degree of feels and rules. FWB= friends with benefits relationship = relationship.
Don't base a relationship on a friends with benefits in my opinion. He fucked you over and you got too attached here. Don't deal with him.

[Asker]

Wasn't basing a relationship on friends with benefits i knew what it was i just got mad cause when i told him to let me know when he didn't want me anymore he got mad or rather irritated. Then i let him know i knew he was messing with someone else he lies and says nothing sexual just a friend. I feel there is no reason to lie in a friends with benefits if someone ask a question about you sleeping with someone else when they put restrictions on you right?