What to do to get out of the “hookup only” zone?

[Anonymous]

I’ve been hooking up with this guy for 3 months in total. We were separated for 3 months and “broke up” once but now we’re back to our old pattern and we’ve known each other for almost a year.

I really like him but he told me he’s not pursuing a relationship. He’s chatty but he’s very close when it comes to personal topics and we don’t usually do sleepovers. It’s very difficult to meet him unless we’re arranging a hookup, even if we meet it’s not going to be a very long time. I’m trapped in the hookup zone.

I want to get him to text me more. Usually if I start a conversation he’s very responsive but he will usually end the conversation by not opening my last message the next morning, which is very confusing and annoying. He’s always checking my social media stories and likes every single post of mine (even if it’s a stupid/ugly picture of me). Also he’s introduced me to his best friends (we’re also connected on social media) and let me pick up the phone when he has a call from his mate.

I have a strong feeling that he does have some feelings for me but for some reason he is not making any move.

Any suggestions on how I can make a move to get him start to talk to me?

[StickStickity13]

ATTENTION WOMEN
Read this statement very carefully
If a man doesn't like you, he won't pursue a relationship. Men are MUCH more likely to have casual sex with women they aren't all that interested in. What you need to do is find a guy who's actually interested in you in the first place. You can NEVER make a guy interested, just like a guy can never make a woman interested.

[Asker]

I think he was interested in me in the first place but something happened and he seemed to be more distant since then. We have some misunderstandings but he never confronted with me. Also I wanted to end things before I went back to my home country but he refused it, he said he still wanted to see me when I come back and he won’t see other girls. It seems weird to me, if it’s just casual sex, it doesn’t have to be me isn’t it?

[StickStickity13]

He would make it known if he likes you.

[Anonymous]

Depends what more you want. If you're aiming for exclusive monogamy, not gonna lie that might well be difficult. But getting him to open up more, contact you more, spend more time and do more things with you is probably quite achievable. Try finding opportunities to demonstrate that he can trust you, maybe?

[Asker]

I totally agree with you but I don’t know what to do. How can I get him to open up and contact me more? Shall I just text him whenever I think of a question? Its just I don’t want to seem clingy or desperate

[Opinion Owner]

Remember Daenerys' move at the beginning of Game of Thrones with Khal Drogo? I don't know what your style in the sack currently is, but maybe ask him to clear some extra diary space for your next hookup, so you won't be as rushed. That way you can both be more relaxed, seductive and intimate, try more things and make more conversation. That might get your foot in the door, so to speak.

[anniisa]

He doesn't like you (in the way you want him to). If he liked you he wouldnhave made to very clear.

I'm not trying to be harsh but I want you to understand that you're his girl on the side. As soon as someone better comes in his life he's going to cut all contact from you.

[anniisa]

Would have made it very clear*

[CrazyyChick]

Sorry sweetheart when you are going in there, there is no coming back

[boggboss]

There is nothing you can do as he may not be ready also how sure are you that he wants to go further with u

[Asker]

Like half half, it’s very complicated between us. I wanted to end things before I went back to my home country for the summer but he refused to do that. Also I think there were some misunderstandings going on in his mind but he never asked. Deep down I feel he cares about me to some extent but he never talked about these things straightforwardly. He’s been through a very bad breakup with his ex for 4 years, which is the major reason why he’s not pursuing a relationship.

[boggboss]

Well that's it then he is not ready

[reptocarl]

Nope he’s only with you because you spread your legs

[stephk4]

Mabye he is afraid that evreything with change or that ull change his mind about him but never the less u need to confront him in person and get answers and if he refuses answer its time to cut him out

[synonymous773]

You get dick, that's about it. Don't expect no ring

[Guanfei]

He just want to fuck you and that's it. So, to get out of it, you can leave him for ood.

[BirdFly]

Just say "OUT OUT OUT" with loud voice.

[disgustingweebtrash]

Hahahaha

[amirsuhail]

No dont do it again