What makes you want to date a girl?

[Anonymous]

As opposed to just wanting to fuck her? What qualities does she possess that make her stand out from other women? Physical attraction is obvious, but what would make you genuinely want to get to know a girl?

[MrOracle]

First, there has to be mutual attraction - not only do I have to find her attractive, but she has to find me attractive too (and I am far from great looking). She has to want ME - not just my house or my wallet or my future prospects.

She needs to be reasonable and realistic about life - I've met a lot of women over the years who have little or nothing themselves, often are deep in debt, and they think that dating should mean traveling and fancy vacations, or her quitting her job to hang out with her friends and shop while a maid, nanny, and gardener take care of everything else at home.

Then, we have to be "long-term relationship compatible" - similar morals, values, life goals, etc.

That's hard to find in another person, but amazing when you do.

[dr1fter]

I can't believe Glenn Quagmire, of all peoplez is getting more upvotes than me🙄
Jk😂
That's a really well written perspective :)

[Sociopathvictim]

this is an unrealistic expectation ;D im sorry but girls although high achievers in school leavers exams, go downhill soon after. Between the ages of 20-30 they have mental illness (depression, personality disorders, etc) and they are happier when they are with their girlfriends. I do agree, there may be this odd girl who is different and thats the girl you marry.

[dr1fter]

First, I absolutely can't have meaningless sex. It just doesn't appeal to me if there's no emotional bond🤷‍♂️

As for what would make me genuinely want to get to know a girl? I'd say a compatible personality and shared interests. I find women to be attractive if they share my sense of humor, are down-to-earth, kind, generous, open minded, determined, feminine, independent, adventurous, and whatever other traits I value in a person.

In other words, I'm attracted to women who are subjectively physically appealing and possess a compatible personality. Personality is the most important part of a woman's character in a meaningful relationship.

[wini1234]

Okay some of these opinions are so hilarious i mean the fact that a guy literally wrote the fact that he wants to date a woman because a guy can't impregnate a child on his own is the true indication how we are running out of boys who genuinely respect woman and live them for their beautiful soul. Let me tell u what boys these days want... They want a insecure woman who is dependent on them.. They like the fact that their girl is dependent on them, they dont like it when girls are independent and mature... its a fact guys... Its not that m a anti - man girl or i genuinely hate boys... I dont hate boys... But this is a fact thqt boys like insecure girls

[Sociopathvictim]

haha wow look at this one, you're a joker seriously. You clearly have the wrong perception.
We dont want a dependant girl, we are not your bank account. We do want a girl who can stand on her own two feet and has self-respect for herself. We hate insecure girls, they constantly moan and worry and its depressing. Most insecure girls are depressed, do you know how it feels to be around a depressed person? I'll tell you, they make the guy feel bad, they have mood swings hot and cold, you dont know if they are unhappy because you're around them or some other reason. We want a happy girl who treats dates like a fun experience. If you have this wrong perception of guys, it will carry in your personality around them.

[wini1234]

The fact that m independent and single should tell u enough. Every relationship that i observe has insecure girl in it. I mean the way they make fuss on small things is attractive to boys because they think its cute.

[Sociopathvictim]

lol no darling, we have to put up with this shit. I've met a lot of girls and i realise perfection doesn't exist so i compromise, the more attractive a girl is the lesser personality they have. Girls are submissive and so they become insecure because they like guys pushing them around and hurting them and the feeling of dependancy builds up. When they break up, the next guy is dealing with an absolute mess. This is the dating pool. This is how girls choose to be, if a girl didn't put up with shit and guys didn't put up with shit, everyone would be single.

[wini1234]

Hahaha when u say it like that i think i will be single for the rest of my life. So i dated this guy couple of months back and we genuinely liked each other but after some time he backed out and didn't text or call and when i asked him why he did that he said and i quote "you are too independent ".

[Sociopathvictim]

He clearly didn’t like you to come up with something like that and say it in that way. First of all, it shows he’s clingy and has no life of his own (his own friends, his own hobbies) his own achievements and you’re better than he is. If he has any respect for you he’d be happy that you’re in control of your life, he maybe didn’t trust you and that’s his problem. To put into a small sentence means he doesn’t actually make any effort. These are the thing I pick up from just a small sentence. True or false?

[wini1234]

True

[wini1234]

But see he is not the only one...

[Sociopathvictim]

There are many like him but there are many who aren’t. You’ll find one.

[wini1234]

I hope so but its just so difficult i have been on many dates but none of them seem to work out

[Sociopathvictim]

This may sound lame to you, but if you develop friendship initially before dating it filters out the ballbags. Initial rejection is also a factor in filtering out the ballbags. If you're interested in him, you'll naturally like him and its then up to you to let him know in a gentlewomanly way (btw these complex hints are also designed to filter out the ballbags). The ones who stick around and work out your interest are high value. I have currently succeeded in this way with a 24 yr old girl, she demonstrated that she is not easy to get (breathes)

[wini1234]

Wow this is a great idea

[LuvAsh]

Most people on here say what they want but don't go after that type of girl OR don't appreciate her when they get her. Not tryna make anyone mad, just stating what I see🤷

[Anonymous]

I’m not a casual sex type of guy, and I’ve never “just fucked” anyone. There must be more.

A woman who is smart is probably number one. An education is one thing, but almost anyone can get through school if they try hard enough. I’m talking about a thirst for knowledge, the willingness and ability to challenge me when she disagrees with me, quick humor, an avoidance of the occult and pseudoscience (tarot and astrology, for example), someone who is entertained by much more than celebrity gossip and reality television, who doesn’t treat me like an outcast if I use vocabulary above the 5th grade level, who knows the difference between fact and opinion, and who can be stimulating from conversation alone.

It’s crucial that a woman has a passion of some sort. If she’s totally into something and is so excited by it and rewarded by doing it, it shows me she has an inner life and doesn’t define herself by her friends or by her man. She is her own person and can find sufficient company in herself.

A thirst for adventure. Travel. Being outdoors. Trying new cuisine. Trying a new sport. Going to see live music and art. She knows that experiences are worth much more than possessions.

Those would definitely set her apart.

[virginbish]

I hope there are not guys that have never "just fucked" a girl as well!

[Opinion Owner]

@virginbish I certainly didn’t need to wait until marriage, but I did need to like her well enough to see a potential future with her.

[zombiejagër]

Gona be honest here and go on a limb right. I COULD NOT CARE for physical attraction i also have no urge for sex (kinda got me in the situation where i got a kid and im not aloud to see him)

What makes me want to daye a girl? Im lonely as FUUCCKK. <-- see that, thats all. Well to explain i have no family, i left them when i was 19 and moved across the world away so i have legit noone. Friends are great but u can't hold them close when ur down, or just tickle them or hug them and watch movies, u can't take them on cute as fuck dates just to see them smile, u can't walk around the house in their underwear judt to make them laugh and u sure as hell can't wait to finish work just to go see them and spend time with them. (I ride a motorbike so 80% of my mates are bikers... and that type of stuff just doesmt swing well ya no?)

And why would i want to get to know her? Well first off why does she like me? Whats her back story? Why the hell would she even possibly be interested in a failed guy with a fucked up history, no memory of 2017, slightly insane (i got to therapy tho so im fine...) and who struggles with sarcasum (im far to honest so yea i dont get it)

Yes i know its a long reply but thats my reason, i just hope i find a girl someday, everything else is a bonus. Good looks? Bonus, rides a bike? Omg bonus, likes video games, fuckin yea bonus, likes drinking? 100% bonus but i honestly couldnt care aslomg as i had a girl to call mine

[zombiejagër]

Oh and we gota be like besties... bffl like obvs type stuff

[virginbish]

This was so incredibly cute, I really hope she finds you soon! You seem to really want to smother her with affection, and that gal would be very lucky

[zombiejagër]

Ah probs no chance of it happening any time soon cause i can't even approach girls but ohwells someday it will happen and i look forward to that day 😂

[Knighted2170]

I did a MyTake on some of traits I look for. You can look them over with this link.
14 Traits Men Find Attractive In Women ↗
If I were to really sum everything up into some simple words. She is just a cool person who brings some value into my life. There is something about her that she can bring to make me a better person.
That's really what I'm looking for.

As for the mindless sex. I just did a MyTake on that today.
How does sex feel for the opposite sex? How can we raise the sexual bar for our partner? ↗
If there isn't any real connection, it's nothing more than satisfying an animalistic urge. That's not appealing, I'm still left feeling unsatisfied. I need to have that connection.

[rjroy3]

As far as non physical traits: in no particular order

1. She loves men and appreciates them
2. Genuine individual
3. Caring
4. Kind
5. Playful
6. A loyal friend
7. Adventurous
8. Can take criticism without getting overly defensive. Like if I do my absolute best to provide constructive criticism, while keeping her feelings in mind she is capable of taking that.
9. Is accepting of the things I like to do. It's fine if she lightly teases me, but it needs to be in good heart.
10. Has real friendships that are longstanding. Having a real life long best friend is a huge bonus, because that's rare to see for girls. Granted this isn't a requirement, just a huge bonus that I personally respect.

But the core list for me is:

1. Kind
2. Caring
3. Genuine
4. Playful/Adventurous
5. Kinky - when I say that I mean more enthusiastic and open to experimentation. Not like she needs to be into bondage or anything lol.

[FinalVow]

actually I wanted to date a girl before even realizing what she looked like. I have a weird problem in that I can't actually look at someone that way so I could stare at them all damn day and not even realize if they were attractive or not. For me when I get to know there personality I either want to date them or I want to drop them off a building. after that I can see them physically and I will actually feel an emotion based on there looks. I also have no interest in making love to the woman I am romantically interested in I am happy just being with her. If that comes in the future then so be it. I am just letting things go as they are what happens, happens. I know myself well enough to know that I will stop before making love even if my body wants it so long as it feels wrong. when it feels right then I will

[virginbish]

This is just incredible!

[FinalVow]

@virginbish incredibly rare I suppose. :)

[virginbish]

Your response was indeed xD

[FinalVow]

@virginbish it is true. My brain is still replaying the events of yesterday on repeat. we spent 4 hours just sitting together hugging. The last half hour we started kissing. though time seemed to elongate because it felt like hours passed. there was a lot of talking during the first 3 hours though. my brain was thoroughly happy with the exercise it got.

[virginbish]

Aweee :)
I love it when my mind gets exercised and feels like it's doing happy jumping jacks xD it's very rare to find someone who offers your mind such happiness indeed ahah

[FinalVow]

@virginbish She is the girl that is wife material :). It was really interesting when I look back on the past events leading up to now. I had pretty much realized I was going to be single forever and I stopped looking. I came back home from a different state and got a job and boom she appeared. spent a while talking to her and getting to know her asked her out and she didn't say yes or no she said "this is crazy I am so much older than you" (11 is not that much) So we became friends sort of. I had realized that I might have a chance so I kept that in my mind. She kept saying how she wasn't right for me and this and that and then apparently her heart decided to take over because we started getting closer. nothing fancy just physical contact. Then she had a war with herself and I guess her heart won because she started hugging me and then yesterday she started kissing me.

[virginbish]

Aweeeeee 💕💕💕 and no, 11 years in some cultures is still considered okay (not conventional) but can definitely work. And whos to judge anyway? If you two are happy, that's all that matters ;)

[WildNekoWolf]

Honestly, her personality is a great factor. I prefer smart girls and girls that don't have a big ego. I love nice girls and girls that are strong enough to deal with bullies and other dickwads if I'm not there. But a question I ask myself is, how trustworthy will they be? I like girls that I can trust a lot. I also like girls that prefer to stay inside and drink cocoa[just a random choice] while we watch a movie on the couch. Someone that doesn't dress to impress me, but instead does the opposite; a girl that dresses in clothes she finds comfortable.

[virginbish]

Are u really 15? U have quality expectations for someone your age, that many people in their 20's don't even have! Don't ever ever change!

[WildNekoWolf]

I think I've actually found some girls like this too.

[WildNekoWolf]

@virginbish ; Why should I not change?

[virginbish]

Because you are quite intelligent and seem to already know what a good partner is all about. For someone so young, you really impressed me :) and I hope you continue to use your noodle as you age and don't succumb to peer pressure when the guys/girls are all wild... I don't see any benefits to their actions and I hope you realize that as you age as well

[WildNekoWolf]

@virginbish ; Well, I don't succumb to peer pressure easily. And the reason I want to date a girl like that is simple, all those traits are some I have. Course, I know not everyone will be like that.

[virginbish]

Well u have the type of personality that will easily be able to form a long lasting bond with someone, when given the chance :)
And it's good that you don't succumb to peer pressure easily, I didn't either when I was younger, and altho I was bullied for that lol, it was sooooo worth it

[WildNekoWolf]

I'm never bullied. But to be fair, I have the build of a football player and I always look angry.

[virginbish]

😂😂😂😂😂 that would help it for sure ahahah
I was quite petite and friendly, so I guess I was seen as the optimal target for all the raging hormones and insecurities the other teens were dealing with

[WildNekoWolf]

I'm friendly, but I don't look friendly.

[WildNekoWolf]

I know multiple people that are similar to the type of girls I like.

[WildNekoWolf]

@virginbish ; I know four girls that are the type of girl I like.

[virginbish]

Really? That's quite good tbh! Growing up that wasn't the case for me ahah, everyone always seemed to have the same personality 😂😂

[WildNekoWolf]

Yeah. And they're all my friends except for one😊.

[virginbish]

Hehe :)

[Anonymous]

If a girl is interested and dedicated to making making the world better, I wanna date her. You know, like helping our civilization, sending out a message to the world that is both positive and logical.

I've always dreamed of making the world better in ways only a mad scientist would waste his time on. I dream of a world without divisions in society. Which also makes me feel like an idiot because what would a 22 year old sitting at home with no idea HOW to make his dream come true in this day and age do? If I could just find one girl who shares this crazy mission of mine, I'd be ready to spend eternity with her in a heartbeat.

[Anon-ymous1]

This.
www.humourdemecs.com/.../Savannah-Montano-5.jpg

And everything as close to it as possible.
"Physical attraction is obvious." Yeah... it's the first, most important thing. Personality in all its various complexities and nuances, while important, are secondary. If someone of the opposite sex doesn't pass the attraction litmus test, you won't stay interested in them.

[ravenengr]

Can hold an intelligent conversation and isn't affraid to challenge my opinions or thoughts. Is independent, comfortable in her own skin and knows who she is and what she wants. Good sense of humor, knows when and how to be proper and formal, and knows when/how to be naughty

[MecheD]

The thing that sets a woman up to be “wifey material “ is the way she carries herself for one... also the reputations she has if she only gives her self to a few rather than many. Also if her concern is truly about your well being rather than what she stands to lose if you weren’t there to provide.

[rpgeek]

Since your talking about the difference between just wanting sex to wanting to date. For me it seems like some women think that the long legged, blonde haired, busty women is the ideal which if i just wanted a one night stand would be ok but for me cute and nice is so much better. A good person who i can get along with, joke with, talk to, and care for is the person who i want to be with.

[iskg679]

My list is too long to describe.

I'm Tired of Society and Women's Preconceived Notions of What Masculinity is ↗

My mytake sums it all up.

[Kaneki05]

Well i just want someone close to me who i can always depend on been there for me and also her been like me and that's what every other guy looks for someone who is most like them so you can both understand and like/love each other. Tbh i never understand realtionships when there both diffrent from each other i think that would just be a mess been with someone nothing like yourself.

[OnitheWanderer]

If a girl intrigues me.. Surely i will want to know basically everything about her (creepy vibe) hahaha... but seriously, to make me be intrigued, the girl must have something unique that appeals to me (it doesn't matter her looks) but mostly her character or personality or humor.

[winterfox10]

For me it's elegance, intellect, and charm. I'm an aesthete, so I essentially demand that my partners have taste and refinement, even if it's not taste I would necessarily agree with, she needs to have purpose in doing things the way she does. Intellect, because who doesn't love a good conversation? Charm, because I like having fun. If you have those 3 qualities, I'll consider you potential dating material.

[Loozeroo]

A girl who is at a similar wavelength to me in terms of ambition, intelligence, understands my sense of humour and confident with herself... Basically someone I can easily speak to and be myself around :)

[BHooper]

Girls that are family orientated but also have a great sense of humour. Kindness. Doing little things like saying please and thank you can go along way and is extremely attractive. As well as just helping other's out of kindness and being a loving person.

[H4mz4wy]

There isn't one specific answer to this question because every man wants to date for different reasons. Yes, there are some reasons that all men have, like we want a woman who would simply make us stop wanting to look or want any other one. The one who would make all the shit goes away when we are having a bad day and most importantly one who is loyal.
Try answering the question " what makes you want to date a man?" And you will find many similar answers to those you will get from your answer.

[Anonymous]

Their mind, personality and similarity of interests. The only time I've come close to love was where something in the way they wrote/spoke touched something fundamental in me. Not entirely sure why that happened but it did. Of course, physical features do play a part in it as well.

[BraveHeart97]

That she actually cares. The women I’ve dated never seemed to care about my dreams or ambitions. They usually treat me as I’m just another possible gateway for them to have a luxurious life like they see on Instagram. Definitely was a degrading experience.