When you’ve had a long streak of bad dating experiences, should you take a break or keep trying to meet people? Why?

Question

lumos · Accepted Answer

You should probably take a break and try to figure out why you keep dating bad people (I’m assuming it’s them being bad that makes the experience bad). I have a friend who has literally no filtering process, like she’s ready to give basically anyone a shot as long as they so much as glance her way. This has led to her dating men with mental health problems (nothing wrong with that per se, but they were clearly not ready for a serious relationship), guys who don’t respect her and guys in general who are not looking for something serious/long term. And then she ends up heartbroken when the image she had of the dude comes crashing down, when in reality there were signs of him not being right for her very early on. She should focus on filtering, as well as establishing what it really is that she wants out of a relationship. And I would give the same advice to anyone who’s struggling to find ”good people”. Good people are everywhere and not even that hard to find. The problem usually lies within the one looking.

Cynicaldreamer · Accepted Answer

Take a break. Why keep trying to date when your self esteem and confidence is low? It will only make you feel worse. Or out of desperation you might settle or sleep with the first person that shows you any attention, even if they're not the right person.

There's nothing wrong with taking a break and accessing yourself, what you need/want in a relationship, and looking at your past dating fiascos and saying, "okay, I seen to always go for this type of person; maybe I should avoid that type of person..."

Plus taking a break will let you learn to love yourself and your own company and not rely on a partner to make you happy all the time.

coachTanthony · Accepted Answer

It is always good to take a break. Try and get some feedback on what happened in these bad relationships. Are you ignoring red flags in the beginning? Are you always choosing a certain type of person? Asking yourself these questions may be the key to finding the right person next time. Self awareness is key!

MrOracle · Accepted Answer

It's probably a good idea. Take some time to work on yourself, rebuild your self-esteem and self-worth and just re-center yourself spiritually.

Pinay_ako · Answer

Yes. Just don't force love to happen. Enjoy your single life. If you meet someone, get to know them but don't get involved in the dating scene right away if things don't feel right on the get go.

Apope16 · Answer

I like to meet people like its groundhog day. Just have fun. Treat the date as fun rather than your next husband or wife.

Desconhecida · Answer

If someone is having a "long streak of bad dates ", it's time to choose quality over quantity for a change..

lightbulb27 · Answer

depends what you mean here, there are diff things.
if you keep picking jearks off old, then keep trying and in diff ways.
But if you see a pattern in relationship, time to stop, heal up and assess what is going on. Someboday is invovled here... who is it... who is picking, choosing, saying yes... hummm... lm think... person in the mirror right? yep... actually... look deeper... it is the sub conscious of the person in the mirror.
So maybe that sub conscious needs some work to cleanup some past messes, so the attraction is better. Do some reflection on what you are picking vs what is good for you. We all... most of us... have this problem, isn't a you thing, but a human thing.
reality to is, there's a lot of junk out there, that's so frustrating. It's like going out for an amazing buffet to find out it is all stuff from a can, cheap, low quality, disposable, bland, blech! I don't know who is generating quality people. They are out there, men are trying, but they are being chewed up as well. It's tough out there...

McKellar · Answer

I just quit. I got tired of all the B. S. I was getting from women. Every girl I have met & gotten involved with always ends the same way. Her & I date for a bit, some how the relationship hits something on the road which caused the relationship to spiral out of control & BAM!! She breaks it off from me, doesn't provide any explanations as to why ( If she did, it's a lame-ass excuse. That's all I have to say ) and I know for a fact the next girl I meet & desires a relationship with me,... the results are going to be the exact same damn thing. So I just shake my head & think "What's the point anymore?"

Factshurt90 · Answer

Stop trying to meet people!!! Go about your normal activities and find someone naturally. Keep an eye out and available, but don't intentionally look. If you like to bowl, go bowling. If you like to dance, go dancing. If you like art. Join an art socials group. Live your life, but be seen. You'll meet someone naturally.

slatyb · Answer

Depends on the sort of bad experiences you had. I did a lot of online dating and once over several months I had about seventeen first dates and no second dates. My main lesson was "If she lied about her appearance by posting an old photo, don't waste any more time on her."

taleswapper · Answer

I think what you SHOULD do is failure analysis. What are you doing wrong that you keep ending up with bad dating experiences? Does your selection criteria need adjusting? Or your dating style? Are your expectations unreasonable?

Until you find the problem, you're likely to keep having the same outcomes. YOU are what all these dates have in common.

Anonymous · Answer

It depends entirely on whether or not that bad streak was an issue with you or an issue with your partners, but it never hurts to remain single for a little while to reconnect with yourself.

Relationships can be stressful enough, even a good one. Jumping right back on the wagon after falling off a few times only sounds like a bad plan.

Figure out what made the relationships so bad before deciding to go out and meet new fellas.

NineBreaker · Answer

I've been there. I find that it's a good idea to take a break in that situation. It gives you the opportunity to develop some clarity.

I'm all for trying and not giving up, but a break every now and then can be therapeutic.

AustinMan · Answer

I'd suggest finding a good therapist and investing in a few sessions to figure out why you chose the wrong men and how to change you selection process to find the right ones.

Finchie40 · Answer

Still date , just cuz u go on a date doesn't mean you have to rush anything , just take things slow stay on a friend level , be upfront about it , if that person likes you they will understand

Alice2398 · Answer

That's what I've been doing and I think it's the best decision I've made for a long time. I feel so free to be myself and have more time to focus on myself

markscott · Answer

Take a break and assess what has been happening and why.

Maguel · Answer

Take a break if you feel exhausted by it. Otherwise keep it up. You're only young once and getting on dates is easier then.

JojoSiwasBiggestFan · Answer

Take a break. Self reflect. Why did the relationship end? Was it your fault or theirs? What were you flaws? What were theirs? This can help you choose a better partner next time.

SunnyCaliGirl · Answer

I'd take at break and it's actually what Im doing at the moment with dating, I did not experience bad date, but I realized after my first ever beak up I needed to take a break for my own self

Blueeyes81 · Answer

Take some time to analyze the situation. Figure out where its going wrong. Is it on your end and you need to work and improve aspects of yourself. Is it the type you are attracted to. Break it all down and regroup and try again in the future.

zagor · Answer

I'm seriously thinking of giving up on the whole thing and just letting internet porn take care of my physical needs. Just not meeting anyone anymore.

And it doesn't help working in a field that is 85% male.

Anonymous · Answer

Take a break. To get to know yourself first, what's good for you and what's not, what you want, who you are as an individual, what do you expect from a relationship, what the role of a SO in your life is...

EmmaMary · Answer

I would take a break and completely re-evaluate things.

MannMitAntworten · Answer

Personally I took a break. Some would argue I am still on it. Regardless whether or not that is true as I am as happy as it gets.

winterfox10 · Answer

I'm on a horrible streak, but I haven't given up yet. I think there comes a point where you just have to accept that dating blows, and that the only way through a crappy situation is to keep moving.

dy8alexUk · Answer

Haven't had a date in 10 years have had some fun with women from time to time around at mine. most have been married. but I have never taken any one out.

valualty · Answer

Things don't just happen in our lives by coincidence. We contribute to it subconsciously. You can never figure out others before you figure out yourself to begin with...

intjgamer · Answer

Maybe take a break and think about the type of people you are choosing. Or even take a look at yourself and determine whether it is actually you who is changing the other and making the experiences bad.

TacosRAwesome · Answer

Take a break and reflect on why you're getting bed experiences.

Sanchez_Rodrigez · Answer

Take a break its very important because you will fix time for yourself, then you can go ahead more stronger.

fulloflife · Answer

Keep trying... it could be bad luck. Or maybe take a look at yourself in the mirror. Maybe do even both.

Mia_pearl · Answer

Take a break. Learn to make better judgement in character when choosing a partner, then you can date.

Giggletr0n · Answer

Take a break, you obviously aren't ready for it or you just have shitty luck that needs a breather

pleasestopthis · Answer

Take some time to heal and think about yourself, your actions, your past decisions.

Anonymous · Answer

I would take a break to see if I was doing something wrong and reevaluate my approach. Because sometimes taking a fresh perspective can help make a difference.

Dsg1193 · Answer

I’d say take a break to get yourself in the right mindset to date again when you’re ready.

Dankster96 · Answer

Stop and reevaluate what's going awry.

musicloverr8 · Answer

Take a break but don't isolate yourself.

Doodabeat · Answer

You should stay friends

bhavy24 · Answer

I have given up on dating now

LuWe22 · Answer

Good idea to take a break and focus on yourself

Slim57 · Answer

Of course why keep putting yourself through that

baby19362142 · Answer

Take a break and find out the reason

Jane_anne · Answer

Take a break

Daniel3035 · Answer

Break

brittslitt · Answer

Drop out 🤣

DECENTSCOTTISHLAD999 · Answer

Take a break

When you’ve had a long streak of bad dating experiences, should you take a break or keep trying to meet people? Why?

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