If a guy ghosts me after a second date, does that mean I’m ugly?

[Anonymous]

I’m a very kind, quite confident, chatty, friendly girl and the dates seemed to go well. The only warning I got was that he didn’t really make much effort especially with replying.

he didn’t text me after our last date. I texted him a week later to see if he still wants to talk but he ignored that, what’s wrong with me?

[AnaxGrypos]

It could be things didn't click or he lost intrest. I despise ghosting if your adult enough to date then you should be able to communicate that its not gonna work out.

You said the date went well can you into detail?

You also said you texted him, had it been a constant stream of texts or a few?

What did you talk about before the date and how often?

[Asker]

He was always bad at replying before the date, he never really made an effort with texting. I asked him loads of questions but all he asked me was ‘how are you?’ And then talked about himself. I had to set up the dates as well. And he was late. the date was long and we talked for hours about loads of different topics, it flowed and felt instantly comfortable. He didn’t ask me many questions in the date though and often talked in monologues? He walked in front of me a lot. But then he ignored my text after the date

[AnaxGrypos]

Was thier a kiss at the end , or any sexual tension , I apologize if the question is uncomfortable

[Asker]

No it felt quite platonic , like I flirted with him occasionally but he didn’t flirt back or touch me or try and build any sexual tension. I don’t know if it was because of covid restrictions everything feels weird. But to be ghosted hurts me

[AnaxGrypos]

I understand your pain. We will get through it.

With the information I have currently sounds like he wasn't to intrested to begin with. One sided relationship suck in my opinion, if your the one always checking in and asking questions or making plans , that person is not contributing as much as you. Should be around 50/50 not everyday but close. You should maybe ask yourself if that's something you want or if your better off. It's awesome that your had a good date , but I also think dates require some sexual tension and flirting this creates a strong spark and desire to keep seeing one another.

As for now stop texting him and put him on the back burner. If there is something there especially if you've been the main communicator he will be like whats going on and reach out , if he doesn't cut the loss and move on to someone who is willing to put as much of an effort as you.

If you have my questions or need more advise let me know.

[Asker]

But why would he agree to dates and have kept talking to me for months before we met only to ghost me? He was always apologetic for slow replies before we met but now we have met I found this disrespectful. Why would he have faked interest with me?

[AnaxGrypos]

Was this your first date? Could he be busy? Did you both know what each other looked like before you met?

It's hard to say by looking in from the outside , and I'll help try to make sense of what may have happened.

[Asker]

it was our third date. We met on a dating site. He always says he’s busy but sure that’s an excuse.

[AnaxGrypos]

Well of its your 3rd date im sure you can count looks out.

Why are you sure that is an excuse?
Have you asked him what is going on?

[Asker]

I texted him asking if he doesn’t want to see me anymore. He ignored it.

[AnaxGrypos]

That sucks , honestly do you wanna be with someone who would do that? Sounds like things didn't click but he may have tried , could be busy. The way he did things is wrong. Try and move past it you are probably better off.

[Kru2020]

He may have just wanted a hookup and if you didn't go through with it he could have lost interest or even if you did do it he could have also lost interest. Just forget about the guy and move on.

[imanf7]

It's not necessary about your looks. you might enjoy a date and think it's a great but the other doesn't. Also many people still go on dates when they actually like someone else. so if he shows no interest , just cut him out and find someone else. don't lose your time , only choose guys who make efforts and appreciate you

[Zarapeachy]

I didn’t read everything, only the question but why you think ugly as the first response? I mean it can also be you’re not his type

[MannMitAntworten]

Ugly? Not necessarily. Frankly there could be a a mountain of different reasons. It is not a bad thing. It just filters out those who wouldn’t work for you anyhow.

[LEADFOOTboi]

uh... no? it may mean y'all may not be compatible... if you was ugly... u wouldn't have got a second date I GAURONTEEEE

[TurkıshGladyator]

Would you enjoy to chatting