Can I date a my friend's fling?

My roommate, and now good friend, was involved in a fling last summer for a good 2 or 3 months. I met both her and him after they had ended it, he liked her, but she did not have feelings for him. They are still friends. That was about a year ago and she is now in a serious relationship with another man (they are moving in together this fall). My other friend, the man she had a fling with, is interested in me. There has always been some tension between us, I think that he is a great guy, and I'd love to go on a date with him but not if it will jeopardize my friendship with her. Can I date him? How do I approach the situation with her? Or should I just leave this one alone, because I don't want to disrespect her, she is a very dear friend of mine.


Most Helpful Girl

  • Do not listen to the girl who called you a bitch, she's being unreasonable.

    Actually I think you should date him, because you like him and your friend didn't have feelings for him and now is with another man.

    Of course, you need to ask her if she's okay with it. Chicks before d***s, always.

    I firmly believe that no girl should ever mess around with her best friends' ex, BUT if she had no real feelings for him, and now is happy with someone else, why not?

    Do ask her, though. That's a priority.

    • No, I'm not being unreasonable! If you actually agree with this bullsh*t, then you'd probably loose a good friend over your selfish desires too! True friends do not pursue guys that their friends have dated. Point blank. It doesn't matter if she's okay with it, deep down if you guys actually grow a strong relationship, do you really think she's gonna like seeing it? What if she ends up having relationship problems and sees him appearing to treat you well? It's gonna make her feel like sh*t.

    • but I guess your selfish stupid bitchy ass didn't think about that huh?

    • My now ex-boyfriend cheated on my with my best friend, DO NOT even think for a second that I don't understand that sh*t. But I can give an objective opinion, and if her friend doesn't care about the two of them going out, WHY SHOULD YOU? And stop calling everybody a bitch, it just lessens your credibility.

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  • Well I know there is that rule that once dated by a friend no one else gets a look in, BUT your friend is now in a relationship and is planning to move in with this guy.AND she broke up with the other guy because she didn't have feelings for him any more.

    While I would say that some ex's are a no no, like for instance if they had been together 2 years, then that probably would be a great thing to go into. BUT remember, no one owns anyone and its easy to miss out on the ones that you want, because little things get in the way.

    Speak to your friend and see how she feels about it, but remember, she does not own this guy, and she does not actually have the right to tell you who you see and who you don't..and just because she has had a 'fling' with him, doesn't make her any more entitled.

  • Yes I think this guy is fair game

  • No you stupid bitch. That would be so selfish and tacky! What the hell is wrong with you? It's girls like you that give us other girls a bad name. Because you guys are so damn selfish an uncaring about others' feelings that you'll take sloppy seconds if it means getting what you want. A true friend wouldn't even consider that.

    Date him so she can loose a sh*tty friend.