"Nice Guys" are narcissistic assholes pretending to be nice but not actually do.
If Liberals, they're Male Feminists/Soy Boys and tend to be the verbally abusive type (Joss Whedon, JJ Abrams). If Conservatives, they're (actual) Incels and Red Pilled (Elliot Roger). Both sides are generally considered beta males, though. Doesn't matter if they're soy-filled or red-pilled. Beta males are beta males because they completely lack self-respect (but they're still male and still have sexual male urges and needs). So they try to use sneakiness as a tactic to get girls to substitute for self-esteem and assertiveness.
I was never a Nice Guy, but in my early 20s, I came close. The difference between a "Nice Guy" and a lonely shy guy who just wants love is intent. "Nice Guys" think being nice is an unofficial contract with a woman, with niceness being the currency to exchange for sex. Genuine lonely guys who happen to be nice aren't entitled or expecting anything from women (other than basic human respect and decency). They also want more than just sex and won't act demanding and abusive once they actually get a woman's attention.
I've known both types in my twenties, and can tell you the way to avoid being a Nice Guy is to be honest to women, and always have respect for yourself. "Nice Guys" are neither honest, or have respect; for other people or themselves.
u I'll give it a read!
There's no point in using ”...” when talking about nice guys/gals, because the term is already used in a pejorative way.
Those who pretend to be nice use their niceness in a transactional way. It's a fake niceness they would like to trade in for a service. They want sex/attention/admiration in exchange for something apparently nice. They also tend to be passive-aggressive and get mad when you refuse them. A lot of stalkers and creeps believe they are nice guys.
As for someone who is genuinely nice, they don't ask anything in return for being like that. They will help you if you need it, they'll step back if you'll want to and they will never use whatever they did nice for you against you.
I think real character is private and anonymous meaning - your bed is neat and tidy and your job performance is good even if your not being acknowledged when you work and nobody sees your beautiful room. A nice person who is nice for money or social reasons is more of a social dependent and not a social constant.
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I think strength and power in some respect. A sheep is not impressive being nice, and its gentleness might be prompted by fear and submission. A gentle lion is much rarer.
It is like a servant is supposed to be kind. A rude servant is a crap servant. But a benevolent king or queen is a very rare thing. They don't have any strong reason to be kind but they are kind anyway. So you know they're motivated by values rather than submission or ulterior motives.
Excellently put!
Cheers! I think also assertiveness is a huge distinguishing factor. Sometimes really kind people will have to say what we don't wanna hear in an effort to do what's best for us. They will disagree with us if they disagree. The most agreeable types will not do that. They will say what we wanna hear even if it's bad for us.
I think the best friends and lovers -- the truly kind ones -- will tell us things we might not always wanna hear knowing that we don't wanna hear it. This distinguishes them from a doormat servant type who just strokes people's egos. If a person who seems so nice always agrees with you, chances are that they are like a fan and a servant, not really nice but just saying what we wanna hear.
"Nice" guys & gals are "nice" for themselves. They're what you call fairweather friends. A colleague has a real problem with these. He's very successful but also very, very insecure. He keeps mistaking these leeches as good / overvaluing their worth because he is that insecure.
Genuinely nice people are nice because that is the way they are. They are not nice as a benefit to themselves. They don't expect anything for being nice. Someone taking time to help their senior neighbor unload their groceries, as an example, is a genuinely nice person.
"Here dropped your wallet"
"Here dropped your wallet give me a fiver for returning it"
That's an excellent comparison!
That's a good analogy. Nice "enough" to return it, but expects a reward for doing the right thing. If that happened to me, I'd give it to him and say "too bad you asked for a fiver. I was going to give you $20 just for doing the right thing, but not now".
I think that a lot of people lack empathy towards these types.
There are fake nice people, those who only act nice in order to gain something. These people are usually very entitled and get mad when they don’t get what they want.
There are also genuinely nice people though who get lumped in with those types.
@smashingdoozy mentioned guys who ask why they can’t get dates despite being nice. Some of those might be fake nice. Some of them are just genuinely nice but confused guys looking for advice. I think that they get a lot of unnecessarily hostile reactions for the above reason.
True that, I myself have heard the nice guy speech as a rejection too much. Today I decided to give up on dating at all.
If a girl don't want me I'm okay with that but calling me "nice" in the process of saying no is really confusing. I Learned on this site it means you are an asshole when Girls call you that so I give up.
You are right tho not gonna say it about myself but my Buddy is a genuine nice guy without the quotes he gets destroyed by women he gets to date them but they cheat or Just dump him for no reason. If he would ask a question here he would be attacked for calling himself nice.
"Nice people" pretend to be nice to gain something and expect things in return for their niceness. Actual nice people are nice because they just genuinely are like that and don't feel any entitlement.
One is a façade that people put on in order to appear a certain way often to gain sympathy or manipulate people in a way that favors them.
The other is exactly that a genuinely nice person who's that way naturally and has no ulterior motives regarding the way that they act they're just exactly that a good kind hearted person.
So called ‘nice guys/gals’ are nice to receive something in return for their niceness. A genuinely nice person will do something without expecting a reward. ( or do it just for that ‘good feeling’ that you have done something right or good for someone else).
Honestly... you don’t know until you’ve spent enough time getting to know them. Over time true character reveals itself. One piece of advice I never forgot... you want to see how a person truly acts. Make them angry. Make them angry and see what they do.
A nice guy will flaunt that he is the best you’ll ever have and then call you a bitch if you don’t want him, a nice girl will call you a dick and then claim she would have been the best you’ll ever have if you don’t want her - same approach but done in a different order.
Well even "nice" guys are split into two categories:
You got the nice for a price group that only do nice things for something in return.
And you got nice because he's too scared to take charge in life and prefers being a sissy who blames society for hating nice people.
Either way it's bad.
The key is to take charge of your life and chose to do good because it's the right thing to do.
"nice guys"are nice because they expect something back like love or sex
Genuine guys are nice just to be nice and make people's day a bit better, the most they might ask for in return is friendship, and they'd be completely fine without that too
"Nice Guys/Gals" think being nice makes them unique and is a special personality trait, while genuinely nice people do it without thinking about it.
Perfectly said!
Years ago, I was told by a woman. I was too nice! She would just break my heart. Today, I am thankful. She showed me I lacked balance.
I believe women define the term " nice guy" as a soft push-over, yes man without a spine. A man that caters to their needs without questioning the lunacy. Someone out of balance!
A genuine nice guy is a person that wants the best for you. He will aid in your progress but will not compromise his integrity. He has no problem saying no. He is able to express his feelings. She will know he is supportive but not a doormat...
Genuinely nice people are nice people but nice people are not. That is the logic of anyone who likes to use the term "nice guy/girl" to describe jerks. That context just confuses anyone. This is actually why there are people pretending to be bitches/assholes thinking it's going to attract anyone because of the idea "nice people are fake"
A "Nice Guy/Gal" is someone who does what they consider to be nice with the expectation of some kind of reciprocation, while a genuinely nice person will do something nice because it's the right thing to do and doesn't expect anything in return. If someone thinks "I did all these nice things for someone, why won't they date me," then they were never actually a nice person and whatever good deeds they were doing was just with the intention of getting some kind of desired pay off.
"nice guy/gal" to me = superficial "yesfolks" , who are banal at best and toxic at worst.
Genuinely nice people are those of rational substance, who contribute to society, and are those whom you would want for your BFFs and spouse!
What do you mean by the question, like the genuine nice guys/gals or the phony ones. I know the phony ones both guys and gals are pretending to be nice in order to gain something or get so angry when they hear the word “no” they can’t accept rejection or when someone ignores them and thinks they deserve everything they desire. Example of a phony nice guy: Ross Geller Friends. Phony nice gal Betty Cooper Riverdale. Genuinely nice guys and gals accept the word no and that not everyone in the world is gonna love them and they are nice but don’t accept anything in return. Example of genuine nice guy Peter Kavinsky in To All The Boys I Loved Before and genuinely nice gal Monica Geller Friends. Sorry this is so long haha.
There isn't. "Nice Guy" as a term for guys who pretend to be nice but are in fact manipulative losers just needs to be removed from the language.
Naturally, that's the kind of people I was alluding with the term "Nice Guys/Gals".
That said, there are also genuine nice people who help without wanting anything in return, they are rare but they exists. I've had the luck of meeting some, both here and IRL!
Truly nice people have no need to advertise it.. Where as the fake ones wear it like a badge. Nice people aren't entitled, The fake ones feel entitled because they are supposedly nice. Basically the fake ones are closeted narcissists
I Tell you when I found out been called "nice guy" a lot still don't know how it is something bad 🤷🏻♂️ but it is the reason women give me to not wanna date me🤷🏻♂️ instead of saying they don't have feels or allready have a Boyfriend with both I would accept the rejection no questions asked.
Not gonna be called anymore tho I quit dating. Just career and working on my physique and having fun now
One claims to be a nice person while actually being a complete piece of shit. The other is just a decent person.
One claims to be nice but isn't. The other one just is and has nothing to prove.
The fake nixe person is only nice because they want something in return, whilst the other one is just nice for the sake of being nice.
Nice* stupid typo 😂
The difference is probably that a "nice person" is to a larger degree putting on an act, and doesn't have the strong moral fiber that the kind acts can be based on. A genuinely nice person, is nice because it's swells up from a deep love and caring for other people, and wanting what is best for them.
Simple one. Someone genuinely nice does so for no reason other than to do so.
"Nice guys/girls" are motivated by selfish reasons and believe they are entitled to your time, attention, or some other benefit for them being "nice" to you and their pleasant demeanor is usually a facade.
Well I'm going to keep it short and sweet and I won't say it like this if you're looking for a generously nice person ask this person to give you something cuz you need" help" with a situation and if they want something in return then they are not a generous or nice person.
A “nice guy” thinks being nice is a commendable trait of a great person, while an actual nice person realizes being nice is a prerequisite to being a decent person.
The "Nice" people are kind in the hopes receiving some reward as someone who is genuinely nice is... Just nice no matter what, but are constantly being misread as flirting for being themselves.
Some people will never understand that
genuinely nice people don't need to sell you on it. " I have a good heart" etc... actions, not words.
Perfectly said!
People who complain about not getting dates when they are a "nice" guy it's like what do you mean? You are the absolute bare minimum expectation of a human being?
It's a common misconception for a lonng time, we hear about asshole guys that women date. "Nice" in that context means they don't treat women like objects.
Truly nice people don’t go around calling themselves a “nice girl/guy”, and they don’t feel the need to prove they’re nice, they just are.
Nice people don't need to say that they are nice. You can just feel it, they don't pressure you into something either.
A “nice guy/gal” are manipulative.
However, a truly nice guy/gal are easily taken advantage of.
Thats the difference.
"Nice" is only treating someone above-average than you would any other random woman/random man, because they (the nice guy nice gal) fancy the individual they are being quote unquote nice towards. I've seen it many times the last few years. It's kind of rude. But then who isn't rude. A shame :/
The difference is that word 'genuine'.
"Nice" guys or gals are just putting up an act to try and get close to you, they're lying about who they are and will only reveal their true selfs later.
A genuinely good person is just someone who does good for the sake of doing good, not for any personal gain.
"Nice pretend to be nice and expect good things (dating, sex, attention) in return. The term is misused a lot and you can no longer call yourself good without someone saying you're a "niceguy"
One who is nice to everyone regardless of personal interests is a genuinly nice. Like, helping people, talking to everyone nicely, etc.
One who is nice and expects returns out of it is a false nice person. Like, talking nice only for trying to impress, etc.
There is a difference in dealing with criticism and indifference.
A geuinely nice person treats everyone with kindness and has no ulterior motivates. In saying that, everyone has their limits and eventually they would probably stop making so much effort with people that are assholes.
This isn't my input in relations to this question, but I won't lie,... that girl in the photo is damn cute!
Fake nice people use flattery. They tend to always say the "right thing" at least pubically to appear good socially, but inwardly they are a bunch of pricks secretly.
Well, there isn't much difference as such. If a person is only nice, meaning 100% nice and only have nice qualities then it is absolutely useless in today's world.
Nice people are always nice, not just being nice to achieve their goal.
One has a good personality and it's love by all, the other only wants to feel like Chad and lose its virginity
It doesn't seemed forced and they don't come across as highly charming
I don't understand the question. How are the people you've placed in inverted commas different from those you haven't? A nice person is a nice person, and either you are a nice person or you are not.
Honesty, anyone can act nice, but they always get found out, an honest person puts no front up and you know that they are genuine and trustworthy and a good friend, that's my opinion :)
There’s a big difference between friendly, nice, pleasant and good. People confuse them all the time.
I'm not exactly sure... I feel like I could use some more context 🤔
A genuinely nice person will not screw you over and will always have your back. A "Nice Guy/Gal" will let you walk all over them.
Chris is a “nice” person
in reality he’s a twat
The fake one is a front to get people to like them and comes unmasked when they're casually being themselves usually 1 on 1. The real one doesn't change.
A "nice person" is entitled and gets moody when they don't get what they want. An actually nice person is not.
The real question the OG poster is asking, is can you or other women tell the difference?
It's harder to be nice, you get treated like garbage, as seen as a sign of weakness.
No idea. I am not particularly "nice" but I do often help people who need help. I have learned to be a bit stern and standoffish which people seem to respect more for some reason.
they're nice without expecting something in return
A genuinely nice person doesn’t except anything in return, and they do it without thinking. A nice guy/gal usually has a motive.
expect*
A nice person is just nice. A genuinely nice person is more sincere and believable.
You asked the difference between cute and beautiful
I dnt know what to say
I really don't think there is a "Nice Gal". Society doesn't work like that.
A nice guy is fake and is only doing so to get laid. A genuine nice guy just has good manners.
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