"Nice Guys" are narcissistic assholes pretending to be nice but not actually do.
If Liberals, they're Male Feminists/Soy Boys and tend to be the verbally abusive type (Joss Whedon, JJ Abrams). If Conservatives, they're (actual) Incels and Red Pilled (Elliot Roger). Both sides are generally considered beta males, though. Doesn't matter if they're soy-filled or red-pilled. Beta males are beta males because they completely lack self-respect (but they're still male and still have sexual male urges and needs). So they try to use sneakiness as a tactic to get girls to substitute for self-esteem and assertiveness.
I was never a Nice Guy, but in my early 20s, I came close. The difference between a "Nice Guy" and a lonely shy guy who just wants love is intent. "Nice Guys" think being nice is an unofficial contract with a woman, with niceness being the currency to exchange for sex. Genuine lonely guys who happen to be nice aren't entitled or expecting anything from women (other than basic human respect and decency). They also want more than just sex and won't act demanding and abusive once they actually get a woman's attention.
I've known both types in my twenties, and can tell you the way to avoid being a Nice Guy is to be honest to women, and always have respect for yourself. "Nice Guys" are neither honest, or have respect; for other people or themselves.
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There's no point in using ”...” when talking about nice guys/gals, because the term is already used in a pejorative way.
Those who pretend to be nice use their niceness in a transactional way. It's a fake niceness they would like to trade in for a service. They want sex/attention/admiration in exchange for something apparently nice. They also tend to be passive-aggressive and get mad when you refuse them. A lot of stalkers and creeps believe they are nice guys.
As for someone who is genuinely nice, they don't ask anything in return for being like that. They will help you if you need it, they'll step back if you'll want to and they will never use whatever they did nice for you against you.
I think real character is private and anonymous meaning - your bed is neat and tidy and your job performance is good even if your not being acknowledged when you work and nobody sees your beautiful room. A nice person who is nice for money or social reasons is more of a social dependent and not a social constant.
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"Nice" guys & gals are "nice" for themselves. They're what you call fairweather friends. A colleague has a real problem with these. He's very successful but also very, very insecure. He keeps mistaking these leeches as good / overvaluing their worth because he is that insecure.
Genuinely nice people are nice because that is the way they are. They are not nice as a benefit to themselves. They don't expect anything for being nice. Someone taking time to help their senior neighbor unload their groceries, as an example, is a genuinely nice person.
I think strength and power in some respect. A sheep is not impressive being nice, and its gentleness might be prompted by fear and submission. A gentle lion is much rarer.
It is like a servant is supposed to be kind. A rude servant is a crap servant. But a benevolent king or queen is a very rare thing. They don't have any strong reason to be kind but they are kind anyway. So you know they're motivated by values rather than submission or ulterior motives.
I think that a lot of people lack empathy towards these types.
There are fake nice people, those who only act nice in order to gain something. These people are usually very entitled and get mad when they don’t get what they want.
There are also genuinely nice people though who get lumped in with those types.
@smashingdoozy mentioned guys who ask why they can’t get dates despite being nice. Some of those might be fake nice. Some of them are just genuinely nice but confused guys looking for advice. I think that they get a lot of unnecessarily hostile reactions for the above reason.
"Here dropped your wallet"
"Here dropped your wallet give me a fiver for returning it"
"Nice people" pretend to be nice to gain something and expect things in return for their niceness. Actual nice people are nice because they just genuinely are like that and don't feel any entitlement.
One is a façade that people put on in order to appear a certain way often to gain sympathy or manipulate people in a way that favors them.
The other is exactly that a genuinely nice person who's that way naturally and has no ulterior motives regarding the way that they act they're just exactly that a good kind hearted person.
So called ‘nice guys/gals’ are nice to receive something in return for their niceness. A genuinely nice person will do something without expecting a reward. ( or do it just for that ‘good feeling’ that you have done something right or good for someone else).
Honestly... you don’t know until you’ve spent enough time getting to know them. Over time true character reveals itself. One piece of advice I never forgot... you want to see how a person truly acts. Make them angry. Make them angry and see what they do.
A nice guy will flaunt that he is the best you’ll ever have and then call you a bitch if you don’t want him, a nice girl will call you a dick and then claim she would have been the best you’ll ever have if you don’t want her - same approach but done in a different order.
Well even "nice" guys are split into two categories:
You got the nice for a price group that only do nice things for something in return.
And you got nice because he's too scared to take charge in life and prefers being a sissy who blames society for hating nice people.
Either way it's bad.
The key is to take charge of your life and chose to do good because it's the right thing to do.
Years ago, I was told by a woman. I was too nice! She would just break my heart. Today, I am thankful. She showed me I lacked balance.
I believe women define the term " nice guy" as a soft push-over, yes man without a spine. A man that caters to their needs without questioning the lunacy. Someone out of balance!
A genuine nice guy is a person that wants the best for you. He will aid in your progress but will not compromise his integrity. He has no problem saying no. He is able to express his feelings. She will know he is supportive but not a doormat...
"nice guys"are nice because they expect something back like love or sex
Genuine guys are nice just to be nice and make people's day a bit better, the most they might ask for in return is friendship, and they'd be completely fine without that too
"Nice Guys/Gals" think being nice makes them unique and is a special personality trait, while genuinely nice people do it without thinking about it.
A "Nice Guy/Gal" is someone who does what they consider to be nice with the expectation of some kind of reciprocation, while a genuinely nice person will do something nice because it's the right thing to do and doesn't expect anything in return. If someone thinks "I did all these nice things for someone, why won't they date me," then they were never actually a nice person and whatever good deeds they were doing was just with the intention of getting some kind of desired pay off.
"nice guy/gal" to me = superficial "yesfolks" , who are banal at best and toxic at worst.
Genuinely nice people are those of rational substance, who contribute to society, and are those whom you would want for your BFFs and spouse!
What do you mean by the question, like the genuine nice guys/gals or the phony ones. I know the phony ones both guys and gals are pretending to be nice in order to gain something or get so angry when they hear the word “no” they can’t accept rejection or when someone ignores them and thinks they deserve everything they desire. Example of a phony nice guy: Ross Geller Friends. Phony nice gal Betty Cooper Riverdale. Genuinely nice guys and gals accept the word no and that not everyone in the world is gonna love them and they are nice but don’t accept anything in return. Example of genuine nice guy Peter Kavinsky in To All The Boys I Loved Before and genuinely nice gal Monica Geller Friends. Sorry this is so long haha.
Genuinely nice people are nice people but nice people are not. That is the logic of anyone who likes to use the term "nice guy/girl" to describe jerks. That context just confuses anyone. This is actually why there are people pretending to be bitches/assholes thinking it's going to attract anyone because of the idea "nice people are fake"
I Tell you when I found out been called "nice guy" a lot still don't know how it is something bad 🤷🏻♂️ but it is the reason women give me to not wanna date me🤷🏻♂️ instead of saying they don't have feels or allready have a Boyfriend with both I would accept the rejection no questions asked.
Not gonna be called anymore tho I quit dating. Just career and working on my physique and having fun now
There isn't. "Nice Guy" as a term for guys who pretend to be nice but are in fact manipulative losers just needs to be removed from the language.
Truly nice people have no need to advertise it.. Where as the fake ones wear it like a badge. Nice people aren't entitled, The fake ones feel entitled because they are supposedly nice. Basically the fake ones are closeted narcissists
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