I’ve just turned 30 and he’s nearly 44, do I go on the date even though I’m 50/50?

[Anonymous]

Hello! So I’ve been speaking to a guy the last month or so, it wasn’t my intention to carry on speaking to him as to be honest he’s the opposite of what I was looking for, but the conversation flowed so easily I kind of fell into it. He’s a professional athlete in motorbike racing so as you do, I looked him up, he hasn’t mentioned his age to me…. but he’s almost 44 (says on his racing stats). The oldest I would really want to go is 38. Here is my pros and cons list because I’m so 50/50 and need help!

Pros
Hilarious
Honest
Got his life together
Can cook as he also does cheffing on the side (bonus)
No children / No divorces
Physically attractive

Cons

I’m 30 and want 2-3 children which means he’ll only be starting at 45 at least

He’s been single for 8 years because of his injuries from racing (said it wouldn’t have been fair to have w relationship when he was constantly in and out of hospital)

I’m very active and energetic and love the outdoors and he can’t do certain things due to half his body being metal. He’s physically fit but can’t go hiking up mountains etc (sometbjng I like to do regularly)

I’m so torn. I can’t deny the man is hilarious and someone that can make you belly laugh is rare to find, but the fact I want quite a big family and with him already being practically 44 and so many injuries already makes me question it. He seems very keen as well and I’m scared of I agree to a date he’s going to be going all in and planning a future where I’m still really on the fence with it all!

[Anonymous]

I think you should try it. I'm in the best relationship of my life with a man 19 years older. I never would have dreamed of going that high, but since I have I've the best relationship I've ever had.

There's actually a lot of advantages of dating older men. They're more mature, they know what they want, they're more financially secure, the sex is actually better (know what they're doing), I feel like they're more attracted to you, and more committed to you. I think the fact my boyfriend is so much older is actually a big plus for all those reasons

Have you talked to him about wanting kids? If he wants them then it shouldn't be a problem (men don't have a biological clock). However, if he doesn't that would be an issue. However, it would still be an issue if a guy you were dating who was your age didn't want kids.

[kidvid80]

if you are questioning it yourself then you are hesitating. meaning you aren't that into it. if you liked him that much there would be no doubts in your mind even with the few cons you have. literally have a talk that you aren't really sure what you are looking for being only 30 and you might actually be at very different stages in life, being upfront and honest with him and a conversation would be the adult thing to do - goodluck!

[Anonymous]

Going on a date doesn't mean you're agreeing to spend the rest of your life with him. I suggest going on the date and see what happens. Don't hesitate to discuss your concerns about the age difference and children.

[TurboKid]

A date isn't a marriage proposal. You can see how it goes.

[TurboKid]

Do you have some alternative guys lined up or better things to do on a weekend? If not, maybe just have some fun and go on the date. Don't do anything you don't want to do.

[Asker]

At the moment I don’t no, I’ve been on a few dates but they just haven’t been the people I’m looking for! I just don’t want to lead someone on and I feel a bit under pressure already if that makes sense!

[TurboKid]

It's inevitable with dates that we might disappoint some people if they don't work out. If he's interested in you and you're not, you're going to have to summon up a voice at some point to reject him properly so that you don't lead him on. But if you're really not sure, then going on a date can help you make up your mind.

[Asker]

It’s literally since I’ve found out his age…. it’s like this wall has come down now and just totally changed the way I feel - it shouldn’t and I know everyone says she is just a number…. but sometimes it isn’t!

[TurboKid]

You can explore that wall if you want. It's just a date. Fun and good times. Have some fun. You get power over yourself and liberate yourself and you can enjoy even dates with people you're iffy about. You keep yourself shackled by doubts and maybe life will pass you by. You don't have to marry him again. Maybe the date goes terribly and now you can be sure he's not your one. All we gotta do is have some fun.

[Alyssa11]

Meet him and then decide. It's hard to decide without seeing each other face to face.

[TommyMountainFigure]

Don't be fooled by age. Someone fit and healthy can live well into their 90's

[es20490446e]

https://youtu.be/wHzKK-6eEfA

[zagor]

I have a relative who had his first kid at 56, and now has two. Don't worry about that aspect, assuming HE wants kids.

[Iron_Man]

That’s up to you to decide I can do all these things

[anylolone]

Good question, a question you should be answer better than me.

[Browneye57]

Uh, no. Foggedaboudit. For a LOT of reasons.

[Luckycharms12]

No if 50/50 not that interested

[awanti95]

Go ahead

[jimmy2]

Opposite attracts

[Jmmmfi4]

either go or don't