What is your best advice for someone who just got dumped. They were together for 5 years?

Question

Citizenkirk · Accepted Answer

I would offer to hold onto any firearms and ammunition they own if they don't have a relative or close friend who lives close by. Then, once all firearms and explosives have been safely secued, I'd take him or her too a bar with an all you can eat taco and cocktail franks, meetballd, and crackers @ cheese type happy hour snack buffet located in the restroom facilities of Girls ask Guys (Just kidding about taking them there🤨, you don't really think I would deliberately encourage them too kill themselves, do you😳),---but seriously, I'd take them to a bar with free food they can keep in thier stomach after I open a bar tab and get them plastered. Over the next few excruciatingly painful hours of sitting there listening to a sob story of how he or she, was the entire world to the sobbing ♂️or♀️smuck sitting next to me, indicating the bartender keep em coming intravenous style, occasionally calling the letch or tramp that broke their heart an asshole, bitch, peckerhead, skank, for emotional empathy support effect --. Or, if this person is someone who takes constructive criticism well, and actually respects my point of view enough to listen and maybe benifit from any suggestions or observations of mine that may help explain thier breakup... No, scratch that. Inconvenient truths are not a good idea when talking to a sad person in the process of pickling thier brains with near lethal quantities of alcohol while distracting them from thinking about the option of french kissing the muzzle of a loaded 44 magnum revolver with the safety disengaged. Better to dump that honestly, tough love 🐂💩 in Thier lap when they are sober, after hangover recovery and shower, when the only thing available to shoot me with is🖕🤬.
Anyway, once last call is served, half carry stumbling him or her too the waiting taxi cab the bartender was good enough to call for us, get them home, too the 🧻nearest🚽available, and hold his or her hair up if it's long, so they don't have chunky hair to wake up to from a vigorous bout of 🤮, get them to bed, place a 5 gallon bucket next to them, making sure they acknowledge it being there so -- well, you know, I don't need to make you and I 🤮 too with graphic details, do I😳?
Also, show them the plastic drinking glass full of water on thier night stand, to cut the hangover time in half with hydration preventive medicine, go to thier living room couch, and crash.

yoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyo · Accepted Answer

All things come to an end.

However

When a door closes another opens.

That chapter of life had to close, you just got to prepare to write the next one.

It can be hard at first, but there's complications that couldn't be seen or couldn't resolve.

Just be the champ you are, get up, brush yourself off, and keep going twice as hard, because that's the fighting spirit

And remember what you learned about the last relationship!! Otherwise if you didn't learn anything, things will be repeated.

And don't look for a SO the same as last time, or problems are bound to repeat.

Cynicaldreamer · Accepted Answer

Things always happen for a reason. It might seem like the end of the world now, or you'll never find anyone like them again. But you will.

In the meantime focus on YOU. Cry, scream, vent, whatever you need to do. Then you need to take time to assess what you want: not just relationship wise, but for yourself as well.

Five years is a long time to invest in someone, only to be dumped: and no, it's NOT fair to invest all your time, energy, and love in someone only for them to toss you aside. I'd be ticked too! Hell I might swear off dating for a while (oh wait... lol).

Actually you know what... disregard the above-

Instead of filling their heads with cliche words, or tell them how they can do "so much better..." or "it was their loss!"
I'd be there for them, offer to listen, take them out and distract them... basically be there for them!

Because no matter what you say, it's not going to instantly cure or make them feel better. They need a friend or support system more than anything. Even if it's just to call, text, or stop by to make sure they're okay. That's way better than offering false hopes and words to someone with a broken heart.

Dazed0N0Confused · Accepted Answer

Having been in those shoes, although mine was a divorce not a breakup, i would tell them that they are still amazing & that this is a great opportunity to learn about yourself & grow into a better person. They are not the same person they were when they started the relationship & they will not be the same person tomorrow. They will be a stronger person for getting through this.

I died inside, i was dead for a long time after my marriage fell through, we were together for 7yrs (married for 1, separated for an additional 2 before the divorce went through (not counted in the 7yrs together)). It took a lot of duck tape at first to patch myself back up, slowly i was able to use more permanent solutions to fix & get myself to a place where i was better than before my ex-husband left me. It's a slow process, at least for me it was, and it'll take time, but they'll get to the place where it doesn't bother them any longer in their own time.

Brainsbeforebeauty · Answer

I don't know as there's any advice that will take away the pain... I'd more offer an ear to listen, a shoulder to cry on, and arms for a hug if they need... Oh and a big bottle of wine...

OlderAndWiser · Answer

I hope this question does not reflect events in your private life!

Anonymous · Answer

Right now, you're upset and at your core is the fear that you'll never find someone like her or better than her, ever again.

This isn't true. Get out there. Find a new girl, she doesn't have to be "the" one, but she should be enough to put some distance between you and the ex. Silence the inner fear that says you're not datable, you're not fuckable, or that no other woman will ever find you attractive. Once you've beaten that demon, you won't let the desperation to have someone/anyone in your life, make you look at that ex through rose-tinted glasses.

Anonymous · Answer

Let things sink in and cry it out, it’s better to get over things then ignore them or else they will keep popping up and you’ll never really overcome it. Go see a friend and talk about it, venting should make you feel better. Be a better version of yourself, mentally and physically. Maybe get a gym membership, dye your hair, work on yourself. You should start to feel better after awhile. Heartbreak hurts but it’ll eventually go away, just don’t loose yourself in the process , it’s easy to do so but remember everyone deserves to feel wanted and loved so don’t lower your self value during this state. You are worth it. Remember this, if they liked you enough to be with you someone else will.

natured · Answer

There is not much details given for this one, because it all depends what happened. It's really hard to give good and helpful advice to someone that is going through a break up. It's hard for people in that state, nut because they feel pain because of the break up itself, but getting used to new surroundings, getting used to the new unknown.
But as long as you are there for the person they will appreciate it a lot, try to distract hem by going out, cinema, dinnerlunch and stuff.

ImSparkly · Answer

Feel what you've got to feel, it's natural and normal. Get outside yourself, volunteer to read books to homeless kids and go running/exercise.
Most of all though, take some time and find yourself and who you are. Your identity changed as a couple and now you need to figure out your own identity, apart from them. Don't rush it.

exitseven · Answer

Don;t feel like you failed. Relationships run their course and now it is over. I know it sucks but it happens to lots of people. You will survive it. after some time you will not think about the pain and will concentrate on the good experiences you had.
You will find somebody better.

Tiptoetamm · Answer

Work on yourself and don't be afraid to be single, independence is very important to learn and become a better person and see what you can achieve. I know I need no one to survive I do quite well by myself

purplepoppy · Answer

Nail his doors and windows shut and burn his house down

somesoul · Answer

Kill the feelings, hookup fuck a lot, drunk sex. Chnage partners then finally have a break from men for 1-2 years and start dating again with a serious relationship intent.

Alyssa11 · Answer

I don’t have advice. I’d say just push through things will start feeling better one day lol.

electricjohn · Answer

It will hurt, it will matter, it will take a while a probably a long time, we are with you, we will support you and may be not today, may be not the next month but you eventually get over it

cth96190 · Answer

Read what has been published about the chemistry of love, which is a delusional mental state that is created by endorphins and hormones.
Then, turn to the Dark Side and feel the hate flow through you.
When you turn pain into hate, dealing with it becomes easier.
When the day comes that you see her burning in a karmic fire that she created, savour every moment of the schadenfreude.

Wiredone · Answer

I'd go hang out with my buddies, have a beer or two just to get my mind off her. You have to keep your mind occupied to get over her otherwise you will just dwell on it

DeltaCharlieEcho · Answer

Go to the gym, find a hobby, make new friends. To go into any other advice, I’d need to know the age but generally the next step of advice is to not rush into the next thing.

sparklerain · Answer

Eat your feelings
Lots of ice-cream and crying
(ik it's unhealthy but that's what i do)
Why you're a little better do something you like to get your mind off things
And NEVER blame yourself about anything
Don't be harsh on yourself

princeofromance · Answer

Take your tttttime to get over the breakup before moving on. Otherwise, You will end up miserable in your next relationship as well.

HairyPoppins · Answer

My advice is to leave them alone. Sometimes they just need space not comforting words or hugs.

hahahmm · Answer

Block their number. Keep it moving. Focus on life goals and look at it as a blessing that you're not stuck with someone who was wrong for you.

DaveToo · Answer

I was together with my last S/O for 8 years. She dumped me for some black guy with a lot more money. You just deal with it. Nothing I can do to change that.

jimmy2 · Answer

One day at a time and do no decisions making thats important

Avicenna · Answer

Find distractions to get their mind off of it.

JesseJayNeak · Answer

Try ice-cream. It cools down the pain (pun intended). Also, it worked for me

Anonymous · Answer

Meet your new best friend, hard liquor

Anonymous · Answer

Go get a rebound piece.

kevyhanma · Answer

Just be alone

What is your best advice for someone who just got dumped. They were together for 5 years?

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What is your best advice for someone who just got dumped. They were together for 5 years?

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