My boyfriend invited his ex to his party?

[WinCx3d]

I over heard my boyfriend inviting his ex to his party. My boyfriend talks to his ex regularly they seem close. I’m not an insecure woman so i don’t think anything of it

Today he FaceTimed her while at my house. And when she answered he went into the other room. And he starts telling her about the party.
She says well i don’t know about going
So he starts asking her why and then he says “are you not going because I’m going to be there” then he says “bring your mom your sister your cousin to the party just come and i been missing you too so yeah come”

So she says “well you got a girlfriend so i don’t think that’s a good idea” and he says “I’m single i don’t owe you or nobody else nothing”
Then he said if you don’t wanna talk or deal with me anymore just say that” “even if you don’t i know you’re going to text me again sooner or later asking to see me”

TL:DR; am i overreacting or am i underreacting? I don’t think she should be invited to go

[Interstate]

Ok look at the sentence immediately after she says, "well you got a girlfriend...". THAT is your red flag there!! He is still carrying a torch for her, and he wants her back; And you were just the rebound. It is time for you to tell him you had overheard the entire conversation, and that you are walking away. It is also clear that he doesn't care for/about you (that goes w/o say).

But the BIG red flag was before the conversation. You said in the first paragraph that they are close... obviously the relationship never completely died (to him). WinCx3d... your relationship is over. She is obviously his priority, and you are in the past. It is time to move on with life 😞

[OlderAndWiser]

She tells him "you have a girlfriend" and he responds "I'm single and I don't owe nothing to nobody."

That would be enough for me to end the relationship.

[Livewire3]

Do you live with this guy? Then he actually does owe you something... along the lines of courtesy and consideration. Did you go into the relationship knowing it was an open relationship? If that has not been discussed you need to consider if you are okay with that or not, then discuss. If you are okay with it, make it clear the door swings both ways. Meaning you may also find other men to keep company with however you choose... or women if you'd like.

[midnightmoon05]

Not surprise… you are hooking up with other guys… so.. I don’t see the prob.
Who is taking care of your kid?
and you are pregnant with someone else’s kid…
I would be too stress to deal with men if I was in your situation… not that I would ever be in that situation.

[Flower7]

You're very much UNDERreacting by continuing to date this guy. He's telling other women he's single and disrespects you by talking to another woman while in your presence. It's already not a good situation to start with when a guy hangs out with his ex on a regular basis.

[WinCx3d]

They don’t hang out they do talk though

[Flower7]

That's still too much.

And to be honest, you don't know for sure whether they see each other in person or not. Also, when he was talking to her, he mentioned her asking to see him. Maybe that's something that's happened already.

[Robin83]

I think you are being naive. He is definitely cheating on you. It’s a fact he is not fully committed to you. Friendship between men and women is not a thing. It’s either sexually motivated, family, co-worker, or nothing.

Remember though. Unless he never fully committed to you, You can keep any man you want if you put your mind to it, by keeping him happy. It’s important that you learn what has gone wrong, it’s an important experience.

The first thing you should do is to sit down with him and talk rationally about what you want for the future, what he wants to do in the future and if that includes both of you. Make sure you know what you want though. If he doesn’t, let him go, he might be wasting your time by being confused and indecisive. Pick a man who knows what he wants, and join his frame.

[kyleelyn199723]

“I am not an insecure woman” well clearly by your definition , you are an insecure woman if you think she shouldn’t be invited to the party even though they are close still. I think your personal problem is you are allowing WAY too many of your personal boundaries to be broken here because you love this man way too much to the point where you don’t value yourself or your boundaries.

[WinCx3d]

I mean i trust him but he is pressing her to come

[kyleelyn199723]

I think you just need to throw that “insecure woman “ thing out the Window and realize you have a right to feel how you feel. Don’t be okay with him pushing your boundaries

[Andres77]

He shouldn't be talking to her.
He can miss her, fine.
But if he's in a relationship with you then he should put her in his past.
If he's not over her... he should not be using you as a comfort girl while he figures out what to do.
If he's still so stuck on her he should not be in a relationship with you.
He's using you.
Stand up for yourself before he hurts you even more.
Inviting her and her family to the party is blatantly disrespectful to you.

[WinCx3d]

But he’s also inviting every as well

[Andres77]

Meh... I'd still be wary.
She seems to get a lot of attention for an ex when he's now with you.

[t-8900]

Woah there's a difference between being secure and this. I dont like how this sounds and I wouldn't trust him on this. He's being shady, doesn't sound like he values you. Cut him loose on your terms before he really hurts you. I used to think you could have platonic friendships between sexes, trust me one party is always wanting more from the other at some level, degree. Be very, very careful. Wish you the best.

[WinCx3d]

I mean he did invite everyone to the party

[t-8900]

sounds like a good camouflage to me. But if you trust him you trust him. Try to stay sober that night, keep an eye out. All's I'm gonna say. It can't hurt to remain alert, right?

[Jake99999]

He is not committed to you. He continues to flirt with his ex. And you heard his comments “I am single…”. If you continue to see him just realize he feels no commitment. If that bothers you, just dump him. He clearly is not really into to you. FaceTiming his ex when you are with him - and he goes into the next room…that is just really disrespectful to you under any circumstance.

[Finchie40]

Sounds like you need to dump this douchebag as soon as possible period , He only cares about himself and totally disrespecting you, Even though you said it doesn’t bother you , it should , cuz that is disrespectful behavior , he isn’t thinking of your feelings he is only thinking what is best for himself , Run while you can , you are dealing with a selfish piece of shit , His ex girlfriend has more respect for you then he does lol I don’t know where you girl’s find these guys , scary shit

[hahahmm]

Are you seriously even asking? He told her that he's single, while standing in YOUR home. 1.) He doesn't respect you. Unless you just want to be a whore this is a problem 2.) He's looking to screw her. 3.) he's probably telling other women the same stuff. See #1.

Get some self respect and dump him.

[SerenStone]

“I’m single i don’t owe you or nobody else nothing”
That's the biggest red flag in all relationships. Even if it was a joke. It's a sick joke if it is.
It's not bragging or bad to say "I have a partner".

Save your time and end the relationship.

[btbc92]

He's cheating. What part of you hearing him cheating on you do you not get? The ex is not the issue. It's your two timing boyfriend!

[es20490446e]

If I was the boy, and my ex was having this conversation with me, I would feel really weird. I won't accept going to such party.

If I was in you place, listening to my partner saying that they are single and owes nothing to anybody, I would confront them instantly.

If there wasn't a meaningful reply to that I would dump them immediately.

[Pj1981]

You aren't overreacting at all. You wouldn't be overreacting to send him on his way. Sorry but it really sounds like he's still open to be with her. If kids aren't involved and your in a new relationship your ex needs to be just that an ex and left at the end of that relationship. Even if you remain friends on good terms it's just not respectful to the new relationship to invite exes to parties without at least talking to the person your with first.

[slatyb]

He should have asked you before inviting her. I feel that inviting her without considering your feelings is disrespectful.

[serious]

What I can understand from this is his actions are highly inappropriate given the fact that he has a girlfriend now.

His words clearly indicates he has no respect for you or the relationship and only does what he wants.

[DonkeyDan]

Screw being worried about her coming to the party, your boyfriend just told his ex he's single. There should be red flags and sirens going off all around you. Dump that dirtbag on the curb with the rest of the trash!

[dezzydoodles]

Girl no he said he's single so break up with him so it becomes truth if you're not jealous move on love don't stay with someone unloyal enough to go to a different too to talk to an ex and claim he's single and doesn't owe u anything

[bowenw]

You are not overacting. If he wants to be with her you should dump him.

[humanearth]

Going into the other room to talk to her. Red flag to me. Im just saying

[SecretsofKB]

I'm confused... you called him your boyfriend, yet he tells his ex he is single?

[WinCx3d]

He told her he was single over the phone

[SecretsofKB]

Hun, it's good that you're not insecure, but you also need to be a bit less naive...

He's telling his EX that you aren't in a relationship... while he is in the process of almost begging her to come to his party...

This is a problem that extends beyond just this party...

You need to either put your foot down and set some serious ground rules and boundries for his relationship with his ex, or you need to leave him, because he doesn't seem to be invested in you at all...

[WinCx3d]

Where in the world did he beg her lol he’s I’m inviting everyone apparently

[SecretsofKB]

He invited her first, but when she declined, he then invited her family. Seems like he's doing a lot to try to get her there. To me, it seems like begging.

He really doesn't sound like a good boyfriend.

[Anon621]

I mean the fact that he mentioned he was single that would definitely ring alarm bells in my head personally if he's gonna disrespect you like that. I would recommend ending the relationship as soon as possible