Low Effort Boyfriend?

[heyhey100]

My boyfriend of a year is VERY low effort, low effort with school (can't even go a semester without taking a gap), doesn't go out much, etc. In the beginning of our relationship we never had any stereotypical first dates because it was the quarantine. However, now that things have gotten more normal over the past few months he has only taken me to a sit down date... ONCE. We didn't even do anything for our anniversary even though I got him gifts, he didn't do anything for me, not even to make up for it. I have recently been stressing how I want to go on actual dates and I don't think he is even capable of planning one. I do not want to take the lead and show him because I want him to just be a man and look it up or even ask me. For the next time I see him I do not plan on meeting him at his house unless he has a set place to take me. Am I wrong for this? Is there something I should be doing or is there something I am missing?

[slatyb]

Yes, there is something you should be doing -- dating someone with their life together. Do you imagine this is going to change? He sounds depressed to me, but if he refuses to seek treatment this is going to continue indefinitely. He can't go to school, he probably won't be able to hold a job. What are you getting out of this? Is he the first man that ever gave you any attention?

End this waste of time so you can meet a functioning adult.

[awkward_author]

He's not the right guy for you if that's what you want. There's nothing wrong with your desire. You just need to find a man who can fulfill that.

[VikingWarLord]

You need to date older DADDIES like me.
I'm bein serious

[In_Trance]

Have you had the conversation with him about this? What was the feedback?

[heyhey100]

I did, and he doesn't seem as remorseful as I would like him to be. It is infuriating because I want to SEE actual initiative, but I think he is just all talk. I told him yesterday I want him to take me on a normal date and plan it and just like show effort, but his excuse was that we just went on a date recently ( a double date, that was 2 weeks ago)

[In_Trance]

So it's time for you make a decision. You put up with it or you move on

[whosnumber1]

you should move on. find a guy who is a doer. find a guy who is motivated. your wasting your time

[mark000h]

How are you even dating someone like this?

[Ray123456]

Your boyfriend sounds strikingly similar to me..