I’m a little nervous to date this guy?

Question

Hello! I’m a little nervous to date this guy I met online a few days ago. He seemed really sweet but when we were talking about certain religious views I wasn’t sure if we would be compatible necessarily long term…. and I told him I wasn’t too sure anymore because my views (Catholicism) are important to me and he of course is entitled to his own views (atheism) but I wasn’t sure how our different views would tie into our lifestyles. I made him upset and I didn’t mean to and I’ve been feeling like a horrible person because he’s mad at me and he said he wouldn’t want to be my friend and he told me I shouldn’t have made him upset and started telling me how bad I am so I told him I can drop my beliefs if he wants me to because I didn’t mean to be a bad person…. and he started saying that I’m too crazy over religion to do that etc……so I apologized and said that I don’t think I want to really date anyone anymore because I’m nervous and that it wasn’t his fault or anything (and I stayed up all night trying to not make him upset with me). But every time I bring it up to stay friends he says he’ll change his mind and that of course he was upset because i basically broke up with him…. and that he’s looking forward to being a couple and I’m sorry this is long and confusing I’m just nervous and upset and I don’t know what to do because I didn’t mean to hurt his feelings….

please help me I would really appreciate it

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

I would say stay true to your beliefs. If he isn't prepared to accept your true self, and he demands YOU to change, he doesn't love you for who you are.

He likely wants to use you.

When you are in love you accept and adore your partner for who they are. My grandmother has lived for 95 years, through many deaths and tragedies, and she said it is her Catholic faith that keeps her going. She's outgoing, independent and very mobile for her age.

"Trust in the lord" she says. Her results speak for themselves.

boombastik · Accepted Answer

All religions are man-made, created to control us. Yes I believe in God and Jesus but Christianity as people know it is not at all what it was created as and catholicism is not what people think. Look and study the symbolism that the pope wears in his uniform. He himself is not worshipping catholicism but serving another and taking orders from the black pope. The Bible is nothing more than the devil's war book used to mislead and get us to use our own freewill to lead us astray with all the changes and omissions,

melanieeeB · Accepted Answer

Never trop what's important to you, just to please someone else!
Be you and if he doesn't like it, then he should go and make room for someone who will care.

Also I don't like how you belittle yourself while explaining.

Leave his ass, you will find someone better and religion isn't a big problem. Like my ex was also catholic and I'm a non religious person but it didn't matter, i respected his beliefs and he mine and everything else matched too

PrettyPriya · Accepted Answer

You have to be comfortable with who you are dating. You can't force something. My suggestion is to sit down and talk about it and really determine if you can deal with it.

My religion and my fiancé's religion couldn't be more different as we are from two entirely different cultures/countries. We make it work though!

LaNc3L0TT · Answer

First I understand that you like this guy, but It is somehow selfish from his side to push those topics and you are "fresh" in dating/relationship. I think those topics are for something later on. Because why to rush with that kind of questions and talks I mean go easy it is not like you are getting married next week...
And second why would you change your life for something you just meet and specially over date app/online. Take your time and go easy with it, and tbh from your story I don't like him cuz he is acting so pushy f that.

Justerino · Answer

My grandmother left her first love over religion, she was a Jehovahs Witness and he was a Catholic, it was too much of a difference - she chose to be with an atheist instead. My mom raised me Catholic and went to Catholic school from K-12.

You’re young though, those views definitely evolve over time maybe you could use this to learn more about yourself and eachother. But him yelling at you is a red flag. Tell him to respect you more and work on your communication, it will serve you well in the future.

AbruvAvgMatt · Answer

Not sure why this dude is getting so upset, he could have just amicably accepted your differences. I feel like online guys like him are more likely to want hookups over relationships as opposed to people in real life, so being Catholic may have been his obstacle considering they ban premarital sex. To be honest, it's actually one of the minor reasons I'm no longer Catholic myself. I am also guilty of seeming sweet as a kid to gain general favors so I would be more aware of that for next time.

No guarantees but I would wager a lot of churches have decent communities to meet people. Look for events like fairs and concerts and try to enjoy yourself because you might just naturally find someone along the way. One of the best ways to meet someone is to go out and have fun doing what you like.

DonkeyDan · Answer

Big red flags, he can't accept that you are the religion you are and don't necessarily want to date an atheist. You should never change your beliefs for someone else. Have some integrity and block this guy, he sounds like a real drama queen and bad news.

Anonymous · Answer

Personally being a strong/devout Catholic myself I'd say not to go for anyone outside your religion. I know you might think he is a great, nice, good person but values are important and eventually he will show his true colours one way or another deep into the relationship.

If you are looking at learning more about christian dating and finding the right person for you etc. I'd highly suggest you get resources and read up on books by Jason Evert. He has a website called the chastity project (https://chastity. com/) and suggest you look at this for christian dating advice.

Anonymous · Answer

He's scum to be nice lol. You simply expressed your beliefs and concerns, and while you might have expressed them too soon or over thought it, you still were only doing that, but he's turned it around and made it about you and made you feel bad for having them. It's WHO YOU ARE! He doesn't like it, then go away. You're better off without him. But there's no reason at all to make you feel bad for being who you are.

driven159 · Answer

first off people don't respect each other's way of life anymore so it's hard if there is a big difference in lifestyles, so you need to find someone closer to your ideals he was not mint for you

JoyGirl · Answer

Yeaaaa, it won’t work out. Be there, done that.  I would say date someone within your religion.

QuietRunner · Answer

the my come into conflict the longer the relationships goes on

it is easier for him to ignore your beliefs if he chooses

if he wants to make you accept his beliefs as the only one then it will be a problem

Jerre · Answer

If his feelings get hurt by something you described, do NOT go out with him.

Yourfriend2021 · Answer

It depends, maybe it won't work out in the long run, but beliefs shouldn't run your life.

FamilyGuy2020 · Answer

Don't ever apologize because of your religion the judge needs to see this

I’m a little nervous to date this guy?

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