Who should initiate a hug in a first date?

[Anonymous]

If your going on a coffee date with someone who you met only briefly from a speed dating event, what gender should initiate the hug?

Should men step forward and take the lead or would doing so be potentially uncomfortable for the woman?

Men

Women

[J2ohhhhh]

She arrives. You don't have to be like a labrador on amphetamine who spent the past 23 hours in a 120 square feet apartment without a walk, but you don't have to hide that you're happy to see her either. So you loudly greet her with a smile on your face and hug her.

Bonus tip: make a habit of greeting your friends and family with a hug so it comes more naturally.

[OddBeMe]

Either. Same with a kiss at the end of a date. 90-10 rule. Go 90% and let her or him make the 10% decision.

[midnightmoon05]

Depends on how it went. You generally can tell within a few minutes if both are enjoying the time.
If you sense she likes you… you can smile and open your arms.
if she changes her position in a negative way.. she did you a favor…move on… otherwise ask to hang out again after the happy hug.

[McKellar]

Provided if she still doesn't get creeped out first.

[midnightmoon05]

@McKellar “depends how it went”
That you should be able to judge her behavior. If both are normal healthy people.

[Pinay_ako]

depends if I’m feeling it. 🤣 or how it went? If I like him enough or him to me to warrant a hug.

[McKellar]

You sure? That still can always be different.

[coachTanthony]

Just go in for the hug... quit crying about ME TOO and sexual assaults lol

[Guy13]

I did not know there was an etiquette for hugging... What is it please?

[ShellyB]

The short answer is the girl will hug if she wants to, which I think is not a sure thing and may not even be a positive sign if she does. Basically I wouldn't worry about it too much except, if you are a guy, just go along with whatever she does with hugging or not hugging.

The long answer is that hugging friends is normal for us, we do it a few times a day usually it is no big deal, but in this situation, we may just not even think about it and hug because that is normal, or we may try to calculate "will he take it the wrong way if I hug him, will I seem cold or stuck up if I do not hug" in which case it will probably be about her comfort level with you, not necessarily if she is into you just whether she thinks you will get weird if she hugs you.

[KAT247]

When I met the guy I’m currently dating for the first date, he initiated a hug. It felt natural. However, if he didn’t initiate a hug, I would have. It just depends on how it feels with the person and how comfortable you are with them.

[DancingQueen16]

Well this wasn't a date but last December I gave my crush who's also one of my best friends I bracelet that I made for him and he really liked it and he gave me a hug for the first time ever and after that he started hugging me on almost a daily basis

[MysteriousDarkness]

It shouldn't matter who initiates it first unless one person gives signals they don't want to be hugged then you let them decide when to initiate hugging. Overall there is no rull as to who should initiate the asking out, hug, first text or call after the date etc.

[MountAverage]

Why do you want there to be a rule one way or the other? Why does it have to be one gender over the other? Why "should" anyone? Why not just let people do whatever feels right for them in the specific situation and circumstances instead of trying to make it some universal rule for one gender to act a certain way in every such situation? This is just dumb.

[Summeroflove]

I don't think it matters. If you even hug at all being honest. If someone wants a hug then they should try for a hug.

[Hairylegs222]

I always ask beforehand when texting before meeting. They all said yes. Better to get permission beforehand rather than initiate a move, get rejected, then it gets awkward and most likely ruined any chance of being comfortable with each other.

[Hairylegs222]

This has worked well from my years of experience from dating and relationships. Saying this since someone disagreed.

[Rosexøxø]

I think the waiter should.

lol for real, the girl should. She should ask too because some people just aren’t comfortable it’s hugs 🤷‍♀️

[katiesmuff]

I think it is the woman's place to initiate a first hug on a first date or just in general. I know I pretty much am the one who initiates the hug even when meeting with friends.

[MCheetah]

Women. If guys do it nowadays, it's potentially "sexual assault." All because some women are pieces of sh*t who'd say that.

[slatyb]

I divorced and started dating in my 30's. I don't remember much about who initiated what. Women let me know what they wanted, usually non-verbally, and I obliged them.

[summiter]

I think whoever feels more comfortable making the first move. Do you think a kiss should be first or a hug?

[Chazmatazz269]

All contact should be initiated by women until men stop losing their lives and livelihoods for doing so.

[AviatorTom]

A hug should be initiated by whoever wants to hug the other person. There's no hard and fast rule.

[LovingLoverReturned]

Whoever's name starts with A @Aakash_Hangargi is my only contact name starting tih A

[Aakash_Hangargi]

Lol , i think you answered a wrong question lool

[Aakash_Hangargi]

But thanks for the mention , lol what happened to other people with A hope they are alive and safe 😂😂

Or should I be worried 🤣

[Blackcupcake]

doesn’t really matter, if I really wanted to hug him then I would go for it, I wouldn’t wait for him to do it.

[HeyBenSultan]

It doesn't matter to me, whoever wants to hug first:D

[Sparkie460]

What I used to do is ask her if it was ok if I hugged her. I want her to feel comfortable being with me.

[HippieVeganJewslim]

You. Yes, you. Matters not which gender. Hugs are always free and give social/emotional health.

[Iron_Man]

It all depends on the situation mostly the guy

[KostasKouvalis]

Better if she does so we don't come off as creepy

[art84]

I would ask for a hug first if it's alright from the girl.

[red324]

A hug? I usually get a kiss on the first date.

[legalboxers]

her.. this way you dont get nailed for anything

[notwoke]

this sounds like a question for fragile snowflakes

[moosesixty]

A hug, a hug? I hope you mean she's hugging my penis lol

[Anonymous]

Assuming you want to get laid eventually, you should lead.

[misfittoy]

these days probably the female

[RangerBlue22]

Hugs don’t mean jack

[QuietVerbena]

Let her initiate the hug

[Nikki1989]

I don't think it matters.

[FilmGuy93]

Whoever wants the hug should initiate.

[Jamie05rhs]

Wait- why is a hug necessary?

[007kingifrit]

this is a bad question anyone can do it

[Dinosaursandanime65]

Isn’t that sexual harassment? 🦖🦖☠️☠️💀☠️🌊

[Fuentes]

I don't like hugs

[richgentlem4n]

Whoever feels like it. Lol

[ZenJen444]

You're thinking way too deep

[In_Trance]

whoever wants it more

[BLP11520]

Very slowly, not aggressively

[Rania05]

Does it matter?

[AddylynnNightingale]

Who ever.

[Luopio27]

Botj.

[maximumpower]

Either.

[jamartheg]

Neither of them

[Anonymous]

Bears