In your experience who are better listeners: men or women?

[Still-alive]

Of all the men and women you've known in life: friends, partners, family members etc who tend to be better listeners?

Here's some advice on how to be a better listener:

"Show You Are Listening

Part of really listening is responding in a way that shows the other person we are paying attention. We can demonstrate we are truly listening in four different ways. For example, if a coworker comes to you and complains about their micromanaging boss, you could show you are listening by:

Reflecting back the content
Example: As you see it, your boss is micromanaging you…

Reflecting back the feeling
Example: So you feel frustrated because…

Reflecting both content and feeling
Example: You feel frustrated because your boss is micromanaging you…

Being silent and attentive
A helpful phrase to show you are listening might be:

So you feel ___________________ because ______________________.

Other helpful phrases might include:

You seem…
You sound…
What I’m hearing is…
As you see it…
Tell me more…
Is there anything else…
Not only is listening to others a key life skill, it can also have a tremendous impact on building trust in a relationship. When we take the time to listen, we show the other person that we care—that we are interested in understanding their perspective. That can go a long way toward building, or rebuilding, a relationship.

“The purpose of life is to listen – to yourself, to your neighbor, to your world and to God and, when the time comes, to respond in as helpful a way as you can find … from within and without.” ~ Fred Rogers

Men are pretty good at listening

Women are pretty good at listening

In my life both men and women have equally been good at listening

[tesniolite]

okay i didn't see option C to begin with so ill just explain why i picked the first option
for me, the only friends I've ever felt comfortable talking to were men and 1 non-binary friend who i dont speak to anymore
I've never felt like i could talk about my issues to any of my girl friends - none of them even ask if im okay
so its only rlly been men who give me the chance to talk
granted still I've met a lot of men who are bad at listening

ofc I've answered this thinking more about when it comes to depressing stuff
when its not sad stuff generally its probably women, women interrupt me less
but all my guy friends are great listeners across the board - thats why im friends with them lol

[TenderFantasy]

I think both, it doesn't depend on gender. I've known selfish people where they dominated the conversation and it was a guy, and I've known women of the same caliber. I think it just depends on who has the louder voice OR who cares to listen more. If someone is less selfish than normal, I think that's a good thing haha. But unfortunately, most people wanna talk, and talk about their lives, rather than ask questions. Either that or I am spending time with the "wrong" folks haha.

[Cupido29]

In my life I have seen firsthand how women are not good listeners. Especially if you are a man. Both my ex and my two closest (female) friends have never really been able to listen to me. They have always judged, criticized, and although they have sometimes tried to help me, they are not really capable of it. Not even my aunts. My ex, to be clear, is an ex because she didn't know what to do when I told her I wanted to commit suicide; not only did she not know what to do, but she started saying that she didn't want certain responsibilities. In less serious discussions, such as about university, rather than comforting my outbursts she would tell me that I complain too much and that I should try harder, when they weren't things I wanted to hear in those moments of stress. Male friends, and even my father, were more able to listen to me. Probably the females are up to dialogue only for other females; I have this personal impression.

[Valkyria]

Considering that most guys have been taught their entire lives to stay in their own shells and never open up about their struggles, I'd say that girls listen more, but guys listen more authentically. Women tend to be gossipy too if you talk to the wrong woman about it, or they assume a lot or end up asking a lot of questions about it, which does not correlate with wanting to listen more if the person opening up wants to go slowly and it makes you feel pressured. Women also tend to make it all about themselves, so it ends up being a discussion rather than them just hearing you out: I'm not talking about "I understand that, I've experienced the same thing" but rather them blabbering on about themselves in general and not giving you the chance to talk. Don't get me started on women making fun of men if they show any "weakness", or making fun of them for holing themselves up because you made them. Talk about being stuck between a rock and a hard place.

[Puppystarfish23]

Honestly in my opinion men are better listeners as much as hate to amit it.

All the men in life always remember the little details about me that I've mentioned before and will generally sit down and listen to me if I have a issue.

With women a lot of the time they want to hear it and only think of ourselves. I've never had a female friend take as much interest into me as my male friends do.

[red324]

I think men pretend not to listen or act like they aren't, but they do. I may not have an answer right away, but I'll be thinking about what you said a day or two later.

[admles]

I've found it pretty equal, although most women aren't the good listeners they seem to think they are, they have a tendency to overthink, and hear things you didn't actually say / mean, whereas guys will take what you said at face value, at least in my personal experience.

[DizzyDesii]

I only really care to talk to men so them lmao. When i talk to other women, they probably listen but i just yap away so i dont really notice their reaction

[EclipsedMoonlight]

Both. I have both amazing guy and girl friends that both listen and give awesome advice. It's more personality qualities over gender. Both can either be amazing or both can be selfish and ignorant.

[Whatthefluff]

Anyone can be a good listener, but women generally have more empathy and conversation skills. It’s also been shown that people feel more “heard” when speaking to a female vs male.

[FreyaRed]

Depends on person and topic. Sometimes is logic more important, sometimes is emotional intelligence more useful for me.

[lightbulb27]

people who listen, not male/female.

most people don't want to listen because it disturbs their own beliefs.

[dreamstar72]

Really it depends on who talking to whom
Male - female = female are most of the times
Male - male = neither most of the time
Female - female = omg he/she said/did what most of the time

[The_Shadow_Dweller]

So the opposite gender is the better listener. Overall, from all the comments I read. Women say men are. Men say women are.

[Levin]

In my experience, women. Although as a counsellor, I notice both genders can be bad listeners.

[anon1903]

I think men. Women are cooler with supportive responses, but guys are the ones that let me finish talking lmao.

[GoodGuyBreakingBad]

Women are pretty good at listening… All the female Counselors I have had, they were all compassion and good listeners.

[Sour-rose]

Women do the best. Men however... can be awful listeners. :1

[Sparkie460]

I think it depends on the person and their mood. When someone needs a listening ear I'm there for them. When my wife is talking she says that I don't listen to her. Lol

[KAYJJAY]

Men are better at listening but terrible at advice in person... over text its fine but in person they are awkward usually.

[NostalgiaSenpi]

I've noticed plenty on both sides that are good listeners and that are bad ones, too. Im fortunate enough to have some people that do listen.

[Nikki1989]

Most men only hear what they want to hear.

[Freyke]

Men, but maybe that's because I'm one and they understand me better.