So to tell the story I’m 19 almost 20. From the time I was a teenager I was always “thick” I had about 30 pounds more weight than I should plus I was tall. I had a problem with depression from my home life and bullying and stress so I would gain and lose weight (I also worked out a lot) but was under 200 lbs Anyway when I was seventeen I ended up with a bag injury and couldn’t get out of bed for over a year. I was doing school online and on pain pills and depressed and frustrated and I ended up gaining 45 pounds in nearly 2 years. Well after a year of physical therapy I was finally cleared to exercise again. So I went off to college and was planning to eat healthy and workout to lose the weight I had gained and absolutely hated. No matter how well I ate or how much or little I ate or worked out. I gained weight. I just kept gaining and for a couple months I couldn’t figure it out. I felt ugly and gross and I felt it was my fault. Christmas I got the flu and I didn’t eat anything at all for two weeks and I couldn’t stop puking either. Instead of losing at least a pound or 2 I gained 10 pounds i finally went to the doctor I found out that my thyroid had almost shut down (that controls metabolism) And immediately I was put onto a high dose of meds to help because my levels are near shut down. I was told the pills would take months to take affect. My levels were also life threateningly low. So now I weight 290 lbs. I’ve never felt more ugly and more insecure in my life. I want a life and a relationship and happiness and I’m disgusted with myself. For context I was actually pretty before this weight.
But a couple weeks ago a guy messaged me and we have talked and he is so so sweet and he told me he thought I was beautiful he’s seen old and current photos and body pics.
He wants to meet and told me if things went well he wants a relationship.
I like him and I think he’s a nice guy and I want to have a relationship and sex.
I’m scared he’s gonna think I’m unattractive
But a couple weeks ago a guy messaged me and we have talked and he is so so sweet and he told me he thought I was beautiful he’s seen old and current photos and body pics.
He wants to meet and told me if things went well he wants a relationship.
I like him and I think he’s a nice guy and I want to have a relationship and sex.
I’m scared he’s gonna think I’m unattractive
Updates
1 y
But I’m insecure of my body and I’m terrified he’s gonna hate my body or be disgusted by me. I’m trying to lose weight but I don’t wanna step on a scale. I don’t want him to know how I feel. But I’m so scared and I honestly and thinking about not meeting him.
Am I being stupid or am I right to think he’s gonna think I’m gross?
He is very handsome and he works out and is very sexy and I feel like a ugly blob and I don’t see why he would want me.
Should I cancel?
Am I being stupid or am I right to think he’s gonna think I’m gross?
He is very handsome and he works out and is very sexy and I feel like a ugly blob and I don’t see why he would want me.
Should I cancel?
What Girls & Guys Said
Opinion
2Opinion
Sounds to me like you lack a lot of nutrition and that's from your unhealthy ways of fighting your weight, you can definitely lose weight again, don't let this feel like you are stuck like this, you just gotta do it healthier, you are doing it wrong, go to a nutrition expert and have them help you with a proper healthy diet, or a training couch, they know their shit too, make sure to tell then your medical situation as well.
I appreciate the suggestion however I’ve seen probably seven different doctors in the last four months. The thyroid problem was something that is in my family history and I had no control over its levels. Tbh I skipped meals a lot in that time and was gaining weight like crazy and I should have noticed sooner. I’ve seen specialists and nutritionist and titles I don’t remember. I was told I eat very healthy for my age with occasional treats which is normal. And to eat fruits and vegetables and work out when I could and to take my meds and they would reevaluate in a couple months. I’m eating very well other than I had one piece of Easter candy and I’m exercising almost every day. At this point it’s out of my hands on that. I don’t know if it’s working or not because I honestly don’t want to get on a scale but I’m scared of what he’s going to think of my body
If he cares about you, your health is what will matter to him, some information I forgot to leave out, the body bloats when it doesn't have enough water or food.
Not forgot but that I left out
I understand that but it was explained to me by doctors that the system that gets rid of the calories and the fat that has been burned and etc was about to shut down and was not working properly. It was so bad it didn’t matter what when and how much I ate at that point
I’m taking meds that replicate that it’s fully functional however it’s too soon to really tell yet plus if it completely shut down I’m told I will have to have surgery.
Also this is as I said a guy who I’m just starting to possibly date do you really think all of this is stuff I should tell him?
Tbh at this point its not really important, you getting better is, if he doesn't then there's plenty of fish in the sea and he wasn't the perfect catch for you, just focus on getting better, tell him and whatever he decides is on him, my best wishes on that surgery. 💯🙏
I appreciate that. I hopefully won’t have to have surgery it’s only if it does fully shut down. The last time it was checked it was 10% functioning.
You should also look into natural remedies for that part of your body so it can get a higher chance of it regenerating, natural herbs and stuff, go to a Asian market and get yourself a tea, they got teas for everything.
I he thinks you're attractive now, I don't see how that would change with your clothes off. Some guys are really into big girls