Is it mean to tell my boyfriend that I prefer him to lose some weight?

[Anonymous]

We been together for 12 years now so I feel like I should be honest with him and not lie to him. We talked about how he has gain weight over the months and that he is at his heaviest. I’ve also gain some pounds but just a few not a lot. I talked to him about going on walks or doing some kind of sports. He use to attend a jiu jitsu class and that kept him in shape but ever since he got injured he stopped and he is now better but mean while he got this new hobby and is going to yu gi oh tournaments , which I don’t mind but I rather have him go once in a while to work out. I’ve told him to work out with me but it just doesn’t happen.

[kylee2437]

So personally I think telling a partner they need to lose weight / work out does not really do anything and it can hurt your relationship in theory. In order for a person to lose weight, they mostly need to do it because they want to do it and outside sources are not likely help them out on that unless if they want the help. The guy I’m currently seeing isn’t into fitness but I can a fitness junky, and I feel like because I am a fitness junky, he is being influenced by that. I think you need to make your like for fitness more known but also, does he go to doctors appointments for physicals and such?

[kylee2437]

I am a fitness junky*

[Asker]

So I’ve talked to him about going to a gym and working out. He knows I’m timid to go but he once told me he was down to go with me but just last week he told me that he is not a gym person and he rather do martial arts so that’s a no. He doesn’t go to regular check ups only if he really needs to like when he was injured. I honestly don’t want him to gain more weight but that’s on him. At least he is well aware that he needs to be healthier and not ignoring it.

[Anonymous]

As mean as it is to tell a woman.

[Asker]

I don’t mind my partner telling me that I need to
Lose some weight. Ofc he probably won’t tell me I’m a mean way but I have told him how I feel about my weight and the times that I felt to gain or lose some pounds.

[Opinion Owner]

Well, you have your answer then. Common sense applies.

[Anonymous]

I got a better idea, offer to join a gym together.