Why do I always get stood up?

[Anonymous]

Hi

So I’m married & we have an open relationship - I look for friends with benefits on dating apps & I’m always honest and make my situation clear. I chat to a lot of younger lads (generally 25-35) I’m 45.
I find though that I chat to these young men and they tell me they are keen to meet…it’s flirty and sexy and on the odd occasion I may have sent some nudes.

However, on more than one occasion, when the time comes to meet they vanish. I have asked them why and they say that they get scared and chicken out!!! Is this true?

[Oliverlogan263]

Yo, that's really weird that these guys keep standing you up. Getting stood up always sucks. From what you described, it honestly sounds like maybe they're just getting cold feet last minute or something. A lot of younger guys that age probably haven't been in many situations like that before, ya know? Even if you're upfront about everything, I could see how actually meeting up might make some dudes nervous.

When it comes to any kind of hook ups, people can say one thing online but react different when it's time to actually meet face-to-face. And some guys your age might still be immature and chicken out easily. It's probably not anything personal against you - I doubt they'd stand up a hot girl their own age! Maybe try chatting with guys a bit older than 25-35 next time, they might be more comfortable with this type of thing. And don't send nudes right away, wait til you've actually met in person first so they're more invested. Don't let it get you down - their loss! You'll find someone who won't flake.

[Avicenna]

It’s quite possible. Must guys aren’t comfortable with your situation.

[DannyUk2017]

Because they think that instead of "you" turning up, could be that "your man" is turning up, and could get ugly, so i guess they think of the "risk", rather than pleasure, they don't know hiw serious you are about it. 🤷‍♂️

[boggboss]

Could be the guys your coming across are just looking for some fun online

[Joshydavid25]

They probably think it could be your man turning up or you and him meeting up together.. Unless you made it clear that it's just you.. Maybe they feel weird about getting with a woman that's married.

[Fireguy17]

Probably because you are married.
That might be a big reason

[AmeerX]

Why do you want a relationship outside marriage if you have a husband?

[Wise4myage]

Maybe its a sign you should stop being in an open relationship.

[gorydetails]

Since they’re saying it - it must be true.